Re: Re: Residential Schools/Pennsylvania

[Guest guest]

Barbaraa - there was a time that Elie did all that, plus head butting and

socking people. HE also either fan away or did SFD. He ran into streets,

he laid on double yellow lines. Those are safety issues to be sure. But we

didn;t consider residential school - but we did send him to a specialized

school. Home was very difficult from 110-19. We had in home TSS _ but I

fired them . We had habilitation, w/e respite camp and summer camp - those

were life savers. HAd I the money, we would have had more habilitation.

This was a college aged person who took Elie OUT. They did boy/man things.

He was worn out when he came home and much easier to live with!

> **

>

>

> Sara and Donna,

>

> Thanks for the info on PA. My problem with Elliott is hitting, kicking, and

> throwing anything nearby (like rapid fire!!) anytime he doesn't want to do

> something. It can be something minor like sitting down for dinner or going

> potty, but it's particularly bad when trying to get him to school. It takes

> two of us to get him to the bus, and he's hurt aides and others during these

> aggressive episodes. (He's particularly strong and fast!) He also screams

> and cries loudly, so it's become stressful to take him out anywhere. He

> doesn't even want to leave the house for what used to be some of his

> favorite things to do such as basketball and horseback riding.

>

> He was in the Neurobehavioral Unit at Kennedy Krieger for three weeks this

> summer and they're sending a therapist weekly to our home and school so that

> helps, but I'm afraid once he hits puberty, he'll be impossible to handle,

> so I'm trying to figure out other options even though I'd do anything to

> keep him at home. We've tried meds, too, but they don't seem to be working

> at this point. The other issue is the anxiety it's causing my other son.

> So...I can't say it's medically necessary though it's a safety issue.

>

> I appreciate all of the info people on this list provide and the support of

> other moms who really know how difficult life can be at times but how very

> much we love our kids through it all!!

>

> Barbara

> Mom to Elliott, 11

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Barbara,Annie here. I did not know the extent of what you are going through

with sweetie Elliott. I truly hope you find the help you need to keep him

safely with you.It is heart wrenching to have to seek out what options are

there, but it is wise to look ahead of time rather than wait for a crisis and

have to make a quick decision... I have to say, it is a worry to me about the

puberty thing. I know that will be coming soon for Wesley too, and I don't have

a clue how that will be.

There are some communities started by a Catholic guy (I think a monk) Jean

Vanier...I first heard of him from Sherry from this list....I know they have one

of those communities in PA...I have never looked more into it.....I am not

Catholic but if it is a good place and my kid were well cared for and loved then

that is most important to me. I don't know how they operate but just throwing

out the name in case you wanted to look into it....I have held back doing more

research..but we don't know what the future holds so it is good to have some

plans made...my husband and I are 50 and 64 and we don't have any younger

relatives who we would entrust our child's care to ..especiallly when Wes beomes

an adult...

....so difficult to think about...Annie

[Guest guest]

L'Arche is the community. They are all over the country. But and a very

big BUT - they are for adults only. And the communities that I visited -

one in PA and one in DC- there were no people with behavior difficulties.

We are not Catholic but the homes we saw had people of every and no

religious affiliation. Another possibility is CAMPHILL - all over the world

- but there is a community in PA too.

Anne: Start building a community of support. You may want to begin looking

at microboards - started by Ruth Beckwith out of TN, but spreading all over

the country. IT is vital for our kids that they have a community of people

who know themm. One of the reasons we retired to a small community was so

that Elie would be well known and have at least a familiarity to and with

people outside the family. Before we thought any of our children would be

there for Elie, we started building that community starting with the older

college students who worked with him and lived near us.

> **

>

>

>

> Hi Barbara,Annie here. I did not know the extent of what you are going

> through with sweetie Elliott. I truly hope you find the help you need to

> keep him safely with you.It is heart wrenching to have to seek out what

> options are there, but it is wise to look ahead of time rather than wait for

> a crisis and have to make a quick decision... I have to say, it is a worry

> to me about the puberty thing. I know that will be coming soon for Wesley

> too, and I don't have a clue how that will be.

> There are some communities started by a Catholic guy (I think a monk) Jean

> Vanier...I first heard of him from Sherry from this list....I know they have

> one of those communities in PA...I have never looked more into it.....I am

> not Catholic but if it is a good place and my kid were well cared for and

> loved then that is most important to me. I don't know how they operate but

> just throwing out the name in case you wanted to look into it....I have held

> back doing more research..but we don't know what the future holds so it is

> good to have some plans made...my husband and I are 50 and 64 and we don't

> have any younger relatives who we would entrust our child's care to

> ..especiallly when Wes beomes an adult...

> ...so difficult to think about...Annie

>

>

>

>