Re: Growth Spurt...aaaahhhh

[Guest guest]

Thanks for all your helpful replies. You've hit quite a few proverbial

nails on the head, so I'm going to reply to all the comments in one

email.

First and foremost, I can't tell you how much I wish that this

difficulty with clothing was listed in the OCD books!!! Based on the

experiences on this list, it seems to be fairly common with girls. As

a special education teacher I have read many books about OCD through

the years. I can tell you that if I had read about the dressing

issues, it would have jumped out at me and I would have recognized my

daughter years ago!!

We have done the very thing of buying things she will wear in several

sizes. (I actually had people all over the US scouring their local

Walmarts to find multiples of one shoe after ours sold out). That is

one reason why the sudden growth spurt has really done us in; not only

did she outgrow the shoes she'd been wearing, but she couldn't fit in

the shoes we had stored up in the next size. The other problem is that

we've found that we can't let her get too attached to a particular item

of clothing or she becomes so locked in that she won't wear anything

else. If we give the OCD too much charge it takes over completely.

And, it is especially hard because she too has always been very small.

She still was wearing a size 4 tee shirt that she loved up until a few

months ago. It's funny you guys should mention Goodwill as I had just

thought of that last night. I've got a pair of her favorite pants

here that I've measured, and tomorrow I am going to see if I can find

some similar items.

Kathy, you are so right about underwear, socks, and bras. The kid was

still cramming herself into size 4 and 6 underpants! Then she freaks

out that the new ones are too loose. All the socks are too big until

we wash them and then they are too small. Thank goodness we've found a

bra style she likes so we have a few to rotate. It's funny too

because if she can stand to wear something around the house, she does

get used to it. More often than not, though, she finds that she has to

bite the bullet and storm off to school in a new item. At home, it's

too easy to take it back off, but if we can get her out the door she

will eventually adjust.

As far as what she's been wearing: Well, she was cramming her foot

into the too small shoes until I threw them out. Now, she's been

wearing flip-flops. She has 4 or 5 pairs of pants she can wear which

would be find, except she is also at that age (nothing to do with OCD)

where she doesn't bring her laundry out and then finds she has nothing

clean to wear. She also has a few tee shirts she can wear. The issue

isn't so hugely what she wears, it's the abuse she hurls at everyone

every morning while she is trying to find something she can wear. It's

all our fault that nothing fits or matches. sigh...

We brought all her shoes with us last week to the therapist to try to

get her to wear a pair, but no luck. My daughter really still lacks a

lot of insight whenever the OCD is strongest. We've actually been doing

a trial run of Xanax as needed. I'll do a separate post in a second.

Anyway, this morning she walked out dressed in a brand new outfit.

" Just don't talk to me, OK. " And off she went - fine.

Hope it lasts.

Jeanne

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 11/30/2004 8:45:41 P.M. Pacific Standard Time,

jwestpha@... writes:

" Just don't talk to me, OK. "

Oh Jeanne, too bad we can't meet for coffee after the morning drama plays

itself out! We have been having a record cold spell here and last night at

dinner Annie announced that she was going to wear her coat today (first time

ever). We all started to make some comment and she interrupted us and said,

" BUT!! if a single one of you makes a single comment about why I haven't worn it

before, it's not going to happen! " Obviously we all shut our mouths.

Of course the coat is still downstairs, so I guess she wore a sweatshirt

again after all.

[Guest guest]

You may have tried this already, but what about

requiring her to pick out her clothes ahead of time?

For us, mornings are a nightmare b/c my 12-yo dd's

always tired and cranky and we're in a rush. It

doesn't take much to set off a temper tantrum. In the

past, it has helped to give her a certain amount of

time to choose her clothes for the entire week. Then

she has to wear what she selected, no discussion. If

we do this on Sunday morning, there's still time to

throw stuff in the wash if she needs it (my dd has the

same problem your daughter has with getting the

dirties into the wash).

--- Jeanne wrote:

> The issue

> isn't so hugely what she wears, it's the abuse she

> hurls at everyone

> every morning while she is trying to find something

> she can wear. It's

> all our fault that nothing fits or matches. sigh...

__________________________________________________