Re: Takeoff on Kingsley Trip to Holland

[Guest guest]

ROTFLOL!!!!!!! Sorry Jayne......it's been one of those days here too. LOL

Gail :-)

Sara,

Thank you so much for sharing this - it's so true and so what I needed

today. Tough day of taking to the movies with Emma to see " Garfield

2 " .

I now know for sure that I've been in this world of Autism too long as I

can't even really identify with people from " other countries " anymore. I

discovered this on my recent vacation, I just don't know how to have a " normal "

conversation anymore, don't know what to talk about. I no longer keep eye

contact with anyone even if 's not with me, I guess I'm so used to

looking

for him in the room when I'm talking to someone.

I found myself laughing at Garfield 2, years ago I would have been crying

from boredom and stupidness - now that's my life, Garfield 2! I no longer care

what others say behind my back as I'm chasing my child through the entrance

of the movie theater - who's idea was it to put an arcade on both sides of

the huge foyer? UGH. I no longer care that my son is in the middle of the

game that two other kids are " playing " ( read - they think they are playing but

they haven't inserted any money - hence the reason, I DON'T CARE - they

aren't losing money and my kid is getting entertained!!), I don't care that

he's

standing behind those kids now hand-flapping crazily at the sheer violence of

the video game in the " arcade " of the family-centered theater!

I don't care that my shirt is halfway up my back as I'm trying to peel

off the ground, juggling my over-flowing purse filled with " guys " ,

juice

boxes, pretzels, and what-not, my 44 oz. coke to get me through the rest of

the night, my small buttered popcorn that will haunt my digestive system for

the next 3 days, and my daughter standing there trying to help and not caring

that everyone is staring at us. I remember when it was a treat to go to the

movies - now it's a treat still but in a different way, once I get into the

actual theater, then it's a treat. When I leave the confinement of actcual

movie-reeling stadium-seated dimly lit retreat, all hell breaks loose again.

I've gotta pee, I've got that damn purse to deal with, my cup has been drained,

my popcorn is already attacking my digestive tract and my skin feels like

butter has been slathered all over it - all in the 90 minutes of " peace " I just

experienced, even though sat on my lap for 4/5ths of

the movie driving my knee into positions Flamingo's even find uncomfortable.

But none-the-less, it was a treat to go to the movies.

Just another day in paradise------

Jayne

[Guest guest]

Today is a MUCH better day. has been very sweet, loving on me, kissing

and hugging me and generally behaving well. What a difference a day makes.

BUT, I'm so glad you got a chuckle out of it, where would we be without

humor?!

Take care,

Jayne

smilinggail@... wrote:

ROTFLOL!!!!!!! Sorry Jayne......it's been one of those days here too. LOL

Gail :-)

Sara,

Thank you so much for sharing this - it's so true and so what I needed

today. Tough day of taking to the movies with Emma to see " Garfield 2 " .

I now know for sure that I've been in this world of Autism too long as I

can't even really identify with people from " other countries " anymore. I

discovered this on my recent vacation, I just don't know how to have a " normal "

conversation anymore, don't know what to talk about. I no longer keep eye

contact with anyone even if 's not with me, I guess I'm so used to

looking

for him in the room when I'm talking to someone.

I found myself laughing at Garfield 2, years ago I would have been crying

from boredom and stupidness - now that's my life, Garfield 2! I no longer care

what others say behind my back as I'm chasing my child through the entrance

of the movie theater - who's idea was it to put an arcade on both sides of

the huge foyer? UGH. I no longer care that my son is in the middle of the

game that two other kids are " playing " ( read - they think they are playing but

they haven't inserted any money - hence the reason, I DON'T CARE - they

aren't losing money and my kid is getting entertained!!), I don't care that he's

standing behind those kids now hand-flapping crazily at the sheer violence of

the video game in the " arcade " of the family-centered theater!

I don't care that my shirt is halfway up my back as I'm trying to peel

off the ground, juggling my over-flowing purse filled with " guys " , juice

boxes, pretzels, and what-not, my 44 oz. coke to get me through the rest of

the night, my small buttered popcorn that will haunt my digestive system for

the next 3 days, and my daughter standing there trying to help and not caring

that everyone is staring at us. I remember when it was a treat to go to the

movies - now it's a treat still but in a different way, once I get into the

actual theater, then it's a treat. When I leave the confinement of actcual

movie-reeling stadium-seated dimly lit retreat, all hell breaks loose again.

