Re: Just need a few shoulders, again...

[Guest guest]

Oh Liz ~ That's hard. But, at the same time is the aide didn't feel adequate to

do the job, maybe it's a blessing in disguise. Hang in there - and let us know

how the ritalin affects Tori.

Hugs!

Becky

Liz D wrote:

I received a call this morning just before I left for work from Tori's

Learning Support teacher to let me know her new aide has resigned!!!!

Apparently, the aide feels she cannot be touch on Tori the way she needs to be.

The school already have a new aide in mind and she will start with Tori on Tues.

of next week. Ok, then I checked her notebook today when she got home from

school, and she bit the aide on the arm!!! We start the Ritalin

tomorrow...please pray this helps with this issue.

Liz

" Success manifests in small daily events, not only in accomplishing great

things " - Remez Sasson

[Guest guest]

Liz, I hope the Ritalin helps. Some of the so called professional I

have talked to about Ritalin for said they did not want to put

him on it because if the child is already agressive it will may him

more agressive. However the pedi neur surgeon thought zoloft would

help overcome his OCD behaviors and this medicine made him more

agressive. Even though our children are the same they are still

different and what works for may not work for Tori. I am glad

they found her a new aid. Good luck. Cyndi

>

> I received a call this morning just before I left for work from

Tori's Learning Support teacher to let me know her new aide has

resigned!!!! Apparently, the aide feels she cannot be touch on Tori

the way she needs to be. The school already have a new aide in mind

and she will start with Tori on Tues. of next week. Ok, then I

checked her notebook today when she got home from school, and she

bit the aide on the arm!!! We start the Ritalin tomorrow...please

pray this helps with this issue.

>

> Liz

> " Success manifests in small daily events, not only in

accomplishing great things " - Remez Sasson

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Liz,

If the aide quit already then she wasn't the right match for Tori. Better

days.

Charlyne

Mom to Zeb 13 DS/OCD/ASD?

Liz D wrote:

I received a call this morning just before I left for work from Tori's

Learning Support teacher to let me know her new aide has resigned!!!!

Apparently, the aide feels she cannot be touch on Tori the way she needs to be.

The school already have a new aide in mind and she will start with Tori on Tues.

of next week. Ok, then I checked her notebook today when she got home from

school, and she bit the aide on the arm!!! We start the Ritalin

tomorrow...please pray this helps with this issue.

Liz

" Success manifests in small daily events, not only in accomplishing great

things " - Remez Sasson

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 9/26/2006 9:43:11 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

dkrumrei@... writes:

Those are the ones we

want our kids to bite, hit or pull their hair. Then,

they will get a job at Mcs where they belong.

I am sure you were kidding when you said this because I have never been

" trained " to work with Trisha, all I have learned has been on the job training.

The best aid Trisha has ever had was straight off the street with no prior

work or education in being an aid to a special needs child. She was more

willing to learn Trisha's needs and to do things that Trisha needs verses doing

what the " book " said or what she learned in class, she wasn't stuck in one

mode but adaptable to learn outside of the box. Our kids need to learn that

biting and kicking isn't acceptable and that sometimes they have to do

something

whether they like it or not. Trisha learned at an early age not to bite or

kick. It took a little time and being consistent but she hasn't bitten other

people since she was little. No one deserves to be bitten by anyone and

that was something we worked on as a priority and she learned that biting

wasn't going to help her get her way. Trisha is very stubborn but mom was even

more stubborn when it came to biting and hitting and kicking. Now she still

does her " I don't want to " dance but that I can deal with as it doesn't hurt

anyone and it actually might be the only exercise she gets. :-)

Carol

Trishasmom

She isn't typical, She's Trisha!

[Guest guest]

Hi Liz,

I am constantly getting little notes from the school.

They say " Nick earned a time out " . Oh goodie!, He

also started hitting, pinching and pulling hair more

this year. well, he also got 2 new Paras this year.

They aren't trained yet, but he is working on it.

I'll probably have to attend school with him a day to

help her out. He really has 4 different paras during

the day. I know the lunch one gets the worst of it.

At our house he gets a break from eating when he

pinches or hits during meals. After a few minutes, he

decides the food isn't so bad and he finishes. One

thing to remember, at least at Nick's school, some of

these 'paras' are just people looking for part time

work, and this fits the bill. Those are the ones we

want our kids to bite, hit or pull their hair. Then,

they will get a job at Mcs where they belong.

