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I have 4 boys with autism and the behaviors you describe sounds alot like my 14 year old, classic Aspergers. He was first diagnosed with ADHD, and then later with Aspergers. Hope this helped. If you need more info, just ask. Alot of people here are willing to jump in and help in any way. Also feel free to email me personally. Sharon(moderator)

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Hi Sam,

Have you discovered the OASIS website? It has loads of info on Aspergers and

might be helpful to you:

http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/

You need to get your son assessed (I think in the States you would start

with a paediatrician, here in England you would go to your GP). The sooner

you can get a definite diagnosis, the sooner you can start with appropriate

interventions, although do be aware that there are many out there who will

offer you a 'cure' or the chance to make your son 'normal', but they cannot.

in England

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Sam,

Welcome, I hope you will find this group helpful. I know I have!

I would recommend getting a comprehensive evaluation for your son. Many of

his behaviors sound typical for AS, and the sooner you can start therapies

to help him, the better. But, do some research before you take him to a

psych. Find one that is knowledgeable about autistic spectrum disorders.

Over the years, I have had doctors who have told me my son is fine and I

worry too much, a doctor who recommended I take parenting classes (I have

TAUGHT parenting classes!!!), one doctor who changed his diagnosis when I

mentioned my son wanted to make friends with another boy at school. He said

" Aspergers kids don't make friends, so I gues he is not Aspergers after

all. " I found out later that one of the features of Aspergers is a desire

to make friends but an inability to know how to!!! His teachers at school

(a school that specializes in autistic spectrum disorders) say he is almost

a textbook case of Aspergers and are amazed it took so long to get him a

diagnosis. There is a lot of misconceptions about AS out in the medical

community, so make sure you find one who understands!!

>> 1) Fascination with cars makes and models; i.e. consistently

> questions me about purchasing a new car. Insists that he sits in a

> certain way in the car, so that he can see the steering wheel/gear

> shift.

My son went through that when he was 4 (he is 8 now). He scared us a few

times when he insisted on bending down near a moving car to try and see the

gear shaft move! Over the years my son's fascinations have included: trains

(but NOT - trains should NOT have faces according to him!!!),

construction trucks, gears, the Titanic, cruise ships, and currently,

sailing ships. The difference between AS and normal childhood interests is

the degree to which the topic consumes him. My son will live, eat and

breathe his current obsession. He will talk of nothing else for months,

even years. We will buy books, models, do internet research, take him to

museums, the works. Then, suddenly, it will be over and he will move on to

a new topic.

> 2)Has trouble with story comprehension (explaining/understanding

> plots, difficulty communicating clearly).

Typically, AS kids do have trouble in this area. My son actually has

excellent comprehension on stories he hears, but not on stories he reads

himself.

>

> 3)Has had stereotypies since he was one years old. These can be

> described as odd behavior consisting of being lost in a trance of

> pacing back and forth with heavy breathing and pulling the collar of

> his shirt. We either have to repeat a call to him 2-3 times or shout

> to get his attention when he is in this pacing, trance-like state.

> He used to do this primarily when he had downtime, was bored or

> tired; but in recent months he is doing this outside of these times.

Yep, that sounds like AS too. My son used to roll toy trucks back and

forth, back and forth. We worried he was deaf when he was two because he

never responded to his name. He also smells his arm when he is agitated.

>

> 4)Exhibits extreme boredom, laziness with athletic/sports-related

> activities such as bike riding, running, Kiddie

> Karate/tumbling/soccer. Does not pay attention to coach/treacher. He

> seems to have little tone in his wrists, is sluggish.

My son wants NOTHING to do with team sports. He does like to ride a tandem

bike with his dad, but does not have the balance to ride solo. I would

suggest a consultation with a good Occupational Therapist knowledgeble about

Sensory Integration Dysfunction. It did a world of good for our son.

>

> 5)He is crying more and more when something does not go his way. We

> are trying to teach him to talk it out, but it's an uphill battle.

" use you words " We must say that a dozen times a day to our son. It will

get better with time and patience. Also, most 4-5 year olds go through a

period of crying to try and get their way. That is actually a pretty normal

developmental stage. I teach kindergarten and see it a lot! Don't give in,

no matter how hard it is, and this too, shall pass!!!

>

> 6)Not very physically affectionate.

