Re: Dreamer - trying to be amused

[Guest guest]

nah, no neighbors, when we moved here 16 years ago and our gilrs were little and

hubby got sick, well people found it odd tohave a stay at home dad with 2 very

little girls....and they were not amused by his mental illness. Friendships

became difficult tomaintain while working double shifts every day for so many

years...most of my co workers also worked double shifts so noone ever had time

to be social. Becuz I worked weekends and holidays, too- church sort of fell by

the wayside years ago....we tried to go back, but my sister is so active in the

church, it made us uncomfortable.we tried a different chucrch and the church we

chose was not a good choice, and my mobility difficulties combined with disabled

kids made it really hard to get there regularly.

The good news is I do somehow manage to be pretty independant, I have learned

how to get my wheelchair in and out alone provided my hands are not flaring too

bad....and my electric scooter and I have learned how to combine a walker and

crutches with the wheelchair and scooter to give myself maximum independance....

What I have not yet learned to cope with is my emotions about all of it

regarding the people in my life. I keep trying to figure out just what kind of

monster I could have been. I never did figure it out- most f my youth I spent

taking care of my mom and her twins and then later her baby- even tho she sent

me away at age 12 as she felt I might unduly burden her new husband......

I worked my 2 jobs hours around he hours she needed me to come take care of

her.....and her babies...and later I cared for my own kids around moms

schedule....

Some days I spend more time on a pity pot than others, sadly it seems to me the

times when I come here and post are my worst times...not my better

days....mostly I guess I am scared about my moms safety right now and I am so

asad about my sons eye and my husband scared me being so ill...

Please I do love tohear good things here, I love to hear people being kind,

people helping each other...but- if you are having a hard time.please know I

understand and sympathize.

I loved being a nurse and helping people.I truly loved it. Right now I do not

like who I am this moment......

whiney and self pity....

- In , " Barb K. " <zigerrr@y...> wrote:

>

> I know your situation is not good. I feel so bad and wish that I was there to

help you out. Isn't there anyone who can get to the store for you?? I know you

can't count on your family and you're mom can't take care of herself but do you

have any neighbors, friends, church members, friends of your kids, parents of

friends of your kids that you could ask to do the shopping??

> much love,

> barb k.

>

> dreamer_plus <dreamer_plus@w...> wrote:

> I am still trying to get amused, but it is so hard.....(see my recent previous

posts)

> too often in my world, " people not getting it " tend to help create outright

dangerous situations.......

> and I feel so let down by the people who appear to the rest of the world to be

caring people due to their volunteer wokr or their professions, but who in fact

to me seem to only do things that show up in the public eye and make them seem

like big shot heros.

> Sadly, now that my son is on themend and hubby seems to be getting a tad

stronger and oldest child (bipolar) is resigned to her birthday slipping thru

all the other crisises- I am flaring, my left ankle and right hip----terribly.

My rheumy retired and our docs office has not yet found a replacement....we need

food and groceries in...for all the good it does to need.

> I am having major difficulty being amused, I am stuck right now in resentful,

anger, bitter, disappointed.....

>

>

>

> - In , " rmcg " wrote:

> >

> > Ok, my two and a half cents here.

> > I have had physical difficulties all my life, so I hope that I'm emphatic

with others.

> > However, I do get disgusted with those who have never ever had any physical

problems and no clue whatsoever how hard it can be for those of us who do have

problems.

> > i.e: DH had heart attack. One month later, BIL was harrassing him about

making plans for a cross country driving trip and wanted a committment NOW.

Needless to say, he/we did not go, but BIL still doesn't understand why we

wouldn't go. (even if dh had been in condition,no way would I be able to make

the type of trip BIL would have wanted)

> >

> > That's an extreme example, but I run into it all the time. I wouldn't want

to wish anything on anyone, but I do wish that people would get a minute bit of

understanding when I/we say " I hurt " , or " I can't " . I guess I just drop those

that are too insenstive, but what does one do with family?

> >

> > End of rant. g* Back to regularly scheduled list.

> >

> > Thanks for putting up with me.

> >

> > Rose

> > ----- Original Message -----

> > From: brightt@l...

> >

> >

> >

> > >>>>>

> >

> >

> >

> > Every once in a while I try to educate someone about what living with

> > RA is like, but they rarely understand. After that day, I thought why

> > worry about it? Why waste my energy unless someone has sincere

> > interest? I'm trying to keep this perspective and just be wryly amused

> > by some of the strange/insensitive/uninformed things people say about

> > RA. Of course, I know this attitude is nearly impossible for those of

> > you who have spouses, children, etc. who aren't understanding. I'm

> > fortunate to live with just my 2 dogs, who really have no opinion about

> > it and are especially loving when I'm in pain.

> >

> > Many good wishes to each one of you brave people.

