RE: RE: To Cyndi and also to

[Guest guest]

To Cyndi,

I just want to say how thrilled it is to know that you and your husband remarried after the birth of Lexi! They are beautiful! Thank you for sharing their picture! It is amazing how these kids can either "pull you together" as a family or tear you apart because one parent just cannot deal with it. I'm so happy for you both and I know just how much joy can be received from a special child (or children) with Down Syndrome, which brings me to comment to : Somehow, I almost missed your post as I had nearly 500 emails and it was impossible to read them all, so I randomly read only some of them, and I found your email "under" Cyndi's!! , I'm not going to lie to you about my husband. When our second child with Down Syndrome () was born, my husband took it hard. I was the one comforting him! He was puzzled and just a bit "proud" to think that it could happen to us again. He even got angry at God....but only for a few short hours. It wasn't until he went home from the hospital that he broke down and he said he realized, that God doesn't make mistakes. He knows God is in control of all things. He felt frightened that just as easily as God gave to us...He could take her away. (we had just found out she had a serious heart defect). He came back the next day and held her and began marveling at how bright she appeared and how she looked him right right in the eyes and she followed his finger back and forth. Well, the rest is history. She's his little princess and very much a Daddy's girl!!! She pulled us close together as a family and yes, even though there's 10 years between her and (also Down Syndrome), she is the JOY of our lives. Three years later I gave birth to , and we both were joyous at his birth and we decided to get "fixed" (...yes...Mike went to the Vet.....ha...ha.!) so we could keep up with them all. Mike's love for me and all seven of our kids is just amazing!!! He helps with anything and everything! I am so grateful! As for the challenges of three kids with DS, well, they are daily! But my motto is: "ONE DAY AT A TIME!". We had some health challenges with all three at different stages in their lives. Ben and both have a heart defect. (two different kinds!) They were repaired early. (Ben's was repaired when he was 16 months old. 's was repaired at 3 months old.) God is so good to allow the years in between, because Ben was picture of health by the time came into the world. , on the other hand, is our biggest challenge. He also has Autism and he is non verbal and is not potty trained yet and he chokes easily. He also has Juvenile Arthritis, which is currently in remission, but he does have flair ups occasionally. I'm starting to think that may always be in diapers, but I will NOT give up trying to potty train him. While three of our typical kids are married and all over the country, we just have the three kids with Down syndrome here at home, and honestly.....they are so EASY! is into music and plays all different types. She is really into Tayler Swift and Hillary Duff and Miley Cyress right now. She also loves Praise Music and old Hymns. She can tell us what she needs and what she'd like to get. is into Disney stuff! His whole room is decorated in all the character's of Disney movies and although he's 27, he still likes a cartoon or a Disney movie. He also enjoys trying to read and he also LOVES puzzles and saving pennies and nickles. Again, is our biggest challenge but Mike and I "count it all joy" to care for him and his needs. We have the support of each other and the encouragement of each other and that's a big deal! One last thing, Mike and I still LOVE dating! We get out two or three times a month and go to dinner and a movie. It keeps the marriage alive and well! We tell each other that we love each other regularly and we hug and we still like holding hands, like a couple of teenagers and we don't hide it from our kids. Do you know that I NEED to lose 50 pounds and my husband still tells me that I'm beautiful? It great to know that I'm loved so much by my man of 35 years (36 actually if you count when I met him!) and that I love him just as much...if not more even!!! I attribute it to all the closeness that we have as a family and all the love that the Down Syndrome kids have shown to us and all the joy that they've given us as each one learned one more thing...and most of all, I thank God, that all of this.....was part of His Plan for our lives! Take care now!

Joyce-wife to Mike for 35 wonderful years!

mom to:

-34, Leah-33, Mike-30, -27(DS),-25, -17(DS), and -13 (DS/Autism)

To: Multiples-DS From: christianone93560@...Date: Sun, 17 Oct 2010 08:57:57 -0700Subject: Re: RE: families with multiple children with DS [2 Attachments]

[Attachment(s) from Cyndi Holland included below]

Here are my 2 children with DS, Zachary 9 yrs and is almost 2yrs. My husband and I separated and divorced during my pregnancy with Lexi. Our divorce was final 3 days after she was born. We had other marital issues that actually caused the divorce but I never expected to get back together or that my husband would want to be part of her life. We were remarried less than a year after her birth and our divorce. We are doing well and attribute our reconsiliation to Lexi and the fact that she was born with DS. We love her to pieces. I attatched pics of both of our wonderful special children. We have 5 kids total, 19, 17, 9, 3 and 22 months... we are busy.

Lots of love for you and your family,

Cyndi

Subject: RE: families with multiple children with DSTo: Multiples-DS Date: Thursday, October 14, 2010, 9:57 AM

Hi Joyce, I noticed a while back you have 3 children with DS & I have proudly bragged about you to my husband because you proudly announce you are "wife to Mike for 35 wonderful years", despite the fact of having a child or many children with DS or a disability.

You & many others on this website have proved to my husband that though there are challenges there are fathers & men that are going to hang in there & stick by their womans side & assist in caring for the child/ren.

I am currently pregnant with my second son that has DS, my husband took it very hard in the beginning & he found all the negatives to having another child with a disability. He read many articles on the internet in which the parents ended up in divorce because of the challenges of having a child/ren with disabilities. He found some where the mother was the one that couldn't deal with the fact that she had a child with a disability. After all the reading, he asked me if it meant there is that possibility that he would walk out on us would I still keep the baby? I told him yes I will keep the baby. Today he is proud to have another son even though he has DS. He tells me he is happy I didn't go through with the "unthinkable" as he wanted.

It appears to me that fathers more than mothers have a difficult time accepting a child with a disability, So I proudly commend those fathers that hung in there & joyfully announce there child/ren to the world.

Joyce I just thought I would share a little background about me & some of my feelings. What I really want to know since your children are older, did you have many challenges while they where growing? My son is 7 and I am due to deliver Cruz the end of November. Although I am aware that every child is different, Will you share with me some things to expect?

Sincerely,

Proud Mom to Jamal 28, Dimitri 21, Nilsa 19, Marco 9, 7 DS, Cruz 0 DS