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So depressed today

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Hello all. I am feeling so bad and depressed today, I just don't know what

to do. Seems like everyday my joints hurt worse and worse. And this is a

new illness for me. My feet are so swollen, I can only wear flip flops when

I go out, and large house shoes when I am at home. Normally I would wear a

small, but smalls don't even go on my feet. I don't see how people who have

been suffering from this disease is able to tolerate it. I do take pain meds

because of a chronic back problem, but the meds do nothing for the joint

pain. Today I am hurting so bad that I am just sitting here crying. I am so

depressed. When I think how bad I hurt now, it is so hard for me to imagine

living the rest of my life like this.

I go to see a rheumatologist for the first time on Sept. 20. I hope he can

help me. I also see my pain doc on Tuesday and I sure hope he knows of

something to give me that will help this kind of pain.

Thanks everyone for letting me cry on your shoulders. Sometimes your the

only shoulders I have to cry on.

Hugs

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