> >

> > Prakasha

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

nah, no neighbors, when we moved here 16 years ago and our gilrs were little and

hubby got sick, well people found it odd tohave a stay at home dad with 2 very

little girls....and they were not amused by his mental illness. Friendships

became difficult tomaintain while working double shifts every day for so many

years...most of my co workers also worked double shifts so noone ever had time

to be social. Becuz I worked weekends and holidays, too- church sort of fell by

the wayside years ago....we tried to go back, but my sister is so active in the

church, it made us uncomfortable.we tried a different chucrch and the church we

chose was not a good choice, and my mobility difficulties combined with disabled

kids made it really hard to get there regularly.

The good news is I do somehow manage to be pretty independant, I have learned

how to get my wheelchair in and out alone provided my hands are not flaring too

bad....and my electric scooter and I have learned how to combine a walker and

crutches with the wheelchair and scooter to give myself maximum independance....

What I have not yet learned to cope with is my emotions about all of it

regarding the people in my life. I keep trying to figure out just what kind of

monster I could have been. I never did figure it out- most f my youth I spent

taking care of my mom and her twins and then later her baby- even tho she sent

me away at age 12 as she felt I might unduly burden her new husband......

I worked my 2 jobs hours around he hours she needed me to come take care of

her.....and her babies...and later I cared for my own kids around moms

schedule....

Some days I spend more time on a pity pot than others, sadly it seems to me the

times when I come here and post are my worst times...not my better

days....mostly I guess I am scared about my moms safety right now and I am so

asad about my sons eye and my husband scared me being so ill...

Please I do love tohear good things here, I love to hear people being kind,

people helping each other...but- if you are having a hard time.please know I

understand and sympathize.

I loved being a nurse and helping people.I truly loved it. Right now I do not

like who I am this moment......

whiney and self pity....

- In , " Barb K. " <zigerrr@y...> wrote:

>

> I know your situation is not good. I feel so bad and wish that I was there to

help you out. Isn't there anyone who can get to the store for you?? I know you

can't count on your family and you're mom can't take care of herself but do you

have any neighbors, friends, church members, friends of your kids, parents of

friends of your kids that you could ask to do the shopping??

> much love,

> barb k.

>

> dreamer_plus <dreamer_plus@w...> wrote:

> I am still trying to get amused, but it is so hard.....(see my recent previous

posts)

> too often in my world, " people not getting it " tend to help create outright

dangerous situations.......

> and I feel so let down by the people who appear to the rest of the world to be

caring people due to their volunteer wokr or their professions, but who in fact

to me seem to only do things that show up in the public eye and make them seem

like big shot heros.

> Sadly, now that my son is on themend and hubby seems to be getting a tad

stronger and oldest child (bipolar) is resigned to her birthday slipping thru

all the other crisises- I am flaring, my left ankle and right hip----terribly.

My rheumy retired and our docs office has not yet found a replacement....we need

food and groceries in...for all the good it does to need.

> I am having major difficulty being amused, I am stuck right now in resentful,

anger, bitter, disappointed.....

>

>

>

> - In , " rmcg " wrote:

> >

> > Ok, my two and a half cents here.

> > I have had physical difficulties all my life, so I hope that I'm emphatic

with others.

> > However, I do get disgusted with those who have never ever had any physical

problems and no clue whatsoever how hard it can be for those of us who do have

problems.

> > i.e: DH had heart attack. One month later, BIL was harrassing him about

making plans for a cross country driving trip and wanted a committment NOW.

Needless to say, he/we did not go, but BIL still doesn't understand why we

wouldn't go. (even if dh had been in condition,no way would I be able to make

the type of trip BIL would have wanted)

> >

> > That's an extreme example, but I run into it all the time. I wouldn't want

to wish anything on anyone, but I do wish that people would get a minute bit of

understanding when I/we say " I hurt " , or " I can't " . I guess I just drop those

that are too insenstive, but what does one do with family?

> >

> > End of rant. g* Back to regularly scheduled list.

> >

> > Thanks for putting up with me.

> >

> > Rose

> > ----- Original Message -----

> > From: brightt@l...

> >

> >

> >

> > >>>>>

> >

> >

> >

> > Every once in a while I try to educate someone about what living with

> > RA is like, but they rarely understand. After that day, I thought why

> > worry about it? Why waste my energy unless someone has sincere

> > interest? I'm trying to keep this perspective and just be wryly amused

> > by some of the strange/insensitive/uninformed things people say about

> > RA. Of course, I know this attitude is nearly impossible for those of

> > you who have spouses, children, etc. who aren't understanding. I'm

> > fortunate to live with just my 2 dogs, who really have no opinion about

> > it and are especially loving when I'm in pain.

> >

> > Many good wishes to each one of you brave people.