My son loves to " cuddle, " and sit on my lap ( he is physically small for his

age, so able to still do that :)). He hates to kiss or be kissed. When he

was 4, he hated to cuddle or be held. Even as a baby, he only wanted to be

held when he nursed. Our occupational therapist had us do a brushing

therapy when he was 5. Before he could not stand to be touched, would wear

only sweats and t-shirts, and screamed bloody murder at bathtime. We did it

for two years (every two hours.......) and it worked wonders.

> Does anyone recognize these behaviors in your young child? My

> husband and I wonder if he may have more of an attention-deficit

> disorder problem. In math and especially reading/spelling he is

> clearly ahead of his peers; but we fear his academic promise will go

> down the drain because of these issues.

AS kids are often ahead of their peers academically. My son is all over the

map there. Two years ahead in math, but nearly a year delayed in reading.

Because of his social issues and sensory difficulties, he can not attend

regular school, even though he is " smart " enough to go there. He attends a

private special ed school where he is thriving!

> Also, if anyone has any

> suggestions for therapy, social activities, medication or anything

> else, that would be much appreciated.

My son takes Ritalin to help him focus at school (7.5mg twice a day). I

highly recommend the Feingold Diet www.feingold.org This is a diet that

eliminates artificial colors, flavors, preservatives and salycilites. It

has made a huge difference in our whole family. Not only has it helped our

son's behavior and academics improve, my NT daughter's migraines have all

but disappeared and my allergies are much improved!!

Good luck. You have come to the right place. We have all been there!!!

Debi

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per_dev_dis wrote:

> Hi,

> We have a 4 1/2 year-old son who we believe has Aspergers. It seems

> to wax and wane. For a time we thought he was developing normally,

> but for several months now he seems to be stuck in a concerning

> pattern of behavior which includes:

What's going on here is what I call " evincing. " He's been AS all along,

but he's reached the end of the coping mechanisms he's developed to get

along up to this point.

> 1) Fascination with cars makes and models; i.e. consistently

> questions me about purchasing a new car. Insists that he sits in a

> certain way in the car, so that he can see the steering wheel/gear

> shift.

Ah, yes. The " area of expertise. " :) Our Louie (24, HFA/AS) threw his

first interest into almanacs. Then it was television programs and

channels (satellite, cable, foreign and domestic). That one has pretty

much stuck, and there isn't anything the guy doesn't know about TV

programs; he's got a TV Guide collection that goes back to the 60's that

goes along with this one. A side interest is Pokemon and anime in

general. And, in his teens, he developed a penchant for researching

things. Anything that took his fancy he would research until he knew

all there was to know about it. The development of one or several

" areas of expertise " is very typical of both High Functioning Autism and

Asperger's Syndrome.

> 2)Has trouble with story comprehension (explaining/understanding

> plots, difficulty communicating clearly).

That's because fiction is subjective. It deals with elements in human

interaction that he may well have difficulty understanding. Also, a lot

of our guys have a problem with cause and effect, and most fiction is a

bubbling sea of cause and effect. Not to mention having to understand

the feelings of others, when it's hard enough to label your own so you

can deal with them. :)

> 3)Has had stereotypes since he was one years old. These can be

> described as odd behavior consisting of being lost in a trance of

> pacing back and forth with heavy breathing and pulling the collar of

> his shirt. We either have to repeat a call to him 2-3 times or shout

> to get his attention when he is in this pacing, trance-like state.

> He used to do this primarily when he had downtime, was bored or

> tired; but in recent months he is doing this outside of these times.

We used to call this " deep space " when Louie did it. The trance thing,

that is. Louie didn't pace, he just sat and stared while humming. I

think it was his way of centering himself in his own body and in the

world, as well as taking a break. Remember, those things that come

effortlessly to we neurotypical (NT) folks, like dealing with one

another and with the world as it is, are things that a lot of our guys

have to learn like you would learn Spanish. It's a different language

for our guys, our NT culture is largely incomprehensible to them without

study and learning about it (as you would learn about, say, Latvia), and

sometimes you just need a break from it all. I wish I could take a

vacation in my mind like our son does. :)

> 4)Exhibits extreme boredom, laziness with athletic/sports-related

> activities such as bike riding, running, Kiddie

> Karate/tumbling/soccer. Does not pay attention to coach/treacher. He

> seems to have little tone in his wrists, is sluggish.

This may not be laziness. This may be a fear of failing, for one thing.