When I gave the school a note, and asked them if they

were demanding more from Nick this year, which will

cause more frustartion, they said they were only

demanding he doesn't hit, pinch and pull hair. Hmmm,

there is just a little problem. They make him sit

through story time, which he hates. So he rufuses to

walk to story time, kicks those sitting next to him at

story time, and pulls his paras hair. Is he spoiled,

if we don't go to story time and watch Barney instead.

Who knows. YOu know what is funny, my 16 year old was

the same way. But, he could say, " I am not going to

story time " . They couldn't physically drag his bum

their and make him listen, so he sat by himself in the

office. Which he LOVED.

So, I started taking Nick to a new speech therapist.

Hopefully we can learn some acceptable signs for my

strong willed child without a voice.

Hang in there! We will survive this and we should try

and do it with a little sense of humor. I'll share

this with you.

Nick is always getting throat and ear infections.

Between the nurse and I we got Nick held down enough

that the Dr. could get a good look down his throat.

It was Ok. Now it was time for the ears. I got Nick

in a head lock (a big hug we call it) and as the Dr.

bent down to check it out, Nick quickly got his foot

up and stuck his big toe in the Dr.'s nostrel. I was

laughing so hard, I was no help removing it. Nick

some times can really make my day. The Dr. was really

sweet about the whole thing. Thank Goodness.

God Bless

Dianna

---

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

We are just wading into the waters on this one - I actually was

included in the interview process for the one-on-one dedicated aide

for my son, DJ, this past month. And only after I insisted that he

needed one. It HAD been on his IEP for 3 years. His primary teacher

assigned an aide during different times of the day from the aides she

had assigned to her class. That worked fine, but in the middle

grades: 4-6, no one could tell me who was assigned to him when.

That's when I insisted he have a dedicated aide. They hired my choice

so we will see how it works out. I just met her, other than at the

interview, yesterday.

I agree that the schools often reward our children for no-compliant

behavior. " Earning a time out!?! " I have been actively trying to get

my son's teacher to utilize positive behavior interventions (Applied

Behavior principles or the Anticedent, Behavior, Consequence thing)

but she has been resistant. Now a formal Behavior plan is to be

written and will be included in his IEP. I agree, Carol, a person can

gointo being an aide or a mom with no training, but they MUST be

willing to learn, or be " teachable. " That is what I look for: a

teachableness.

Many times I have thought, " They are the professionals, they should

know. " But from my observation they don't know and I have come to

believe it is not my jog to teach them everything, JUST to teach them

how to work with my son. It's slow going though.

Donnell (mom to DJ-age 11)

>

[Guest guest]

*I am sure you were kidding when you said this because

I have never been

" trained " to work with Trisha, all I have learned has

been on the job training.*

-None of us are trained or put in for what we have.

We do our best and love our little ones. There are

some unfortunately that don't have the ability or real

desire to work with our children, but take the job

thinking they can 'handle it'.

Nick has sensory issues along with a naughty streak.

He hasn't bitten for years but the other habits linger

and when someone has no respect for his 'space', it

brings out his bad side.

We don't tolerate it either, but he doesn't seem to

care.

Praise God that Trisha complies to those things you

don't tolerate. You can say a little prayer for us,

because I hate it when Nick hurts others and we aren't

there yet.

With out a sense of humor I would be coiled up in bed

crying all day. I have too much to do for that

behavior. Sorry if my humor is too twisted, but that

is my life right now.

Dianna

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Dianna: I know what you mean. Her staff at school and my dh & I have decided we

definitely need to work on her social skills before trying to teach her

academics in a group setting. Being in close proximity to so many targets is a

distraction for her, but she works great 1:1 in the Learning Support Room. She

makes it through circle time for about 15 min. then she is done and they take

her out. She loves to do circle time (asks for it at home always), but again

there are too many " targets " for her there.

We are very lucky that we have a staff that want to understand her needs and are

working to meet them. I am the one always apologizing for her behaviors. He LS

teacher is always asking what else can she do to help Tori. When she doesn't

succeed at something, the teacher questions herself as to what is she not doing

to help her. I think we definitely need more people like that for our kids.

Liz

Re: Just need a few shoulders, again...

Hi Liz,

I am constantly getting little notes from the school.

