Re: Third Question

[Guest guest]

Not about being AS, because that was little known and not obvious in my case. However, I have been called:

Bookworm, nerd, geek, brainage, goober, dweeb, loser, queer, etc. Being called queer is particularly odd since I am straight.

I've also been called a character, eccentric, quiet, serious, well spoken, etc. These I consider compliments, though I'm not sure they were always meant in that way.

In a message dated 4/7/2009 4:59:14 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, no_reply writes:

Have you ever been called a "retard" or a similar name just because you have AS?Administrator Feeling the pinch at the grocery store? Make dinner for $10 or less.

[Guest guest]

Hi:

when I was in elementary school, and evven more socially inept than I am now, some 'friends' from school were over at my house. One of them asked me if I was 'handicapped'.

Being a literalist 'I said 'no, I can walk'

She then commented that some of my stuff was for a younger child and wondered if I was 'slow' or something. I was quite inslted and told her that. I can't remember what happened next.

A few years ago, one of my colleagues in the office expressed surprise when he found out I had a University Degree. I asked WHY he was surprised, and he said because I am quiet and keep to myself, and never mentioned having a University education.

I replied that the bosses know about it from when I applied for the supervisory job, but that the specialty I got my degreee in does not directly pertain to my work here, so I don't mention it. ( he seemed too obtuse to realize that I seldom mention my personal life.)

I found his attitude insulting, and challenged him on why he thought I would have spoken of having an Education??)

At times, I may have been insulted for being an outspoken female in a chauvenistic culture.

renaissanzelady

Have you ever been called a "retard" or a similar name just because you have AS?Administrator

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[Guest guest]

My own situation was half and half.

I've been ribbed for " staring " at everything rather than making eye contact. I

have been accused of being a " quasi moto " for not responding to people right

away as I internalize what has been said.

There have been other insults along the way.

But my nickname in high school chemistry was " Einstien " (who was of course into

physics, not chemistry) because I could get the scientific results without using

textbook scientific methods if I knew what the outcome of the experiments were

supposed to be.

Regarding you being called an " outspoken female " , that is discouraging. I have

witnessed women with good business sense as well as good common sense being

ignored because of men being intimidated by the fact that a female could

out-think them.

Administrator

when I was in elementary school, and evven more socially inept than I am now,

some 'friends' from school were over at my house. One of them asked me if I was

'handicapped'.

Being a literalist 'I said 'no, I can walk'

She then commented that some of my stuff was for a younger child and wondered if

I was 'slow' or something. I was quite inslted and told her that. I can't

remember what happened next.

A few years ago, one of my colleagues in the office expressed surprise when he

found out I had a University Degree. I asked WHY he was surprised, and he said

because I am quiet and keep to myself, and never mentioned having a University

education.

I replied that the bosses know about it from when I applied for the supervisory

job, but that the specialty I got my degreee in does not directly pertain to my

work here, so I don't mention it. ( he seemed too obtuse to realize that I

seldom mention my personal life.)

I found his attitude insulting, and challenged him on why he thought I would

have spoken of having an Education??)

At times, I may have been insulted for being an outspoken female in a

chauvenistic culture.

renaissanzelady

[Guest guest]

Hi :My daughter gets annoyed if we are together, not talking, AND while thinking, I seem to be staring 'through her,'

I am not doing this consciously, I have merely tuned her out and am lost in thought.

Since this annoys her, I try to look at a wall or something else inanimate.

Some people seem to not only have a bias against an outspoken female, but also still hold to the stereotype that; in a family, the wife is the one who arranges social things etc for the family. Thus many of my behaviours seem out of step with custom:

I have no problem speakng out in a public setting, whether formal or informal, BUT I don't 'do' social stuff very often.