The things you list are very difficult for some of our guys (not all

of them; atypicality, thy name is autism). Louie, for example, didn't

learn to pedal until he was in his late teens. He has no problem

running (he does Special Olympic track & field), but some autistic

people I've talked to have a real problem with having their feet off the

ground for that long. And Louie has told us that no way would he ever

go on a trampoline; too scary, sez he. Coordination is a problem for a

lot of our guys too. Perhaps he pays no attention to his coach because

he's already convinced himself that this stuff is beyond him. Have you

thought about things like swimming, that are lower stress and less

competitive? You might look at the Special Olympics program too; maybe

he's just in the wrong peer group. (Our son doesn't hang out with that

many NT people; most of his friends are autistic).

> 5)He is crying more and more when something does not go his way. We

> are trying to teach him to talk it out, but it's an uphill battle.

I think that must be the toughest thing we parents go through. That is,

when it becomes plain that our child is realizing him/herself that they

are different from others. And when the frustration of something going

wrong that was all thought out ahead of time hits, well, ya cry

sometimes. Doesn't mean he's spoiled. It means he has very little

understanding of how our world works. I don't know how you fix this,

other than helping your kid develop callouses on the part that " no " hits.

> 6)Not very physically affectionate.

He may well have tactile issues. Does he have trouble with the tags in

the back of his shirt? Does he " stiffen up " when you hug him? You

might want to look into his tactile sensitivity.

> Does anyone recognize these behaviors in your young child? My

> husband and I wonder if he may have more of an attention-deficit

> disorder problem. In math and especially reading/spelling he is

> clearly ahead of his peers; but we fear his academic promise will go

> down the drain because of these issues. Also, if anyone has any

> suggestions for therapy, social activities, medication or anything

> else, that would be much appreciated.

Math, reading, and spelling are all quantifiable. That is, they are not

subjective, so there's no insight to make. Louie had no trouble with

academic subjects either.....until he was asked to write about what he

had read. That was a real problem, and we just about never got through

it. But asked questions on something non-fiction he'd read? Not a

problem; it was just facts, ma'am. :)

You need to get a firm diagnosis from a psychologist or neurologist so

that you can get an IEP (Individual Educational Plan) in place. The IEP

will, ideally, address the academic things your son has to do in a way

that will facilitate his doing those things. You should also make sure

your child sees a psychologist to talk things through, one with

experience in autism and autistics. Sometimes, just getting along in

the NT world causes problems for our guys, and it's nice to have a place

where you can go talk about it with someone who understands. You will

also want to connect with a physical therapist to help with coordination

(the gym stuff) and tactile issues if indeed he has them. It doesn't

look as though his behavior is a problem, so a behavioral therapist

wouldn't be necessary to you. :) There is no medication that will make

these things go away. There are, however, meds that will lessen anxiety

and like that. However, drs. don't like to prescribe them to kids as

young as your guy (unlike when Louie was first diagnosed, in '82). You

may want to keep them in mind for much further down the road; you never

know. ;)

BTW, I'm Annie! I'm 56, been married 30 years to my dh Ron (54), and

live in Albuquerque NM. Our two are Kris, 35, ADHD (adult dx) and

living in Arizona, and Louie, 24, HFA/AS (dx at 2.5), who lives in an

assisted living house with 2 roomies (also autistic) not far from us.

Oh, and Chuckles, an extremely mouthy conure (small parrot, like ie

in the movie) who claims he belongs to my husband, and a tank full of

guppies who don't say much at all. :)

Nice to meetcha!

Annie, who loves ya annie@...

--

We have enough youth .... How about a fountain of smart? -- Skoge

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I really appreciate yours and others' helpful insights and am happy

that this discussion group exists so that parents can share

experiences.

> But, do some research before you take him to a

> psych. Find one that is knowledgeable about autistic spectrum

disorders.

I would describe our initial visit with a behavioral specialist (MD)

at Childrens' National Medical Center as fair. Her diagnosis was

mild Aspergers. But I left this first appt. at the specialist's

office feeling like while the Dr. had experience with AS, she was

not an expert. She handed us two articles about AS, and told us to

make a followup appt. in 9 months. My husband, who's a general

pediatrician, suggests we should go for the followup. Should I

search the internet for

a true PDD/Aspergers specialist in our area? If so, how?

>I would

> suggest a consultation with a good Occupational Therapist

knowledgeble about

> Sensory Integration Dysfunction. It did a world of good for our

son.

What does this type of therapy consist of?

> the Feingold Diet www.feingold.org

Thanks, I'll check it out.

~Sam

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