Guest guest Posted July 17, 2009 Report Share Posted July 17, 2009 Tresse my daughter's anxiety was very high during the school year and same thing wouldn't to bed. Finally my daughter refused to go to school at all. Our therapist said it is very common for adults and children with high anxiety at night to sleep with the TV on. Your husband has to stop with getting physical. I understand his frustration. But your daughter's behavior will only worsen. If he is convinced it is poor parenting contact the Yale Parenting and Conduct Clinic in CT. They will tell you to change behaviors what ever the reason you have to use positive reinforcement. They will also strongly tell you punishments and getting physical are negative reinforcers. He is strenghtening definace not cooperation. Your right in thinking things will get worse with this strategy. What he is doing has to stop. Unfortunately if her anxiety is so severe it is unlikely a positive reinforcer will help. Her anxiety has to be reduced perhaps with medication. Nighttime anxiety is hard to get under control. Pam > > Donna, My 13 yr old daughter does the same to me at bedtime. Total defiance of any bed-time rule. She says she cannot go to sleep if she is anxious and she is always anxious. I give her benadryl to knock her out around 10:30 which sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. She lashes out with physical violence, throwing things, and abusive words towards me. My husband works 5 nights a week and on the nights he is here he cannot contain his temper with her defiant behavior. I try to calm them both down but things usually escalate to my husband dragging her into bed screaming and crying. I feel like my family is disintegrating before my eyes. My husband tells me I set no boundaries for her. I do, but she refuses to comply. Just to get her to shower once every 5 days is an all day chore. I am so exhausted most nights I just let her fall asleep with the TV on. She stays up till 2 AM most nights because she is afraid of bad dreams. We are in OCD hell here. > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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