On a somewhat related note, I make an effort to not be racist, or prejudiced. When my husband became friends with a family from a visible minority, they invited all 3 of us to visit them. I did not go at first becasue it involves a drive out of the city, and my husband likes to stay many hours to visit. (after an hour or two I would be happy to go home, but I am trapped when we go to a rural area together) Eventually I did go, becasue I am aware that there is prejudice against this people's culture, and I did not want them to think I was prejudiced and be offended. When I met them and their extended family, I found them very interesting people to talk with. So although I still don't go out every time my husband and daughter go, I do go out sometimes.renaissanzelady

My own situation was half and half. I've been ribbed for "staring" at everything rather than making eye contact. I have been accused of being a "quasi moto" for not responding to people right away as I internalize what has been said. There have been other insults along the way.But my nickname in high school chemistry was "Einstien" (who was of course into physics, not chemistry) because I could get the scientific results without using textbook scientific methods if I knew what the outcome of the experiments were supposed to be. Regarding you being called an "outspoken female", that is discouraging. I have witnessed women with good business sense as well as good common sense being ignored because of men being intimidated by the fact that a female could out-think them. Administratorwhen I was in elementary school, and evven more socially inept than I am now, some 'friends' from school were over at my house. One of them asked me if I was 'handicapped' . Being a literalist 'I said 'no, I can walk' She then commented that some of my stuff was for a younger child and wondered if I was 'slow' or something. I was quite inslted and told her that. I can't remember what happened next.A few years ago, one of my colleagues in the office expressed surprise when he found out I had a University Degree. I asked WHY he was surprised, and he said because I am quiet and keep to myself, and never mentioned having a University education.I replied that the bosses know about it from when I applied for the supervisory job, but that the specialty I got my degreee in does not directly pertain to my work here, so I don't mention it. ( he seemed

too obtuse to realize that I seldom mention my personal life.) I found his attitude insulting, and challenged him on why he thought I would have spoken of having an Education??)At times, I may have been insulted for being an outspoken female in a chauvenistic culture.renaissanzelady

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[Guest guest]

Hi ;On a positive note, I have also been called --an eccentric; --well read, --unstable (not mentally but in my religious life)--a wild card (others never know what I will say or ask)--a 'pot stirrer', I will ask things that others might be afraid to ask because of upsetting someone or being embarassed themselves--someone to go to when people want information, or how to find information; possessing knowledge of odd facts and somewhat odd skills--when my mom was not engaged in trying to force me to be more outgoing, she did say 'still waters run deep' Fellow Eccentrics, Let's take pride in who we are and thank the Creator for our uniqueness!renaissanzelady

I've also been called a character, eccentric, quiet, serious, well spoken, etc. These I consider compliments, though I'm not sure they were always meant in that way.

In a message dated 4/7/2009 4:59:14 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, no_reply@yahoogroup s.com writes:

Have you ever been called a "retard" or a similar name just because you have AS?Administrator

Now with a new friend-happy design! Try the new Yahoo! Canada Messenger

[Guest guest]

My daughter gets annoyed if we are together, not talking, AND while thinking, I seem to be staring 'through her,'

I am not doing this consciously, I have merely tuned her out and am lost in thought.

Since this annoys her, I try to look at a wall or something else inanimate.

Aspies tune out. They also hate it when other people tune out.

Some people seem to not only have a bias against an outspoken female, but also still hold to the stereotype that; in a family, the wife is the one who arranges social things etc for the family. Thus many of my behaviours seem out of step with custom:

It's a backwards way of thinking. Everyone ought to do what comes naturally to them. They should use the abilities they were born with and not have them be trounced on because they are of a certain sex.

I have no problem speakng out in a public setting, whether formal or informal, BUT I don't 'do' social stuff very often.

Put a podium in front of me and I am fine. I can do TV interviews and radio shows without a problem. Put me in a social setting and I am out of my league.

On a somewhat related note, I make an effort to not be racist, or prejudiced.

Racism is wrong. But we are all prejudiced whether we want to admit it or not. Pre-judging people is part of an inbuilt safety mechanism. I am not saying it is good to be prejudiced. Prejudice that goes unfettered only worsens things.

When my husband became friends with a family from a visible minority, they invited all 3 of us to visit them. I did not go at first becasue it involves a drive out of the city, and my husband likes to stay many hours to visit. (after an hour or two I would be happy to go home, but I am trapped when we go to a rural area together) Eventually I did go, becasue I am aware that there is prejudice against this people's culture, and I did not want them to think I was prejudiced and be offended. When I met them and their extended family, I found them very interesting people to talk with. So although I still don't go out every time my husband and daughter go, I do go out sometimes.Yep. Raven and I are in what society would call an interracial relationship. It pays to keep an open mind.

Administrator