Guest guest Posted January 21, 2004 Report Share Posted January 21, 2004 Hi Des! Our daughter is in a private school for handicapped (is that still a politically correct term?) kids from 6-21. It’s sponsored and run by a Catholic Sisterhood….and they providing a caring, family type environment. We’ve been so happy there. At first, we wondered if it was the right place because some of the kids are very obviously mentally retarded…and we didn’t know if Beth would like it or ‘fit in’ because she is quite smart, in some areas (the ones she’s interested in, of course). But she needed the safe environment…the safe, emotional environment, and she bloomed like a rose in June! It didn’t come the first few weeks, but as she relaxed more and more, school became a NONproblem. She now attends every single day, rides the bus an hour each way each day, eats lunch there, uses the restroom facilities, and participates in P.E…..even swimming right now!! She couldn’t do ANY of that at her previous school. Beth is a 15 year old hormonal girl, and her life revolves around her friends and boyfriend, and the DRAMA that all of their interactions create. “Emotional mayhem,” as you say! Beth is a caretaker personality sometimes, and she takes their problems on herself and worries and becomes anxious FOR them. (She has enough anxiety of her own, she doesn’t need to take on that of others!) So I do hear you about your son being influenced by the problems others are having. Beth seems to find ‘purpose for living’ in the drama she finds at school, as long as it doesn’t becoming overwhelming. Then she cuts herself…. We have our IEP today to make a behavior plan for that, if it happens again. She’s on a pretty even keel right now…yay! It’s difficult when you don’t have many choices for schools. I knew home schooling would never work with Beth and I with that ODD thing going on, etc. Plus she really WANTS people around her even though it’s difficult. She gets depressed being home along for long periods…that happened in 7th grade. I live in the Chicago suburbs so we do have quite a few resources within an hour’s drive for school possibilities. We are fortunate in that. Hang in there, DES, and let us know how things go…. maralee Re: new and in need of answers. Maralee? Asking a probably already answered question... but what 'kind' of school is your DD in? Specifically for Aspergers? Reason I'm asking.. the DS is having difficulty at the level IV mostly with the other kids. Their emotional mayhem. He stays OUT of the problems, but feels anxious when others esculate. He's that way at home too... if the younger son *HFA, 11* goes off about something, or makes an 'off the wall' comment, the kid gets stressed. Paces, clasps hands etc. I can only imagine what he's doing over there in school with the MAJOR behavorial problem kids. Mostly kids on the verge of suspensions are send to this placement. Like I said before, this wasn't my FIRST choice for placement. But only thing within 40 miles that was even similar to a small contained classroom with emotional support for his anxiety. sorry.. did I confuse you or myself here. DES Yahoo! Groups Links · To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/autism-aspergers/ · Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 22, 2004 Report Share Posted January 22, 2004 Thanks Maralee...its 'funny' you mentioned that SAFE word. Thats exactly what my son thrives on.. 'the safe feeling'. He did attend part time with a special group of high schoolers; mostly down syndrome kids...but he fit in! He wasn't 'challenged' by them, felt welcomed and was able to communicate with them. Other kids he feels JUDGED by or challenged emotionally. *shrugs* Unfortunatly, that class of kids only meet on a half day basis; and its skill based. Not really acadmenic (which is what the school psychologist feels he needs more). So where he 'fits' and what he needs are two different things. Make sense? LOL Personally I think he do well in a small classroom setting with half a day of each. The academics should be presented with 'his needs' in mind. He's not an auditory learner... and finds too much info at one time a stessor. He reads and comprehends well. Math is a 'bad' word...and he learns best 'hands on' type learning. Getting an environment like this seems impossible around here. NO solutions are offered. Basically, the believe he's trying to CONTROL his environment to suit his needs.. behaviorally. oh I could go on and on. But I'll save you.. this time IEP meeting for him is on Monday.. Jan 26th. *sighs* DREAD! DES Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 22, 2004 Report Share Posted January 22, 2004 Cappuccino, anyone? Maralee J Re:DES and your son Thanks Maralee...its 'funny' you mentioned that SAFE word. Thats exactly what my son thrives on.. 'the safe feeling'. He did attend part time with a special group of high schoolers; mostly down syndrome kids...but he fit in! He wasn't 'challenged' by them, felt welcomed and was able to communicate with them. Other kids he feels JUDGED by or challenged emotionally. *shrugs* Unfortunatly, that class of kids only meet on a half day basis; and its skill based. Not really acadmenic (which is what the school psychologist feels he needs more). So where he 'fits' and what he needs are two different things. Make sense? LOL Personally I think he do well in a small classroom setting with half a day of each. The academics should be presented with 'his needs' in mind. He's not an auditory learner... and finds too much info at one time a stessor. He reads and comprehends well. Math is a 'bad' word...and he learns best 'hands on' type learning. Getting an environment like this seems impossible around here. NO solutions are offered. Basically, the believe he's trying to CONTROL his environment to suit his needs.. behaviorally. oh I could go on and on. But I'll save you.. this time IEP meeting for him is on Monday.. Jan 26th. *sighs* DREAD! DES Yahoo! Groups Links · To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/autism-aspergers/ · Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 22, 2004 Report Share Posted January 22, 2004 Maralee and DES, Isn't it funny how hard it is sometimes to get our kids into the " SAFE ZONE " and yet how well they do once they decide they are there? My son doesn't function well unless he feels safe and able to protect himself from what might come up, but once in the zone... ~grins~ Thanks for bringing it back to my attention!!! ~hugs~ Rabecca > Thanks Maralee...its 'funny' you mentioned that SAFE word. Thats > exactly what my son thrives on.. 'the safe feeling'. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 22, 2004 Report Share Posted January 22, 2004 Absolutely. It’s 95% of the battle, I think, in our case. The world opens up to her…when she feels safe. She participates in life. maralee Re:DES and your son Maralee and DES, Isn't it funny how hard it is sometimes to get our kids into the " SAFE ZONE " and yet how well they do once they decide they are there? My son doesn't function well unless he feels safe and able to protect himself from what might come up, but once in the zone... ~grins~ Thanks for bringing it back to my attention!!! ~hugs~ Rabecca > Thanks Maralee...its 'funny' you mentioned that SAFE word. Thats > exactly what my son thrives on.. 'the safe feeling'. > Yahoo! Groups Links · To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/autism-aspergers/ · Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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