I've gotta pee, I've got that damn purse to deal with, my cup has been drained,

my popcorn is already attacking my digestive tract and my skin feels like

butter has been slathered all over it - all in the 90 minutes of " peace " I just

experienced, even though sat on my lap for 4/5ths of

the movie driving my knee into positions Flamingo's even find uncomfortable.

But none-the-less, it was a treat to go to the movies.

Just another day in paradise------

Jayne

[Guest guest]

What a wonderful description/take-off you have written here Sara - it made me

laugh so

much - in that slightly desperate way that inihabiting a version of Shmolland

makes you

do. Thanks for the wit and wisdom.

>

>

> Holland Schmolland

> By Krueger Crawford

>

> If you have a child with autism, which I do, and if you troll the Internet

> for information, which I have done, you will come across a certain

> inspirational analogy. It goes like this: Imagine that you are planning a

> trip to Italy. You read all the latest travel books, you consult with

> friends about what to pack, and you develop an elaborate itinerary for your

> glorious trip. The day arrives. You board the plane and settle in with your

> in-flight magazine, dreaming of trattorias, gondola rides and gelato.

> However, when the plane lands you discover, much to your surprise, you are

> not in Italy -- you are in Holland. You are greatly dismayed at this abrupt

> and unexpected change in plans. You rant and rave to the travel agency, but

> it does no good. You are stuck. After a while, you tire of fighting and

> begin to look at what Holland has to offer. You notice the beautiful tulips,

> the kindly people in wooden shoes, the French fries and mayonnaise, and you

> think, " This isn't exactly what I planned, but it's not so bad. It's just

> different. " Having a child with autism is supposed to be like this -- not

> any worse than having a typical child -- just different.

>

> When I read that, my son was almost three, completely non-verbal and was

> hitting me over a hundred times a day. While I appreciated the intention of

> the story, I couldn't help but think, " Are they kidding? We are not in some

> peaceful countryside dotted with windmills. We are in a country under siege

> -- dodging bombs, trying to board overloaded helicopters, bribing officials

> -- all the while thinking, " What happened to our beautiful life? "

>

> That was 5 years ago. My son is now 8 and though we have come to accept that

> he will always have autism, we no longer feel like citizens of a battle torn

> nation. With the help of countless dedicated therapists and teachers,

> biological interventions, and an enormously supportive family, my son has

> become a fun-loving, affectionate boy with many endearing qualities and

> skills. In the process we've created… well… our own country, with its own

> unique traditions and customs.

>

> It's not a war zone, but it's still not Holland. Let's call it Schmolland.

>

> In Schmolland, it is perfectly customary to lick walls, rub cold pieces of

> metal across your mouth and line up all your toys end to end. You can show

> affection by giving a " pointy chin. " A " pointy chin " is when you act like

> you are going to hug someone and just when you are really close, you jam

> your chin into the other person's shoulder. For the person giving the

> " pointy chin " this feels really good, for the receiver not so much – but you

> get used to it. For citizens of Schmolland, it is quite normal to repeat

> lines from videos to express emotion. If you are sad, you can look downcast

> and say " Oh Pongo. " When mad or anxious, you might shout, " Snow can't stop

> me! " or " Duchess, kittens, come on! " Sometimes, " And now our feature

> presentation " says it all. In Schmolland, there's not a lot to do, so our

> citizens find amusement wherever they can. Bouncing on the couch for hours,

> methodically pulling feathers out of down pillows, and laughing hysterically

> in bed at 4:00am, are all traditional Schmutch pastimes.

>

> The hard part about living in our country is dealing with people from other

> countries. We try to assimilate ourselves and mimic their customs, but we

> aren't always successful. It's perfectly understandable that an 8-year-old

> boy from Schmolland would steal a train from a toddler at the the

> Tank Engine Train Table at and Noble. But this is clearly not

> understandable or acceptable in other countries, and so we must drag our 8

> year old out of the store kicking and screaming while all the customers look

> on with stark, pitying stares. But we ignore these looks and focus on the

> exit sign because we are a proud people. Where we live, it is not surprising

> when an 8-year-old boy reaches for the fleshy part of a woman's upper torso

> and says, " Do we touch boodoo? " We simply say, " No we don't touch boodoo "

> and go on about our business. It's a bit more startling in other countries,

> however, and can cause all sorts of cross-cultural misunderstandings. And,

> though most foreigners can get a drop of water on their pants and still

> carry on, this is intolerable to certain citizens in Schmolland who insist

> that the pants must come off no matter where they are, and regardless of

> whether another pair of pants are present.

