Teen bully reacts to victim's media attention

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http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2009/03/01/8577806-sun.html?cid=ETF

Teen bully reacts to victim's media attention

Hyde's tormentor tells why she did it

By MICHELE MANDEL, SUN MEDIA

The Toronto Sun

TORONTO - The bully who made Hyde's school year a living hell has always

dreamed of being famous.

" Well i got arested cuz of some girl. im in the news b/c of the Same girl. i

always want fame, " the 15-year-old ringleader writes on her Facebook page. " T H

A N K X for givin me the spot light. "

Look past her atrocious spelling, and the girl we'll call Sara offers a

frightening window into the troubled soul of a bully.

Her victim first told her story here last Sunday, of how she has endured months

of taunting and attacks by a pack of mean girls at West Credit Secondary School

in Mississauga. In January, their bullying escalated into a horrifying assault

on her schoolbus, in which had pens hurled at her, chewed gum shoved

down her shirt and an open condom smeared all over her face and jacket. While

none of her fellow students or bus driver came to her aid, one of the girls then

punched her in the face.

's harrowing experience has been the subject of talk radio shows all week

and has elicited hundreds of e-mails and website outrage at the prevalence of

bullying in our midst. Every missive came with a similar story of school torment

more upsetting than the next.

But why? Why is so much of this happening? What makes these bullies pick on

others with such wanton cruelty?

After a lengthy and chilling conversation with Sara, there were no more answers

than before, except that she's clearly a kid who needs help.

Because of the bus incident, Sara -- who can't be identified as she's before the

courts as a youth offender -- was charged with assault and expelled. She was

charged again last week with breaching her release conditions when she was seen

back on school property. " I'm pretty much getting screwed, " she says.

Sara now insists she regrets what she did to and keeps repeating that

she didn't " plan " the attack, as if that makes it so much better. So why did she

lead the swarming on the bus?

" I was joking around with her and it got really serious, " she says, insisting

she's never harboured any animosity towards . " I had no problems with her

except once in a while when she was being snobby. If I was really mad at her, I

would've beat her up, you know? "

Sara says the whole bus was involved, with everyone pelting with pens

and condoms, yet she's the one who took the blame for everything. She wonders

why the other students took part and then answers her own question in a rare

moment of introspection. " I'm a really big influence on other people, " Sara

says. " I regret what I've done. "

But why? The ringleader is pressed again for what made her torment and humiliate

a poor girl who she admits did her no wrong?

" I guess I was jealous in a way, " Sara finally confesses. " Or trying to be

cool. "

It seems that what she's most envious of is 's closeness with her mother,

who has relentlessly fought the school to provide her a safer environment. Sara

lives with her dad. " He thinks it's very appalling what I've done and obviously

he wasn't impressed, " she explains.

And her mom? She grows very quiet. " I don't live with my mom. "

That missing part of her life will surface over and over in our conversation:

" She has her mom, I don't have my mom. I stick up for myself, " Sara says at one

point. " Her mother sticks up for her and that's the best thing because she can't

stick up for herself and I wish she could stick up for herself, " she says at

another.

" I'm a very troubled girl, that's the thing, " Sara admits. " Every week I get

suspended because of stupidity. I guess school wasn't working for me. "

Asked for examples, she gives a little chuckle and recalls the time she slipped

her chewed gum into the principal's coffee. " I got suspended for that. "

Ironically, she was once " jumped " at her old school, but unlike , she

just laughed it off. She really expected her victim to do the same.

So Sara is feeling pretty sorry for herself. She's afraid, especially after a

court appearance last week with other young offenders. " All these girls were so

f----d up. I don't wanna end like that, " she says.

And she's angry that she's taking the fall when her fellow mean girls are off

the hook. " I haven't eaten in three days, " she complains. " I'm so stressed out. "

Sara has to leave for a meeting about moving to a new school. " I'm starting my

life over early, " she insists. But before ringing off, the teen wants to know if

we can relay a message.

" If you can tell that I'm really happy for her that her mom is there for

her sticking up for her. I don't have my mom. And I'm really sorry for hurting

her physically and emotionally. It wasn't my intention.

" I know she can stick up for herself. I have faith in her. "

And for a moment, she sounds so sincere. And then you remember that earlier,

Sara had confided her greatest ambition: she wants to be an actress.