who we are in different situations???

[Guest guest]

Good morning;

In a recent post, someone mentioned being different in real life than on the

internet.

My initial thought was " I am the same person in either setting, " **See

footnote

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BUT on thinking it over, realized that I DO act differently in different

situations.

Some of this is due to what I percieve the situation requires of me, and/or how

comfortable I feel in that setting:

1. work requires a more polished persona. I am a representative of my employer.

2.On an internet forum, I am freindlier, more tactful, more empathetic, not

feeling the same pressure as in 'face time.'

If I don't have the energy to communicate, I don't have to, also am not

overwhelmed by sensory input.

3. at church, am more myself than at work. am my own person, respecting the

customs and formality of the system.

4. personal time my own time, where I don't feel a need or obligation to be

social.

(this is not necessarily " hiding' at home)

When out and about, I try to be tactful when some extrovert wants to chat

beyond a few sentences and I don't want to, carrying a book to read often helps,

along with saying I am tired from work and taking a break.

When at home, have learned to tell my family when I am taking time off from

human interaction, they don't always respect or remember, but its a progressive

thing. Also don't HAVE to answer the phone, we have a message system, and can

listen to messages and deal with them when needed!!!

5. public persona: both church and work: from my various duties, people

sometimes recognize me when I am out and about, am prepared for BREIF small

talk.

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However, to some extent, I am still the same basic person wherever I am, an

introvert who lives her life in 'neat' mental compartments.

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How do you folks feel about different situations and what aspects of your

personality do you use or exhibit in them?

renaissanzelady

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** that night I had a strange dream:

In this dream, I was walking along a street similair to a street in my home

city. (Melvin Street in Sudbury)

It was daylight, not too warm or too cool.

In this dream, the houses on one side had stone roofs, not clay tile, but

chunks of rough stone or rock interspersed with a few pieces of 'mica shist', a

translucent mineral.

These roofs were either peaked roofs or mansard roofs, quite low to the ground.

Being curious, I turned up an intesecting street, then down a back alley behind

these houses.

To my surprise, at the back, they were 2 or 3 floor appartments with balconies,

a common lawn at ground level, and people of diffent ethnicities out and about.

This was all quite open, public space, I exchanged greetings with anyone I

met.

The laneway came to a gradual end, turned into a grassy expanse which was behind

other dwellings. I had a very strong feeling that this was private space and not

to go further.

The dream ended then.

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This is like an allegory of life:

the street face of the houses; representing our public selves

the back vioew of th houses; replresenting how we are with friends etc

the grassy area at the end: either representing the fact trhat some peopl

reveale very little or that we all hav a secret life.

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This interpretation was confirmed by a forensics video my daughter was listening

to later;

people have THREE PERSONAS:

their social persona, that which they show to cohorts/colleagues,

their family persona, which they reveal to family and freinds,

thirdly, their secret self which others might not know;

(this episode was about a fire dept. employee who was charged with arson.)

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