>

> Other families who are affected by autism are familiar and comforting to us,

> yet are still separate entities. Together we make up a federation of

> countries, kind of like Scandinavia. Like a person from Denmark talking with

> a person from Norway, (or in our case someone from Schmenmark talking with

> someone from Schmorway), we share enough similarities in our language and

> customs to understand each other, but conversations inevitably highlight the

> diversity of our traditions. " Oh your child is a runner? Mine won't go to

> the bathroom without asking permission. " " My child eats paper. Yesterday he

> ate a whole video box. " " My daughter only eats 4 foods, all of them white. "

> " My son wants to blow on everyone. " " My son can't stand to hear the word no.

> We can't use any negatives at all in our house. " " We finally had to lock up

> the VCR because my son was obsessed with the rewind button. "

>

> There is one thing we all agree on: we are a growing population.

>

> 10 years ago, 1 in 10,000 children had autism.

>

> Today the rate is approximately 1 in 250.

>

> Something is dreadfully wrong. Though the causes of the increase are still

> being hotly debated, a number of parents and professionals believe genetic

> pre-disposition has collided with too many environment insults -- toxins,

> chemicals, anti-biotics, vaccines -- to create immunological chaos in the

> nervous systems of developing children. One medical journalist speculated

> that these children are like the proverbial " canary in the coal mine " here

> to alert us to the growing dangers in our environment. While this is

> certainly not a view shared by all in the autism community, it feels true to

> me.

>

> I hope that researchers discover the magic bullet we all so desperately

> crave. And I will never stop investigating new treatments and therapies that

> might help my son. But more and more my priorities are shifting from what

> " could be " to " what is. " I look around at this country my family has

> created, with all its unique customs, and it feels like home. For us, any

> time spent " nation-building " is time well spent

>

>

> Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

>

[Guest guest]

Please - not mine!! I merely redelivered a message from another lsit. I am

so glad it made my buddies on this list hae a happy moment. :~)

Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

>

>Reply-To:

>To:

>Subject: Re: Takeoff on Kingsley Trip to Holland

>Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 11:30:33 -0000

>

>What a wonderful description/take-off you have written here Sara - it made

>me laugh so

>much - in that slightly desperate way that inihabiting a version of

>Shmolland makes you

>do. Thanks for the wit and wisdom.

>

>

>

>

> >

> >

> > Holland Schmolland

> > By Krueger Crawford

> >

> > If you have a child with autism, which I do, and if you troll the

>Internet

> > for information, which I have done, you will come across a certain

> > inspirational analogy. It goes like this: Imagine that you are planning

>a

> > trip to Italy. You read all the latest travel books, you consult with

> > friends about what to pack, and you develop an elaborate itinerary for

>your

> > glorious trip. The day arrives. You board the plane and settle in with

>your

> > in-flight magazine, dreaming of trattorias, gondola rides and gelato.

> > However, when the plane lands you discover, much to your surprise, you

>are

> > not in Italy -- you are in Holland. You are greatly dismayed at this

>abrupt

> > and unexpected change in plans. You rant and rave to the travel agency,

>but

> > it does no good. You are stuck. After a while, you tire of fighting and

> > begin to look at what Holland has to offer. You notice the beautiful

>tulips,

> > the kindly people in wooden shoes, the French fries and mayonnaise, and

>you

> > think, " This isn't exactly what I planned, but it's not so bad. It's

>just

> > different. " Having a child with autism is supposed to be like this --

>not

> > any worse than having a typical child -- just different.

> >

> > When I read that, my son was almost three, completely non-verbal and was

> > hitting me over a hundred times a day. While I appreciated the intention

>of

> > the story, I couldn't help but think, " Are they kidding? We are not in

>some

> > peaceful countryside dotted with windmills. We are in a country under

>siege

> > -- dodging bombs, trying to board overloaded helicopters, bribing

>officials

> > -- all the while thinking, " What happened to our beautiful life? "

> >

> > That was 5 years ago. My son is now 8 and though we have come to accept

>that

> > he will always have autism, we no longer feel like citizens of a battle

>torn

> > nation. With the help of countless dedicated therapists and teachers,

> > biological interventions, and an enormously supportive family, my son

>has

> > become a fun-loving, affectionate boy with many endearing qualities and

> > skills. In the process we've created… well… our own country, with its

>own

> > unique traditions and customs.

