Guest guest Posted December 15, 2001 Report Share Posted December 15, 2001 Hi Edith, I don't know what it is about him but he really irks me. I am familiar with his work but after i saw him either on a video or TV I can't remember he really irritated me!! --- Edith wrote: > Hi , > > The reason you feel *guilty* for 'talking' on this > list about your > mother is because you were CONTROLLED by her through > FOG (ie, Fear, > Obligation, and GUILT). Within the BPD-containing > family there was/is an > unwritten rule: " Thou shalt not reveal the family > secrets " . I recommend > that you read Bradshaw's book " The Family " . In > it he writes about > family secrets plus lots more stuff that went on > behind the closed doors > of Home Sweet Home. > > Six years ago I also felt as you expressed and my > mother had already > been deceased for a decade. That's the reason I > began using the word > " nada " to replace the word " mother " . It removed the > emotional > connotatons from using the " mother " word. Some KOs > can and want to use > the word 'mother' while others prefer to use the > word 'nada'. Just use > whichever you feel the more comfortable with. We KOs > heal as we start > sharing our stories and get validation and support > from the other KOs > who've walked in the same shoes. > > Cheers, > Edith > > > You wrote: > > << > Holly, > Oh my.... My mother was really into sewing when I > was > younger. She always had matching outfits with me and > then with my younger brother as well. When we were > older, after she had ledt us she used to remind us > all > the time how she sewed all of our clothes and made > us > matching outfits. Too bad there is more to > parenting. > Now I am starting to feel guilty for talking about > her. > > >> > ===== K. Lutman Mannheim, Germany Mom to Brennan 10/3/99 http://www.growthspurts.com/view.asp?s=6344 __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2001 Report Share Posted December 15, 2001 BTW what ever happened to Bradshaw? It seems like he has disapeared of the face of the earth. ** , Stinky's caretaker** Froehliche Weihnachten, Merry Christmas Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2001 Report Share Posted December 15, 2001 Hi , You wrote: << I don't know what it is about him but he really irks me. I am familiar with his work but after i saw him either on a video or TV I can't remember he really irritated me!! >> Hmmmm, dunno anything about that. Maybe you split him all bad??? <swoosh, swoosh, swooshing some flea powder> For me, I hadn't previously ever heard/thought about family secrets and there it was right there in his book when I needed to know about it. Edith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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