Guest guest Posted January 24, 2001 Report Share Posted January 24, 2001 I thought about this when I answered, ...really! But her comment was about her husband and that's who I have experience with. I know another family where the husband is the one who is more involved in the child's care related to the disability---and believe me, he feels the same way I do with gender reversed. He was the first person I really could open up to about such things...it was refreshing to talk about it with the gender issue removed. We just talked about actions and responses---not about husbands and wives. It kept it from becoming too stereotypical. It's tough no matter who does what. I'm just thankful one person does something in all the areas! Rex has the job with benefits....I finally found a job that accomodates my need to be overly involved with Andy. The graveyard thing was the pits, though. j At 12:24 AM 1/25/01 +0100, you wrote: >Male coming in, > *I* think you are all sexists !! :-) It's the CAREGIVER, who >always notices things and knows how to treat the child and what works >with them. I know that in our case with Ignacio I was the first one >to notice his ASD, as I was/am the one with him the most, as his mother >in our case *(someone) has to pay the bills right?* as said quite >correctly !!! The main advantage that women have over men in this >aspect is their highly developed sense of intuition *honed* over many >years of practice since their childhood !!! :-):-) > > > > http://www.onelist.com/community/ > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 24, 2001 Report Share Posted January 24, 2001 , You are absolutely right. Mom to 11 --- Carmen Gomez Galan wrote: > Male coming in, > *I* think you are all sexists !! :-) It's > the CAREGIVER, who > always notices things and knows how to treat the > child and what works > with them. I know that in our case with Ignacio I > was the first one > to notice his ASD, as I was/am the one with him the > most, as his mother > in our case *(someone) has to pay the bills right?* > as said quite > correctly !!! The main advantage that women have > over men in this > aspect is their highly developed sense of intuition > *honed* over many > years of practice since their childhood !!! :-):-) > > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 In a message dated 1/24/01 6:45:16 PM Eastern Standard Time, carmabo@... writes: << Male coming in, *I* think you are all sexists !! :-) It's the CAREGIVER, who always notices things and knows how to treat the child and what works with them. I know that in our case with Ignacio I was the first one to notice his ASD, as I was/am the one with him the most, as his mother in our case *(someone) has to pay the bills right?* as said quite correctly !!! The main advantage that women have over men in this aspect is their highly developed sense of intuition *honed* over many years of practice since their childhood !!! :-):-) >> Yikes!!! Sorry if all this sounded like male-bashing . I think it started with (oh gosh....you don't sign your name... having a real problem with her hubby. You are right; typically it IS the caregiver who *gets it* regarding our kids with ASD. However, I'm like CK. Duff is a hands on Dad. He doesn't have a whole lot of choice; we've got five kids and we're extremely busy. Unless someone clones me, he's gotta kick in. I am a stay at home Mom, so it only makes sense that the brunt of it falls on me. That's the deal. And for a long time, Duff couldn't connect with Maddie because first she was nursing 24/7, then onset of autism and she wanted no parts of anybody. Yes, it was me who recognized the autism first, but Duff and I have always been on the same page; even if we don't always agree, we agree to be on the same page with our kids. Sometimes I have to give in, sometimes he does. Maddie has grown so much in the last two years, and one of the wonderful things that have come out of that is her relationship with her Dad. The other day, they were both lying in our bed and Duff leaned in and kissed her and said.. " My Buddy " . It's like she knew what he said. She reached up and hugged him. Almost made me cry. We all work so hard on communication with our kids and we get so caught up in just living. But communication is just as essential in our relationships with our spouses. Even more than average couples, because of what we have to deal with. Duff and I agreed 21 years ago when we got married, that the best gift we could give to our children is the example of a solid relationship. I believe that by nurturing our relationship with each other, we teach our kids how to develop their own sound relationships. Besides, this makes for a good excuse to get wined and dined by your spouse.... Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 In a message dated 1/24/01 7:03:39 PM Eastern Standard Time, jmedlen@... writes: << The graveyard thing was the pits, though. j >> God, I bet Joan. Ten years ago, Duff went back to school full time for his MBA and we all packed up and moved to Boston. It was exciting, scary, terrifying, but mostly incredibly hard. Essentially, I was a single parent for two years. This was all pre-Maddie and pre-Allie; or else I probably would have been put in a straight jacket. Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 In a message dated 1/24/01 11:03:39 PM Eastern Standard Time, smilinggail@... writes: << OOPS!!!!! You're right . It just happens to be the Mom that is usually the main care giver. LOL I must say, I have met a few men lately that are the main care givers and are doing a better job than some women I know. Gosh, some of them cook and clean better too! LOL Now, why wasn't I looking for a man like that when I got married? LOL Gail-who is teaching her daughters what is really important in finding a mate! LOL >> LOL Gail. My SIL has two children and a hubby who is more the caregiver in some respects than her. When my nephew was little, the joke in the family was that had two mothers. Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 In a message dated 1/25/01 8:43:36 AM Eastern Standard Time, duffey48@... writes: << LOL Gail. My SIL has two children and a hubby who is more the caregiver in some respects than her. When my nephew was little, the joke in the family was that had two mothers. Donna >> Donna, I believe the same percentage of men and women are born with the natural instinct to care for their children. I also believe that a larger percentage of men don't want that responsibility! LOL Too tough for most men! LOL I have noticed though, that the men I have seen that are the care givers, they do a really great job at it. :-) I guess it's like anything else, it depends on if you WANT to do it or not. I am a firm believer in that you can learn to do anything, maybe not be the best in the world, but you can learn. But, you will only be good at the things you really enjoy working at to be good at. My husband has mastered the art of nap taking! LOL He works really hard at it and enjoys it. LOL I, on the other hand, don't enjoy trying to get him up, but I am working at it and learning how! LOL Okay, enough husband bashing for today...sorry ! LOL It's just that all husbands are not like you when it comes to the care of their kids. We are a young nation just learning, remember? LOL Gail-off to be the care giver to the kitchen floor, AGAIN!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 In a message dated 1/25/01 10:59:22 AM Eastern Standard Time, smilinggail@... writes: << But, you will only be good at the things you really enjoy working at to be good at. My husband has mastered the art of nap taking! LOL He works really hard at it and enjoys it. >> ROTFLOL Gail!!!! My SIL is real good at that too. Another family joke is " where's Eileen " . The answer... " Horizontal " . LOL Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 In a message dated 1/25/01 12:32:35 PM Eastern Standard Time, jmedlen@... writes: << mcdonalds.... >> LOL Joan. Of course, I forgot. You simply MUST factor in Mcs. Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 good for you speak your mind!! - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 What does an evaluation or dx form Dr. Capone cost. does ins. cover any of this?-- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 What does an evaluation or dx form Dr. Capone cost. does ins. cover any of this?-- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 25, 2001 Report Share Posted January 25, 2001 probably around $500 by now. My insurance covered some of it after I paid a bunch in deductible. We saw more than Dr. Capone...slp, AAC, psych, OT, behaviorist....mcdonalds.... At 10:10 AM 1/25/01 -0500, you wrote: >What does an evaluation or dx form Dr. Capone cost. does ins. cover any >of this?-- > > > http://www.onelist.com/community/ > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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