> >

> > It's not a war zone, but it's still not Holland. Let's call it

>Schmolland.

> >

> > In Schmolland, it is perfectly customary to lick walls, rub cold pieces

>of

> > metal across your mouth and line up all your toys end to end. You can

>show

> > affection by giving a " pointy chin. " A " pointy chin " is when you act

>like

> > you are going to hug someone and just when you are really close, you jam

> > your chin into the other person's shoulder. For the person giving the

> > " pointy chin " this feels really good, for the receiver not so much – but

>you

> > get used to it. For citizens of Schmolland, it is quite normal to repeat

> > lines from videos to express emotion. If you are sad, you can look

>downcast

> > and say " Oh Pongo. " When mad or anxious, you might shout, " Snow can't

>stop

> > me! " or " Duchess, kittens, come on! " Sometimes, " And now our feature

> > presentation " says it all. In Schmolland, there's not a lot to do, so

>our

> > citizens find amusement wherever they can. Bouncing on the couch for

>hours,

> > methodically pulling feathers out of down pillows, and laughing

>hysterically

> > in bed at 4:00am, are all traditional Schmutch pastimes.

> >

> > The hard part about living in our country is dealing with people from

>other

> > countries. We try to assimilate ourselves and mimic their customs, but

>we

> > aren't always successful. It's perfectly understandable that an

>8-year-old

> > boy from Schmolland would steal a train from a toddler at the the

> > Tank Engine Train Table at and Noble. But this is clearly not

> > understandable or acceptable in other countries, and so we must drag our

>8

> > year old out of the store kicking and screaming while all the customers

>look

> > on with stark, pitying stares. But we ignore these looks and focus on

>the

> > exit sign because we are a proud people. Where we live, it is not

>surprising

> > when an 8-year-old boy reaches for the fleshy part of a woman's upper

>torso

> > and says, " Do we touch boodoo? " We simply say, " No we don't touch

>boodoo "

> > and go on about our business. It's a bit more startling in other

>countries,

> > however, and can cause all sorts of cross-cultural misunderstandings.

>And,

> > though most foreigners can get a drop of water on their pants and still

> > carry on, this is intolerable to certain citizens in Schmolland who

>insist

> > that the pants must come off no matter where they are, and regardless of

> > whether another pair of pants are present.

> >

> > Other families who are affected by autism are familiar and comforting to

>us,

> > yet are still separate entities. Together we make up a federation of

> > countries, kind of like Scandinavia. Like a person from Denmark talking

>with

> > a person from Norway, (or in our case someone from Schmenmark talking

>with

> > someone from Schmorway), we share enough similarities in our language

>and

> > customs to understand each other, but conversations inevitably highlight

>the

> > diversity of our traditions. " Oh your child is a runner? Mine won't go

>to

> > the bathroom without asking permission. " " My child eats paper. Yesterday

>he

> > ate a whole video box. " " My daughter only eats 4 foods, all of them

>white. "

> > " My son wants to blow on everyone. " " My son can't stand to hear the word

>no.

> > We can't use any negatives at all in our house. " " We finally had to lock

>up

> > the VCR because my son was obsessed with the rewind button. "

> >

> > There is one thing we all agree on: we are a growing population.

> >

> > 10 years ago, 1 in 10,000 children had autism.

> >

> > Today the rate is approximately 1 in 250.

> >

> > Something is dreadfully wrong. Though the causes of the increase are

>still

> > being hotly debated, a number of parents and professionals believe

>genetic

> > pre-disposition has collided with too many environment insults --

>toxins,

> > chemicals, anti-biotics, vaccines -- to create immunological chaos in

>the

> > nervous systems of developing children. One medical journalist

>speculated

> > that these children are like the proverbial " canary in the coal mine "

>here

> > to alert us to the growing dangers in our environment. While this is

> > certainly not a view shared by all in the autism community, it feels

>true to

> > me.