They say " Nick earned a time out " . Oh goodie!, He

also started hitting, pinching and pulling hair more

this year. well, he also got 2 new Paras this year.

They aren't trained yet, but he is working on it.

I'll probably have to attend school with him a day to

help her out. He really has 4 different paras during

the day. I know the lunch one gets the worst of it.

At our house he gets a break from eating when he

pinches or hits during meals. After a few minutes, he

decides the food isn't so bad and he finishes. One

thing to remember, at least at Nick's school, some of

these 'paras' are just people looking for part time

work, and this fits the bill. Those are the ones we

want our kids to bite, hit or pull their hair. Then,

they will get a job at Mcs where they belong.

When I gave the school a note, and asked them if they

were demanding more from Nick this year, which will

cause more frustartion, they said they were only

demanding he doesn't hit, pinch and pull hair. Hmmm,

there is just a little problem. They make him sit

through story time, which he hates. So he rufuses to

walk to story time, kicks those sitting next to him at

story time, and pulls his paras hair. Is he spoiled,

if we don't go to story time and watch Barney instead.

Who knows. YOu know what is funny, my 16 year old was

the same way. But, he could say, " I am not going to

story time " . They couldn't physically drag his bum

their and make him listen, so he sat by himself in the

office. Which he LOVED.

So, I started taking Nick to a new speech therapist.

Hopefully we can learn some acceptable signs for my

strong willed child without a voice.

Hang in there! We will survive this and we should try

and do it with a little sense of humor. I'll share

this with you.

Nick is always getting throat and ear infections.

Between the nurse and I we got Nick held down enough

that the Dr. could get a good look down his throat.

It was Ok. Now it was time for the ears. I got Nick

in a head lock (a big hug we call it) and as the Dr.

bent down to check it out, Nick quickly got his foot

up and stuck his big toe in the Dr.'s nostrel. I was

laughing so hard, I was no help removing it. Nick

some times can really make my day. The Dr. was really

sweet about the whole thing. Thank Goodness.

God Bless

Dianna

---

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

HI LIz,

I haven't been able to follow things too closely, so

forgive me if I repeat something someone already said.

As a pont of reference, biting and scratching are one

of Andy's " things. " They have morphed over the years

so that now they only mean physical distress. (unless,

I am sure, somoene is doing too much hand-over-hand

routinely or abusing him).

One lesson that comes up year after year is to make

sure I can be 95% positive there's nothing physical

wrong. I say 95% because two times it has been

allergies - something we can't really determine

easily, but allergy medicine takes it away - go

figure.

Tori is young, so I won't mention PMS.

You might do a trial of ibuprofen or claritin to see

if it is allergies - they're high here in Oregon right

now.

Andy is sensitive to mold, so it seems to change with

different schools. This school has an issue with

mold....and claritin isn't doing the job it used to

for this. So we're taking benedryl and that is

helping- and it's not mamking hm sleepy!

If Tori has an allergy or something that is bugging

her (headache, noise sensitivity, maybe the lights are

causing a headache), then she of course will have

trouble in instruction. She's j ust trying to hang on!

Just a thought.

Joan

--- Liz D wrote:

> Dianna: I know what you mean. Her staff at school

> and my dh & I have decided we definitely need to

> work on her social skills before trying to teach her

> academics in a group setting. Being in close

> proximity to so many targets is a distraction for

> her, but she works great 1:1 in the Learning Support

> Room. She makes it through circle time for about 15

> min. then she is done and they take her out. She

> loves to do circle time (asks for it at home

> always), but again there are too many " targets " for

> her there.

>

> We are very lucky that we have a staff that want to

> understand her needs and are working to meet them.

> I am the one always apologizing for her behaviors.

> He LS teacher is always asking what else can she do

> to help Tori. When she doesn't succeed at

> something, the teacher questions herself as to what

> is she not doing to help her. I think we definitely

> need more people like that for our kids.

>

> Liz

> Re: Just need a few

> shoulders, again...

>

>

>

> Hi Liz,

>

> I am constantly getting little notes from the

> school.

> They say " Nick earned a time out " . Oh goodie!, He

> also started hitting, pinching and pulling hair

> more

> this year. well, he also got 2 new Paras this

> year.

> They aren't trained yet, but he is working on it.

>

> I'll probably have to attend school with him a day

> to

> help her out. He really has 4 different paras

> during

> the day. I know the lunch one gets the worst of

> it.

