Wimpy mom or therapist being too tough?

September 18, 2009

We had another appointment (3rd one) with our therapist. She does CBT and keyed

into OCD at the first appointment based on our descriptions (hoarding, decision

problems, evening out...). Today she asked how it was going (we were on a 2

week vacation in AK) and I mentioned that wouldn't comply with any

directions (get out of bed, get dressed, eat, brush teeth...). She asked what

worked to get her to comply and I said that the only thing that worked was to

take away one of her toys until she did it after much yelling ( would get

the toy back after finishing). Therapist said that I should be keeping the toy

for a week, and if it continued, 2 weeks and then to take away everything in her

room, if the behavior is still continuing after a month, for her to earn back.

She said that this was a power struggle and as long as was fighting me for

power, she wouldn't work on her problems. In some ways I agree. I've been

bending over backward, trying to help her when she is raging and it just seems

to be getting worse. When I am tough and don't cave in she seems to calm down

faster (for example, when I lock myself in the bathroom instead of staying with

her for her to yell at, the tantrum takes less time).

Any thoughts?

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