> >

> > Prakasha

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

nah, no neighbors, when we moved here 16 years ago and our gilrs were little and

hubby got sick, well people found it odd tohave a stay at home dad with 2 very

little girls....and they were not amused by his mental illness. Friendships

became difficult tomaintain while working double shifts every day for so many

years...most of my co workers also worked double shifts so noone ever had time

to be social. Becuz I worked weekends and holidays, too- church sort of fell by

the wayside years ago....we tried to go back, but my sister is so active in the

church, it made us uncomfortable.we tried a different chucrch and the church we

chose was not a good choice, and my mobility difficulties combined with disabled

kids made it really hard to get there regularly.

The good news is I do somehow manage to be pretty independant, I have learned

how to get my wheelchair in and out alone provided my hands are not flaring too

bad....and my electric scooter and I have learned how to combine a walker and

crutches with the wheelchair and scooter to give myself maximum independance....

What I have not yet learned to cope with is my emotions about all of it

regarding the people in my life. I keep trying to figure out just what kind of

monster I could have been. I never did figure it out- most f my youth I spent

taking care of my mom and her twins and then later her baby- even tho she sent

me away at age 12 as she felt I might unduly burden her new husband......

I worked my 2 jobs hours around he hours she needed me to come take care of

her.....and her babies...and later I cared for my own kids around moms

schedule....

Some days I spend more time on a pity pot than others, sadly it seems to me the

times when I come here and post are my worst times...not my better

days....mostly I guess I am scared about my moms safety right now and I am so

asad about my sons eye and my husband scared me being so ill...

Please I do love tohear good things here, I love to hear people being kind,

people helping each other...but- if you are having a hard time.please know I

understand and sympathize.

I loved being a nurse and helping people.I truly loved it. Right now I do not

like who I am this moment......

whiney and self pity....

- In , " Barb K. " <zigerrr@y...> wrote:

>

> I know your situation is not good. I feel so bad and wish that I was there to

help you out. Isn't there anyone who can get to the store for you?? I know you

can't count on your family and you're mom can't take care of herself but do you

have any neighbors, friends, church members, friends of your kids, parents of

friends of your kids that you could ask to do the shopping??

> much love,

> barb k.

>

> dreamer_plus <dreamer_plus@w...> wrote:

> I am still trying to get amused, but it is so hard.....(see my recent previous

posts)

> too often in my world, " people not getting it " tend to help create outright

dangerous situations.......

> and I feel so let down by the people who appear to the rest of the world to be

caring people due to their volunteer wokr or their professions, but who in fact

to me seem to only do things that show up in the public eye and make them seem

like big shot heros.

> Sadly, now that my son is on themend and hubby seems to be getting a tad

stronger and oldest child (bipolar) is resigned to her birthday slipping thru

all the other crisises- I am flaring, my left ankle and right hip----terribly.

My rheumy retired and our docs office has not yet found a replacement....we need

food and groceries in...for all the good it does to need.

> I am having major difficulty being amused, I am stuck right now in resentful,

anger, bitter, disappointed.....

>

>

>

> - In , " rmcg " wrote:

> >

> > Ok, my two and a half cents here.

> > I have had physical difficulties all my life, so I hope that I'm emphatic

with others.

> > However, I do get disgusted with those who have never ever had any physical

problems and no clue whatsoever how hard it can be for those of us who do have

problems.

> > i.e: DH had heart attack. One month later, BIL was harrassing him about

making plans for a cross country driving trip and wanted a committment NOW.

Needless to say, he/we did not go, but BIL still doesn't understand why we

wouldn't go. (even if dh had been in condition,no way would I be able to make

the type of trip BIL would have wanted)

> >

> > That's an extreme example, but I run into it all the time. I wouldn't want

to wish anything on anyone, but I do wish that people would get a minute bit of

understanding when I/we say " I hurt " , or " I can't " . I guess I just drop those

that are too insenstive, but what does one do with family?

> >

> > End of rant. g* Back to regularly scheduled list.

> >

> > Thanks for putting up with me.

> >

> > Rose

> > ----- Original Message -----

> > From: brightt@l...

> >

> >

> >

> > >>>>>

> >

> >

> >

> > Every once in a while I try to educate someone about what living with

> > RA is like, but they rarely understand. After that day, I thought why

> > worry about it? Why waste my energy unless someone has sincere

> > interest? I'm trying to keep this perspective and just be wryly amused

> > by some of the strange/insensitive/uninformed things people say about

> > RA. Of course, I know this attitude is nearly impossible for those of

> > you who have spouses, children, etc. who aren't understanding. I'm

> > fortunate to live with just my 2 dogs, who really have no opinion about

> > it and are especially loving when I'm in pain.

> >

> > Many good wishes to each one of you brave people.

