Re: Re: Can I please vent..if only for a moment...? (Christian content)

[Guest guest]

Hearing that " God won't give you more than you can bear " and having I

Corinthians 10:13 used to " prove " that ( " God is faithful, he will not let you be

tempted beyond what you can bear . . . " ) really annoys me sometimes, because

like you, I also think it's related to sin/temptation and not necessarily to

life circumstances that aren't sinful (like having a special needs child).  The

context is talking about " if you think you are standing firm, be careful you

don't fall " .

Do I believe God helps us?  Yes.  But I'm not so sure that he will allow no

more than we can humanly bear.  JMHO.

Tina

Hacker:   " Any last words before I throw you in the dungeon? "

Digit:   " Yeah.  We're outta here! "

--From Cyberchase

Nuclear option in 2010, Betsy Ray/Tacy in 2012!

Can I please vent..if only for a moment...?

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> I sincerely hope I do not offend anyone with what I NEED to say, but I hope

> that you all may at one time or another been there and know that there are

> days when we just feel hopeless, tired, and alone.

> I am fairly new to the group and I had come across someones post

> " complaining " about not being able to travel, etc. I'd like to first

> apolgize to that person for my judging them (personally, in the privacy of

> my own home, but never the less still judging them.)

> I truly believe that we have all been there...thinking of our futures, of

> what could have been or may be,

> A few weeek ago when I joined I told everyone that I am a mother of 4. The

> second born, who is 7 is our precious boy with ds. I was 24 when was

> conceived. 25 when he was born. I knew about when I was 5 months

> pregnant. I was scared, I didnt know much if anything about ds or any other

> condition. As a lot of us think...it will never happen to me. Out of sight,

> out of mind.

> However, coming from a christian background and a divorced family I have

> always been a fighter. Looking at the positive things in life and nurturing

> that.

> After a few days of self pity, I started researching everything and anything

> to do with ds. I read EVERY available book in the library, made calls,

> connections, etc. I felt prepared and ready to help my child achieve his

> potential. After all, I thought, they are known to be caring and loving.

> After he was born I was determined to get him into all therapies, prgrams

> available. I joined local parent gropus, attended seminars and seeked out

> the local pediatrician known to deal with special needs children with a

> compassionate attitude.

> But,...things changed. My once smiling caring, giggling toddler was gone.

> His sparkling eyes now tend to just stare out in space...I felt/feel grief

> for my little boy. Dont get me wrong, I do not love him any less. If

> anything I love him that much more, but I cant help but feel " cheated " . I

> accepted the ds diagnosis. I was positive and dreamt of his bright future, I

> did not however, think this would happen,

> It has been a year since his dx, but it still hurts. I still feel alone and

> feel that I need to do more to help him. I am still a member of our local ds

> group. They just sent me a link of pics from the ds meeting they attended in

> Orlando. As I browsed the 200+ ics posted I first smiled seeing their

> participation, but the smiles turned to tears...thinking to myself, " its not

> fair " , " thats what I thought it would be like. I expected delays but I also

> expected him to be part of a special group, one who he could bond and feel a

> part of. I dod not expect him to prefer to be alone in his dark closet

> rather than playing with his sibligs. I did not expect to miss his smile and

> warm eyes, the connection....

> What is hard is not being able to voice me feelings with anyone, Rather

> keeping them bottled pretending to be strong only to crumble into sobs at

> night when everyone is asleep. This is when I think, :its not fair " \

> Thanks to all who read this. Sorry it was so long but if I cant talk, themn

> at least I write...I need to just....sigh and let it ou.

> Good night to all and God bless....

> Jenn

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