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Re: Lunch Room

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Could he be

allowed to listen to a CD player with earphones? That might help.

Maralee

Lunch

Room

I am looking for ideas on how to handle problems my

son is having in

the cafeteria. He goes to a school where

breakfast and lunch are

both served at school. His behavior in the

lunchroom has included

spitting, sneezing on people's food, kicking other

kids, mouthing off

to the principal, etc. He is in danger of a

suspension if it

continues. I realize the cafeteria is

totally a sensory overload

kind of place with no sound softening adaptations

in place, and that

is why he is melting down on almost a daily basis

there. I have a

meeting with the principal next week and would

like to have some

suggestions. Things I have come up with are

allowing him to sit

alone at a table with a book while he eats, eating

in the classroom

if the teacher could allow this (I don't think its

feasible), sitting

in the office to eat (almost seems like a

punishment), or using a

reward/punishment system for appropriate lunchroom

behavior. I can't

imagine how hard it is for the poor kid to get

through meals at

school with all the pushing in line, talking,

noise, etc.

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My middle son at 13 had emotional meltdowns in the lunchroom... we

ended up allowing him to sit with the 'transition group'... they have

front of line privilages *which decreased the pushing and shoving*,

and he can sit with them and the aid they have during mealtime. They

also get to leave the cafeteria early *save the RUSH of kids to the

hallway at one time*. The noise level didn't both him once he KNEW

there was a 'support' system right there at the table. Should he get

anxious or start 'tic-ing' she would simple start talking about an

interesting subject.

Most of his issues were because of the close proximity of the other

kids in line etc... he felt panicky and clumsy; then embarrassed.

I would ask for a buddy system or aide...with time adjustment for

early in and out.

good luck,

DES

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When you talk to the principal, make sure you get whatever you decided on in your IEP if you have one. If not, try to get one. He has right to sit either by himself, in a secluded area or at least on the end seat on a table. Hope this helps.

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My son's school(s) have had special places for the " quiet kids " to sit at

lunchtime. These are not necessarily quiet kids by nature, but those that need a

less chaotic environment than the lunchroom. For the first six years, Tyler ate

in a classroom, where each kid got to eat at a desk, and the room was set up so

that the desks were bunched in fours, which meant that they could converse with

those around them without feeling like they were in a larger group. It also gave

him the feeling of belonging instead of feeling lost or needing to " stand out "

as he did in the larger environment. His sixth grade year, he often went into

the library and had lunch with the librarian, who then let him " help " her put

books back, organize sections, tidy up etc. on days that he didn't feel like

going outside with the rest of the kids. He alternated between that and the " rat

pack " , who ate lunch in the counselor's room and then spent the rest of lunch

playing various board and card games. All of it was voluntary and open to all

the kids, so he didn't feel forced or " controlled'. He got to try the different

environments and then was able to make choices about what he wanted/needed to do

for the day, which has set him up well for this year (his first year of Jr.

High). He has already made friends with his new librarian, has a new resource

manager that has alternate activities for the kids that " don't feel like they

quite fit with the rest' or " need something different " . He also has a school

counselor that recognizes his needs and has given him suggestions and avenues in

which he can get his individual needs met... Anyway, you may want to check with

the school and see what is offered... Tyler's grade school had about 500

students (k-6th) and his Jr. High has about 2000 (7th and 8th), so it isn't a

matter of size, just a matter of what the school is willing to do to meet the

needs of their student population!!! You would be amazed how many kids besides

ours need these alternate arrangements... It is good for many ADHD, ADD, OCD,

BP, ASD, stressed, shy, traumatized, emotional, uncoordinated, overwhelmed,

over-stimulated, lagging students that just need a smaller group in which to

feel connected to and where they are cared about... Good luck!!!

~hugs~

Rabecca

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