> >

> > I hope that researchers discover the magic bullet we all so desperately

> > crave. And I will never stop investigating new treatments and therapies

>that

> > might help my son. But more and more my priorities are shifting from

>what

> > " could be " to " what is. " I look around at this country my family has

> > created, with all its unique customs, and it feels like home. For us,

>any

> > time spent " nation-building " is time well spent

> >

> >

> > Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>--------------------------------------------------

>Checkout our homepage for information, bookmarks, and photos of

>our kids. Share favorite bookmarks, ideas, and other information by

>including them. Don't forget, messages are a permanent record of the

>archives for our list. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/

>--------------------------------------------

>

[Guest guest]

Sara this really was good. The only other one I have run into is the Beirut one

(very applicable right now) but this one was even better. Thanks for sharing it.

Sherry

[Guest guest]

Yes, Sherry. Believe me I am thinking of the Middle East right now. My

middle son is still there with a group of 62 teens he took to tour the

Holyland. he is trying to get them airlifted out ASAP, but last I heard it

may take a week or more.

Life is never simple - that's why it is life and not a museum.

Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

>

>Reply-To:

>To: < >

>Subject: Re: Re: Takeoff on Kingsley Trip to Holland

>Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 12:45:33 -0400

>

>Sara this really was good. The only other one I have run into is the Beirut

>one (very applicable right now) but this one was even better. Thanks for

>sharing it.

>Sherry

>

>

[Guest guest]

<<Yes, Sherry. Believe me I am thinking of the Middle East right now. My

middle son is still there with a group of 62 teens he took to tour the

Holyland. he is trying to get them airlifted out ASAP, but last I heard it

may take a week or more.>>

OMG Sara, you must be a mess (well, not that I can picture you ever being a

" mess " ) but you know what I mean. I'm so sorry...prayers for all of them.for

everyone in that area right now.

Sherry

[Guest guest]

The word in this house is " We are a little concerned at the current

situation. " We do not panic until we need to. Too much opportunity for

panic availaable.

Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

>

>Reply-To:

>To: < >

>Subject: Re: Re: Takeoff on Kingsley Trip to Holland

>Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 15:05:39 -0400

>

><<Yes, Sherry. Believe me I am thinking of the Middle East right now. My

>middle son is still there with a group of 62 teens he took to tour the

>Holyland. he is trying to get them airlifted out ASAP, but last I heard it

>may take a week or more.>>

>

>OMG Sara, you must be a mess (well, not that I can picture you ever being a

> " mess " ) but you know what I mean. I'm so sorry...prayers for all of

>them.for everyone in that area right now.

>Sherry

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thinking of you Sara, hopefully things will get better for your son and his

" charges " soon. It's just awful over there. Keep us posted,

Jayne

sara cohen wrote:

The word in this house is " We are a little concerned at the current

situation. " We do not panic until we need to. Too much opportunity for

panic availaable.

Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

>

>Reply-To:

>To: < >

>Subject: Re: Re: Takeoff on Kingsley Trip to Holland

>Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 15:05:39 -0400

>

><<Yes, Sherry. Believe me I am thinking of the Middle East right now. My

>middle son is still there with a group of 62 teens he took to tour the

>Holyland. he is trying to get them airlifted out ASAP, but last I heard it

>may take a week or more.>>

>

>OMG Sara, you must be a mess (well, not that I can picture you ever being a

> " mess " ) but you know what I mean. I'm so sorry...prayers for all of

>them.for everyone in that area right now.

>Sherry

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Sara,

I am very behind in reading but I am paryaing your son is ok and can get back

to the US quickly and safely.

Charlyne

Mom to Zeb 13 DS/OCD/ASD?

sara cohen wrote:

The word in this house is " We are a little concerned at the current

situation. " We do not panic until we need to. Too much opportunity for

panic availaable.

Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

>

>Reply-To:

>To: < >

>Subject: Re: Re: Takeoff on Kingsley Trip to Holland

>Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 15:05:39 -0400

>

><<Yes, Sherry. Believe me I am thinking of the Middle East right now. My

>middle son is still there with a group of 62 teens he took to tour the

>Holyland. he is trying to get them airlifted out ASAP, but last I heard it

>may take a week or more.>>

>

>OMG Sara, you must be a mess (well, not that I can picture you ever being a

> " mess " ) but you know what I mean. I'm so sorry...prayers for all of

>them.for everyone in that area right now.

>Sherry

>

>

>

>