> At our house he gets a break from eating when he

> pinches or hits during meals. After a few minutes,

> he

> decides the food isn't so bad and he finishes. One

> thing to remember, at least at Nick's school, some

> of

> these 'paras' are just people looking for part

> time

> work, and this fits the bill. Those are the ones

> we

> want our kids to bite, hit or pull their hair.

> Then,

> they will get a job at Mcs where they

> belong.

>

> When I gave the school a note, and asked them if

> they

> were demanding more from Nick this year, which

> will

> cause more frustartion, they said they were only

> demanding he doesn't hit, pinch and pull hair.

> Hmmm,

> there is just a little problem. They make him sit

> through story time, which he hates. So he rufuses

> to

> walk to story time, kicks those sitting next to

> him at

> story time, and pulls his paras hair. Is he

> spoiled,

> if we don't go to story time and watch Barney

> instead.

> Who knows. YOu know what is funny, my 16 year old

> was

> the same way. But, he could say, " I am not going

> to

> story time " . They couldn't physically drag his bum

> their and make him listen, so he sat by himself in

> the

> office. Which he LOVED.

> So, I started taking Nick to a new speech

> therapist.

> Hopefully we can learn some acceptable signs for

> my

> strong willed child without a voice.

>

> Hang in there! We will survive this and we should

> try

> and do it with a little sense of humor. I'll share

> this with you.

>

> Nick is always getting throat and ear infections.

> Between the nurse and I we got Nick held down

> enough

> that the Dr. could get a good look down his

> throat.

> It was Ok. Now it was time for the ears. I got

> Nick

> in a head lock (a big hug we call it) and as the

> Dr.

> bent down to check it out, Nick quickly got his

> foot

> up and stuck his big toe in the Dr.'s nostrel. I

> was

> laughing so hard, I was no help removing it. Nick

> some times can really make my day. The Dr. was

> really

> sweet about the whole thing. Thank Goodness.

>

> God Bless

>

> Dianna

>

> ---

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

Dianna and Liz,

This was the same for my daughter. She had been in a special school with 6

kids and 2 teachers when she was 6 yrs. She was the " worst " of the group for

communication literacy numercy. The next year she was to be grouped with mostly

non talkers, with 2 in wheelchairs - she also has a thing for w/chairs and will

sit in them every chance she gets and loves pushing them. I still laugh about

the time she went up to a elderly women in a motorized chair in a shopping

centre found the controls and reversed her down the aisle.

Anyway we changed her to a regular school with a spec ed unit. It took about

6 months to get her to sit in the circle. She would sit behind the teacher -

unfortunately one day she found a pair of sissors and cut a chunk out of the

teacher's hair !! This year she does sit amoung the kids in mat time. There

are still incidences but I think sometimes the kids get in her space and she

does't have the skill to say move away so will just whack them.

I believe she needs social skills before academic in the classroom. She is

sitting longer at her desk. She is sharing pencils. Starting to turn take.

Really she has to learn to live with kids around her. I think the spec school

made her too reliant on adults for help.

She has 2 x 30min sessions 1 on 1 a day to focas on numeracy and literacy in

the unit. Things like singing 10 green bottles and 10 little indians, starting

to read cards with word/pictures ie the monster is sad, I like icecream. We

have not had much luck with writing - she can manage Emma or Ema or Emmmma !

The scribble instinct just takes over. They wanted to put cooking in her iep

but I said no as she can do that at home. She needs to be in the class as much

as possible to learn social skills.

there is a behaviour plan. Incident, verbal prompt/warning, repeat incident,

planning chair, reintroduction, incident, leave class, (something like that) so

it is the same concequence routine.

oh is is just too much to think about some days !!!!!!!!!!!! I am spending

the next week of the holidays thinking of bug and insect related things she can

do in the classroom and making resources - I should be on the payroll !!!

ALSO the aide has to know what they are doing. Em will play up for certain

aides eg remove shoes and throw them only for 1 lady.

Good luck to your kids, just take it slow. Also remind the teachers of how we

measure success. Not like regular kids that can been seen week to week. I

compare 6 months or even a year ago to today and then they can see impovement.

Must go - time to make breadfast.

Annette - Australia mum to E-J 8yrs ds/pdd-nos

---------------------------------

On Yahoo!7

Music: Create your own personalised radio station.