RE: Back to Lori

[Guest guest]

Lori, my daughter and I were actually choking back tears. I also invited Zeb's

former ed consultant, a dear friend to Zeb and me. She is partially responsible

for shaping Zeb to be who he is today. I wanted her to see that Zeb was an

accepted member of his team and witness inclusion at it's best. I sort of think

that Zeb may have decided to make this speech because of her presence. Zeb

wasn't always this independent and does have anxiety issues as a result of nasty

school situations. He has been able to move on with time. Zeb's independence is

a work in progress and will continue throughout his life. Some days are better

than others but last night was the best yet. Yes, it did make the sleepless

nights worthwhile and will give me the strength to deal with this nasty group in

another IEP meeting on Friday. I am happy that Isaac's team is seeing the light.

Just maybe you need to constantly remind them of his difficult start in life and

tug on those heart

strings. Anything is worth a try that does no harm. Your boys sound like great

kids.

Charlyne

Mom to Zeb 17 DS

Subject: RE: Back to Charlyne

To:

Date: Monday, December 6, 2010, 10:56 AM

 

Oh my gosh Charlyne, I got tears in my eyes just reading your post. Did

you

cry through the whole thing? Yea Zeb!!!!

I think the difference between Zeb and Isaac is that I still can't just drop

Isaac off as you were able to do with Zeb. Granted Zeb is a few years older

and I hope to someday be able to do that with Isaac. It was the point at

the IEP team that made a difference today and hopefully put us all back on

the right track. For whatever reason, Isaac has to have an adult be

responsible for him. He needs it or the anxiety he gets lead to impulsive

behavior - like taking someone else's pencil or whatever. I kept telling

the school and today they finally got it that he is very confusing to work

with because he is so high functioning and yet he needs a person responsible

for him. The more his needs are met, the more mature he becomes and the

more he can handle independence. They were even a tiny bit (but just a tiny

bit) apologetic about taking away his supports. I always try to give them a

face saving way out of the situation so today I reminded them that he was

conceived by two crack addicted individuals - long time users and so his

needs are unique. Which got them all excited again about doing good for

him. I don't know why.

But I am delighted to hear your story about Zeb and I hope it did make all

the sleepless nights you endured worth it. Everyone needs an opportunity to

shine and I am so glad, relieved and proud of our families when they make it

happen for their kids.

Lori

Mom to Isaac 13, and Tony 12

Home with sick boys today but hopefully the last day!

_____

From: [mailto: ] On Behalf

Of charlyne1121

Sent: Monday, December 06, 2010 12:48 AM

To:

Subject: Lori/Desi/ school

Lori,

I certainly hope Isaac begins to feel better soon. Zeb has also has used the

phrase " I'm going to kill you " at school too. Unfortunately he was suspended

for many days. He didn't mean it literally and there was no intent. The

school staff were well aware that Zeb said it as a phrase but nevertheless

they could suspend him for it. It was easier to get rid of a sped kid for a

few days. Some school staff are not exactly kind to Zeb because is the only

student with ID included in general classes in his high school. They are not

exactly pleased that he isn't in the life skills classes as the other sped

students. It takes more work to modify the curriculum especially for one

student. Zeb was happy to be home. You can formally file the team requesting

that Isaac not be suspended because the speech is directly related to his

disability which would then become a 504 accommodation. Zeb has not been

suspended for that phrase since and he rarely says it.

Desi,

I am happy to hear that Aubrey did so well at her concert.It was her night

and she enjoyed every minute of it. It's not often that are kids have the

opportunity to shine and it makes all our hard work worth it just for those

few minutes. Why was her name not included on the program?

Tonight I went to Zeb's soccer banquet. He is in his senior year and this

was the last time he will be included in a sports activity with his team.

Soccer is finished for the year. Zeb has been the manager of the varsity

soccer team for the past 2 yrs. The coach called each team member to stand

next to him while he talked about their athletic accomplishments. They all

received various awards. The coach called Zeb and he proudly stood next to

the coach. Zeb does not play so I wasn't certain what the coach was going to

say about him. He began by saying that Zeb has made him better as a coach

and he has changed each of the players lives and their families. The team

was fortunate to have Zeb enrich their lives and was a great manager. Coach

gave Zeb a trophy and a boxed gift. Zeb shook his hand and thanked him. To

my surprise, Zeb took the microphone and made a speech that was beyond

anything that I could imagine he could do. He talked about the coach leading

the team on a good path, using those exact words. He was thankful to be

given the opportunity to be the manager for these past few years. He was

grateful that his teammates believed in his ability and for their

friendships. He thanked the parents for all the good pasta dinners and

including him in the poker games. I didn't know Zeb even played poker. He

got a standing ovation. Zeb's teammates and many of the parents high fived

and hugged him before we left. It was Zeb's night! For all the difficulty

keeping Zeb included throughout the years, it made it all worth while.

Charlyne

Mom to Zeb 17 DS