RE: After puberty onset, boys, behavior, sleep issues

[Guest guest]

Hi Holly:

I can tell you what works for us but I don't know if it will work for Jake.

I was thinking about this very issue this morning - but in part because the

cold, gray days are starting to get monotonous and neither Isaac or Tony

wanted to go to school this morning.

So Tony's way of dealing with puberty is to try and be more independent. We

try to give him this room but many times when we hear noises from the

kitchen we yell from where ever we are (because we are so sophisticated in

this house) " Tony do not make more coffee! " Tony has decided that he likes

coffee and wants to walk around drinking it. He can almost make it by

himself but not quite and there have been many messes in the kitchen. There

are other activities like coffee - usually kitchen related that he will try

to do by himself. If he wants me to make him pancakes he will get out all

the ingredients, the pan, and have everything waiting for me. I have

stopped him in the nick of time from cracking eggs in the bowl - though he

would really like to do this. We try not to yell at him about these

initiatives and explain that there needs to be an adult in the kitchen or we

say it either is or isn't time for pancakes. We still do 1-2-3 magic and on

a 3, he will get a job if he persists in his endeavors. I have also been

trying to put more responsibility for his decisions on him, I will say " you

need to find something else to do or I will find it for you! " And if he

doesn't find something acceptable, I will find something for him.

He also wants to watch TV more but we don't let him. The boys are allowed

to watch PBS for an hour after school and then there is no TV until Isaac

has his homework done and Tony has read me a book. Tony's reading is around

the 1st grade level where it has been since 1st grade. He can read any

flash card but put flash cards in a sentence and he has trouble. We plod

along with beginning readers that are at a beginning 1st grade level. I

don't know why he can read any flash card (up to a 5th grade level) but

cannot read sentences.

We also have the mini-trampoline in the living room. This is how Isaac

regulates his behavior. He has to have his mini-trampoline. After many

cheap ones, last winter we broke down and bought an expensive one. Isaac

jumps really high and he is tall so we are just waiting for the need for a

higher ceiling.

Our puberty strategy is - there is an expected schedule at home and there

are outlets for physical energy. Both boys are in Special Olympics

basketball but only Isaac will compete. Tony will do practices but is

afraid to play in a game. He is not very coordinated but loves coming along

for the ride and he will now play basketball with us in the driveway so

there is progress. Cute as a button but not the athlete Isaac is.

I have also been more willing to take them bowling - a hobby they picked up

through Special Olympics. I'm not such a fan of bowling but I can tell that

with Tony, it makes him feel like a big boy and so we have been doing it. I

don't let them use bumpers so they have to work at the game and they are

quite happy with this. They got new bowling balls for Christmas. It is

difficult to find coupons for bowling though.

Rigidity at home and more social outings is important for us during this

puberty time. I can't tell if we are in the middle of it or just starting

out. Isaac physically developed early, Tony is way behind. He still has a

little boy body. Isaac is way tall and Tony is short. They are both normal

in weight with little body fat.

Prozac (the generic fluexetine) seemed to really help Isaac. Tony is on it

but I can't tell if it works for him. He really started talking when we

started the Ginko Biloba.

Helping each boy find a hobby has helped as well. If Isaac isn't playing a

computer game he is coloring his mandalas. He likes to make things

multi-colored. We are trying to help him shape this hobby into drawing

and/or coloring real pictures but it is slow going. Tony's hobby for the

moment is writing down the names of everyone in the family and all the

characters from Curious . He will ask me to make him a list of

" everybody's names. I need everybody's names. " Then he will copy this

list. We can do this several times a day. His handwriting is getting

better but I'm not sure what else he gets from this. It just makes him

happy.

Lori

Mom to Isaac 14 and Tony 12

_____

From: [mailto: ] On Behalf

Of giglho

Sent: Monday, January 24, 2011 8:55 AM

To:

Subject: After puberty onset, boys, behavior, sleep issues

Jake is now in full blown puberty mode. We have noticed that he wants to be

in his room and watching videos more, and he is not sleeping as well. He

either doesn't go to sleep or wakes up at 3:00 in the morning. We are using

risperidone and focalin XR at this point but I don't know that they are

working anymore. Thinking we are heading for a long road of uncertainty and

not liking the thought of it.

Any recommendations from the boys club?

Holly

Idaho

Jake 11, DS/Autism

[Guest guest]

My old favorite is still Benedryl - if that doesn't work, some of the old

antihistamines like Chlortrimeton also induce sleepiness.

>

>

> Jake is now in full blown puberty mode. We have noticed that he wants to be

> in his room and watching videos more, and he is not sleeping as well. He

> either doesn't go to sleep or wakes up at 3:00 in the morning. We are using

> risperidone and focalin XR at this point but I don't know that they are

> working anymore. Thinking we are heading for a long road of uncertainty and

> not liking the thought of it.

> Any recommendations from the boys club?

> Holly

> Idaho

> Jake 11, DS/Autism

>

>

>

--

Sara- different pathways lead to Nirvana.

[Guest guest]

Thank Lori,

I do think lack of activity is part of the problem. We now live in Idaho and it

is colder than I can even tell you. Everything is frozen outside so playing in

our yard or even in the cul de sac is not possible. We used to have a swing but

the way our home is built we have yet to figure out how to get anything hung.

We are missing Tumbletown and some of the things we used to do in PA. Even

going out to eat is difficult because the only place that has playgrounds are

places Jake cannot eat. There is no chick fil a here and that really hurts our

outings! LOL.

I wonder if his medicine is still working. I am attempting to decrease his

risperdone because he was drooling excessively and it takes him forever to start

urinating when he goes to the bathroom. Both of these things were items dr.

Capone had warned me about.

Jake has become way more obsessive with things. Not necessarily items but when

he wants something and he doesn't get it, he does not let it go. It doesn't

matter if it is a glass of milk, juice, popcorn, hotdogs, dvd, etc. He does not

take no for an answer. When we stick to our guns, we are the one that pays the

price. He can ask every 30 secs to 2 minutes for hours! And I mean hours on

hours on hours. It is overwhelming.

I definitely miss my behavior team. The school here is still figuring him out.

I don't have a behavior specialist, or a doctor who is used to someone like

Jake.

I guess to start I need to increase his activity. I am also considering not

allowing him his dvd prior to sleeping. He has always watched his video for

maybe 30 minutes tops, then he tells us he is done, we remove it from his room

and he goes right to sleep. This is not happening anymore. Urgh! This all

sucks!

Thanks for your thoughts. I will defintely work on some of suggestions.

Holly

[Guest guest]

Have you thought of switching him to some favorite soothing CD music?

Without the flickering light he may get to sleep easier.

>

>

> Thank Lori,

> I do think lack of activity is part of the problem. We now live in Idaho

> and it is colder than I can even tell you. Everything is frozen outside so

> playing in our yard or even in the cul de sac is not possible. We used to

> have a swing but the way our home is built we have yet to figure out how to

> get anything hung.

>

> We are missing Tumbletown and some of the things we used to do in PA. Even

> going out to eat is difficult because the only place that has playgrounds

> are places Jake cannot eat. There is no chick fil a here and that really

> hurts our outings! LOL.

>

> I wonder if his medicine is still working. I am attempting to decrease his

> risperdone because he was drooling excessively and it takes him forever to

> start urinating when he goes to the bathroom. Both of these things were

> items dr. Capone had warned me about.

>

> Jake has become way more obsessive with things. Not necessarily items but

> when he wants something and he doesn't get it, he does not let it go. It

> doesn't matter if it is a glass of milk, juice, popcorn, hotdogs, dvd, etc.

> He does not take no for an answer. When we stick to our guns, we are the one

> that pays the price. He can ask every 30 secs to 2 minutes for hours! And I

> mean hours on hours on hours. It is overwhelming.

>

> I definitely miss my behavior team. The school here is still figuring him

> out. I don't have a behavior specialist, or a doctor who is used to someone

> like Jake.

>

> I guess to start I need to increase his activity. I am also considering not

> allowing him his dvd prior to sleeping. He has always watched his video for

> maybe 30 minutes tops, then he tells us he is done, we remove it from his

> room and he goes right to sleep. This is not happening anymore. Urgh! This

> all sucks!

>

> Thanks for your thoughts. I will defintely work on some of suggestions.

> Holly

>

>

>

--

Sara- different pathways lead to Nirvana.

[Guest guest]

Holly our 13 year old started with some of the same behaviors

you are describing about two years ago. He also got pubic hair,

under arm hair and acne. Funny how that was not delayed:)

also picked up what mimic OCD behaviors he gets fixated on

something. Right now it is water and slamming doors and cabinets. I

dont really have any advice except some moms and Drs. we have talked

to said it does get better after they go through puberty?? I have

heard from other moms with older boys that this was the hardest time

for their child and them. Also with the cold we are having it is

harder to keep them active outside.

> Thank Lori,

> I do think lack of activity is part of the problem. We now live in

> Idaho and it is colder than I can even tell you. Everything is

> frozen outside so playing in our yard or even in the cul de sac is

> not possible. We used to have a swing but the way our home is built

> we have yet to figure out how to get anything hung.

>

> We are missing Tumbletown and some of the things we used to do in

> PA. Even going out to eat is difficult because the only place that

> has playgrounds are places Jake cannot eat. There is no chick fil a

> here and that really hurts our outings! LOL.

>

> I wonder if his medicine is still working. I am attempting to

> decrease his risperdone because he was drooling excessively and it

> takes him forever to start urinating when he goes to the bathroom.

> Both of these things were items dr. Capone had warned me about.

>

> Jake has become way more obsessive with things. Not necessarily

> items but when he wants something and he doesn't get it, he does

> not let it go. It doesn't matter if it is a glass of milk, juice,

> popcorn, hotdogs, dvd, etc. He does not take no for an answer.

> When we stick to our guns, we are the one that pays the price. He

> can ask every 30 secs to 2 minutes for hours! And I mean hours on

> hours on hours. It is overwhelming.

>

> I definitely miss my behavior team. The school here is still

> figuring him out. I don't have a behavior specialist, or a doctor

> who is used to someone like Jake.

>

> I guess to start I need to increase his activity. I am also

> considering not allowing him his dvd prior to sleeping. He has

> always watched his video for maybe 30 minutes tops, then he tells

> us he is done, we remove it from his room and he goes right to

> sleep. This is not happening anymore. Urgh! This all sucks!

>

> Thanks for your thoughts. I will defintely work on some of

> suggestions.

> Holly

>

>

[Guest guest]

Gave jake some melatonin last night and he actually slept all night, I woke him

this morning.

yesterday he came home counting. He counted for at least 15 minutes. I even

video taped it because it was so unusual.

Today, he bite his aid and threw a chair. Urgh!

I have started lowering his Risperdal mostly because he was drooling so much it

was gross. So far, there doesn't seem to be much change with the exception of

less drool.

We go to the new neurologist on Thursday. Hopeing that maybe they will finally

do an eeg and make sure that all his little quirks are not little seizures.

Holly