Does being the oldest, middle or youngest child affect your personality?

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Does being the oldest, middle or youngest child affect your personality? Get the

real deal on birth order

By Raizel Robin

If you're the first-born in the family, ever notice how you just can't help but

offer helpful, if unsolicited, advice to your younger sibs? If you're a middle

child, in between taking orders from your bossy older sis, do you always find

yourself settling family arguments? And we all know what the youngest spends her

time doing: goofing off and causing trouble. It's just common sense: the oldest

child is responsible, the middle child is diplomatic, the baby of the family is

the rebel - and the only child is spoiled for life. But is there any truth to

these stereotypes? Does birth order really affect your personality?

The short answer is, sort of. " Birth order doesn't determine personality, " says

Nina Howe, professor of early childhood and elementary education at Concordia

University in Montreal. Personality is the result of a number of factors.

Genetics, education, social and economic environment, and any number of life

experiences all play a part in shaping who you are. In fact, Judith Rich ,

a developmental psychologist based in New Jersey who published The Nurture

Assumption in 1998, is one of many psychologists who don't buy the birth-order

theory. says our personalities are formed by a lot more than our family

influences, including birth order. That's because children - especially teens -

try to behave more like their peers than their families.

So why do people think birth order has an effect? " Psychologists all agree that

personality has something to do with what went on when you were a child, " says

Del hus, professor of psychology at the University of British Columbia. And

everyone has a family. One theory is that children seek to find their own niche

in the clan. So siblings will work to differentiate themselves from each other,

possibly falling into typical birth-order positions. Keep reading to see how

your personality traits compare to those associated with particular birth-order

positions.

If you're the first in line...Oldest kids are the only child in the family for

awhile, which is why first-borns share many personality traits with onlies.

Their parents are new to the game so tend to have high expectations, which

drives first-borns to achieve at all costs. Growing up in Montreal, Isabelle

Bonsaint had dreams of being a fashion designer until her parents discouraged

her. " They said it was fine as a leisure activity, but for a career you need

something solid, " says Bonsaint, now 30. She obliged - typical first-born

behaviour - and sacrificed her dreams. Instead, she opted for psychology, a

field she knew little about (but has since grown to love). Oldest kids stick to

the family rules. They tend to be conservative, responsible, status-conscious

and - due to the praise parents lavish upon them for following the rules -

self-confident.

If you're stuck in the middle...Chloe Stuart knows what that's all about. The

32-year-old native of Kingston, Ont., is the second-born of three girls. She

says she's the typical middle child - good-natured and empathetic. " I've always

been the peacemaker in the family, " she says. " I hate discord. " When she does

see a fight, Chloe says she plays the diplomat, listening carefully to each side

and then trying to get the parties to see common ground.

If you're bringing up the rear...The last-born have to find a way to assert

their individuality. " You already have an environment created for you, " says

Alison Morley, 29, an administrator at the University of Toronto and the

youngest child of two. " You have to find your own way to navigate it. " Younger

children tend to be a little more rebellious, a little less authoritarian, and

more likely to take risks - because they know they can get away with it. The

babies of the family are also known for their agreeable and affectionate

natures.

First published in Chatelaine.com's February 2006 issue

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