> >

> > Prakasha

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

nah, no neighbors, when we moved here 16 years ago and our gilrs were little and

hubby got sick, well people found it odd tohave a stay at home dad with 2 very

little girls....and they were not amused by his mental illness. Friendships

became difficult tomaintain while working double shifts every day for so many

years...most of my co workers also worked double shifts so noone ever had time

to be social. Becuz I worked weekends and holidays, too- church sort of fell by

the wayside years ago....we tried to go back, but my sister is so active in the

church, it made us uncomfortable.we tried a different chucrch and the church we

chose was not a good choice, and my mobility difficulties combined with disabled

kids made it really hard to get there regularly.

The good news is I do somehow manage to be pretty independant, I have learned

how to get my wheelchair in and out alone provided my hands are not flaring too

bad....and my electric scooter and I have learned how to combine a walker and

crutches with the wheelchair and scooter to give myself maximum independance....

What I have not yet learned to cope with is my emotions about all of it

regarding the people in my life. I keep trying to figure out just what kind of

monster I could have been. I never did figure it out- most f my youth I spent

taking care of my mom and her twins and then later her baby- even tho she sent

me away at age 12 as she felt I might unduly burden her new husband......

I worked my 2 jobs hours around he hours she needed me to come take care of

her.....and her babies...and later I cared for my own kids around moms

schedule....

Some days I spend more time on a pity pot than others, sadly it seems to me the

times when I come here and post are my worst times...not my better

days....mostly I guess I am scared about my moms safety right now and I am so

asad about my sons eye and my husband scared me being so ill...

Please I do love tohear good things here, I love to hear people being kind,

people helping each other...but- if you are having a hard time.please know I

understand and sympathize.

I loved being a nurse and helping people.I truly loved it. Right now I do not

like who I am this moment......

whiney and self pity....

- In , " Barb K. " <zigerrr@y...> wrote:

>

> I know your situation is not good. I feel so bad and wish that I was there to

help you out. Isn't there anyone who can get to the store for you?? I know you

can't count on your family and you're mom can't take care of herself but do you

have any neighbors, friends, church members, friends of your kids, parents of

friends of your kids that you could ask to do the shopping??

> much love,

> barb k.

>

> dreamer_plus <dreamer_plus@w...> wrote:

> I am still trying to get amused, but it is so hard.....(see my recent previous

posts)

> too often in my world, " people not getting it " tend to help create outright

dangerous situations.......

> and I feel so let down by the people who appear to the rest of the world to be

caring people due to their volunteer wokr or their professions, but who in fact

to me seem to only do things that show up in the public eye and make them seem

like big shot heros.

> Sadly, now that my son is on themend and hubby seems to be getting a tad

stronger and oldest child (bipolar) is resigned to her birthday slipping thru

all the other crisises- I am flaring, my left ankle and right hip----terribly.

My rheumy retired and our docs office has not yet found a replacement....we need

food and groceries in...for all the good it does to need.

> I am having major difficulty being amused, I am stuck right now in resentful,

anger, bitter, disappointed.....

>

>

>

> - In , " rmcg " wrote:

> >

> > Ok, my two and a half cents here.

> > I have had physical difficulties all my life, so I hope that I'm emphatic

with others.

> > However, I do get disgusted with those who have never ever had any physical

problems and no clue whatsoever how hard it can be for those of us who do have

problems.

> > i.e: DH had heart attack. One month later, BIL was harrassing him about

making plans for a cross country driving trip and wanted a committment NOW.

Needless to say, he/we did not go, but BIL still doesn't understand why we

wouldn't go. (even if dh had been in condition,no way would I be able to make

the type of trip BIL would have wanted)

> >

> > That's an extreme example, but I run into it all the time. I wouldn't want

to wish anything on anyone, but I do wish that people would get a minute bit of

understanding when I/we say " I hurt " , or " I can't " . I guess I just drop those

that are too insenstive, but what does one do with family?

> >

> > End of rant. g* Back to regularly scheduled list.

> >

> > Thanks for putting up with me.

> >

> > Rose

> > ----- Original Message -----

> > From: brightt@l...

> >

> >

> >

> > >>>>>

> >

> >

> >

> > Every once in a while I try to educate someone about what living with

> > RA is like, but they rarely understand. After that day, I thought why

> > worry about it? Why waste my energy unless someone has sincere

> > interest? I'm trying to keep this perspective and just be wryly amused

> > by some of the strange/insensitive/uninformed things people say about

> > RA. Of course, I know this attitude is nearly impossible for those of

> > you who have spouses, children, etc. who aren't understanding. I'm

> > fortunate to live with just my 2 dogs, who really have no opinion about

> > it and are especially loving when I'm in pain.

> >

> > Many good wishes to each one of you brave people.

> >

> > Prakasha

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >