Guest guest Posted July 10, 2004 Report Share Posted July 10, 2004 Hi. Worse than having other kids not wanting to play with ours is that some of the parents don't want them to play together. Down at my parents house (abt 40 blocks from mine) is a nice family with a nice home and I know the father from growing up. The boys are about the same age as Sky and the Mother has told the kids (in front of Sky) that she doesn't want her kids playing with him. Sky won't even venture down that direction any longer. When we drive by (they live on the corner) and we have to stop for traffic, both the boys and the daughter all are screaming Hi to Sky and waiving at him. Sky is very active and she wants her kids all calm and quiet. Yes Sky has talked back to me in front of her (telling me NO he didn't want to go home). I agree with you that I wouldn't change Skylar for anything and I love him to pieces. I just believe that I'm glad for what I have cause things could always be worse. Sharon in So Jersey Mom to Skylar 9 Aspergers/ADHD/and other traits > >Reply-To: autism-aspergers >To: <autism-aspergers > >Subject: RE: RE: Telling my son he is autistic >Date: Fri, 9 Jul 2004 08:02:18 -0400 > >Rabecca ... I enjoyed reading your post ... your son seems alot like mine >although is only 5. He quizes me too .. not with college text books >though! hhahahaha I'm sure that's coming! > >When the doctor first told me he suspected AS a few weeks ago, I cried, >sobbed like a baby for two days. Then I thought " what is so bad about >being so smart? " Yes, has some socialization issues and will need me >to help him find the balance in life but thankfully we've recognized early >on that somethings up. I do not think of it as a disability albeit he's >not in school yet and I'm not sure what will happen then ... > >So he can't ride a bike. Isn't interested in team sports. He's a loving >little boy who brightens my everyday. I wouldn't change him for anything. >I like the way you have looked at all the positives with AS .. there are >alot. I'd take this over hyperactivity anyday ... you should see my 2 year >old LOL ... trust me, AS isn't so bad! ha! > >How does Tyler do with socialization? I hope and pray fits in at >school ... what a heartbreak for any mother to have the kids be mean to >their child. The thought of someone calling my son a wierdo makes my skin >crawl. > >Kathy > > Telling my son he is autistic > >Hello, > >My eleven year old son is very high functioning autistic. We have >never told him that there is anything wrong with him. He >understands that he has certain limitations but I have never told >him that he has a permanent disability. When he was diagnosed at >age 4, the doctors told us there was nothing we could do to help him >(they labeled him severe) and the experience was so bad that we >never went back. Now, I've decided to take him to local medical >practitioner who follows the DAN protocol. In the course of this, >he will ask questions and I will have to find a way to answer them. >I was wondering if anyone on this list has crossed this bridge and >if you would be willing to share your experience. > >Thanks, > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 11, 2004 Report Share Posted July 11, 2004 ....and we wonder why some kids are so intollerant and inflexable??? It is wonderful that the kids still shout and wave to your son, because so many follow in their parents' footsteps!!! ~hugs~ Rabecca <<Worse than having other kids not wanting to play with ours is that some > of the parents don't want them to play together. >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 11, 2004 Report Share Posted July 11, 2004 I think the blessing with my son is that he doesn't really understand when the other kids are picking on him, and he thinks he has no friends (not that he really wants any) because I don't let him out of the yard. In truth, all the other boys his age,7, are riding electric scooters in the street. My son has Aspergers and ADHD, could you see me letting him do that? I am glad he thinks I am mean, I would rather have him blame me than think that he did something wrong:) What bothers me more is the fact that the neighbors love to talk about him and I all the time. And granted, he is a handful and a half, but he also has a super sweet side. He is sooooo loveable. I think I get more upset about the meaness of people than he ever will. I remember this past week he was telling me that they were playing a game at camp, keep away from the dog gavin, I was sooooo upset, and all he kept saying was, " but mom, we were playing " . I just cried. ~Sharon > ...and we wonder why some kids are so intollerant and inflexable??? > It is wonderful that the kids still shout and wave to your son, > because so many follow in their parents' footsteps!!! > > ~hugs~ > Rabecca > > > > <<Worse than having other kids not wanting to play with ours is that > some > > of the parents don't want them to play together. >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 4, 2004 Report Share Posted November 4, 2004 Thanks Gail, LOL it's always nice when a professional therapist agrees with something I posted <gulp, whew!> :-) Kathy R. in Indiana ----- Original Message ----- > Gosh, even before I had a chance to think through my response to you, > Kathy R had virtually taken the words out of my mouth. Thanks Kathy R! > > I agree that taking away her things/privileges is too harsh. > OCD is such a bully - for you to have to be the " heavy " would be heart-breaking > for BOTH of you. Like Kathy R, I feel that it is so important for your > daughter to feel that you and she are on the same team. I used to tell my daughter > that we would fight OCD together and that during those times when she did not > feel strong enough to keep going, she could " borrow " some of my strength. She > was so greatly comforted by this. > > Behavioral techniques are not very effective in treating OCD. > Behavior Therapy is based on the belief that behavior (and its accompanying > thoughts) can be " shaped " through positive and negative reinforcement. It is > built on the concept that the person has control over the targeted behavior. In > OCD, the behavior is not the real issue - it's the erroneous thought process > that needs changing. That's why CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) is so much > more effective. By addressing the actual erroneous thoughts, we not only > change the resulting behavior but actually change the person's brain chemistry. > There have been numerous studies, with the most detailed ones by Edna Foa, an > Israeli clinician, that show through brain scans that through meds and CBT, the > brain itself actually changes to look like brains in people who do not have > OCD. Fascinating, eh? > > Meantime, while the meds and CBT start to lessen the anxiety in > your daughter (and you), try to lessen the stress in your life by reducing > committments, obligations, etc. You need to take care of yourself in order to be > able to help her. During that period when we were waiting and trying to be > hopeful (which reoccurred when had to abruptly switch meds), she and I > played a lot of cards, checkers and Mancala (an African game played with > stones). > > Please let us know how you are doing! > > Gail in N'awlins Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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