Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 In a message dated 4/18/2006 1:22:14 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, mick8_7@... writes: Poor Mic Im so glad he doesnt know what they were saying..I will talk to my neighbor and maybe she can have a talk with the kids. My heart just broke for Mic. Yes, it's IS heartbreaking, Laurie. I often get stares from small children when I'm out with Maddie. My experience has always been that the kids have come right out and asked me about her. I tell them I welcome their questions. It is a good idea to address the children yourself when you notice them saying unkind things. And you can also talk with the neighbor.....it will make a difference if she is open with her children, and it will also give her a cool learning opportunity that some kids are never exposed to. We don't have the worry of Maddie getting hurt or offended; she wants nothing to do with other kids in the first place. Now THAT makes me really sad!!!! Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 It is heartbreaking when things like that happen. My kids all get stares all of the time..it is so hard. I think explaining would be helpful though. Brigid they called Mic creepy My neighbor has a day care next door and Mic ran over to play with the kids there was 4 5 year old boys. Mic was happy and going down the slide and laughing then one of the kids says " hes creepy " and they all said hes creepy and ran in the house.I was stunned and did not know what to say.Why cant he talk why cant he play why is he chasing us hes creepy.I didnt have time to say anything before they ran in the house.Poor Mic Im so glad he doesnt know what they were saying..I will talk to my neighbor and maybe she can have a talk with the kids. My heart just broke for Mic. Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 Hi Laurie, You have neighbors? I would have asked your neighbor if Mic could play with the boys and let the boys know that Mic cannot talk but he enjoys playing with them. I would have supervised that situation and told your neighbor the boy was very unkind immediately. Five year old boys can be fresh. Do you know for sure that Mic didn't understand? I think it's good that Mic can go out and be with the kids. I would not get too upset over it and try again. Charlyne Mom to Zeb 13 DS/OCD/ASD? nolan wrote: My neighbor has a day care next door and Mic ran over to play with the kids there was 4 5 year old boys. Mic was happy and going down the slide and laughing then one of the kids says " hes creepy " and they all said hes creepy and ran in the house.I was stunned and did not know what to say.Why cant he talk why cant he play why is he chasing us hes creepy.I didnt have time to say anything before they ran in the house.Poor Mic Im so glad he doesnt know what they were saying..I will talk to my neighbor and maybe she can have a talk with the kids. My heart just broke for Mic. Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 Hi Laurie, That really hurts doesn't it?? I had a similar experience when was about 10, the little girl across the street was 9 and she would come over to " play " with , one day she brought her friend with her and I noticed they were staring at whispering in each others ears, and giggling, I went right to the source the children themselves and pulled them aside, and said " Sammie I thought you were coming over and because you liked , I don't think its very nice what I just saw you doing, I thought you understood about and what makes him different, I told her never to come back again if she was going to behave like that again, I then called her MOm, and explaned it to her, Sammie came over the next day and said she was sorry, I told her not to tell me but to tell KYle, and she did, never problems again, Viola Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 Oh, Laurie! I am so sorry. Someone needs to explain to those boys that Mic is not creepy, just a bit different!!! Perhaps your neighbor and you can sit down with them. Perhaps read the book " We'll Paint the Octopus Red " to them. Liz they called Mic creepy > My neighbor has a day care next door and Mic ran over to play with the > kids there was 4 5 year old boys. Mic was happy and going down the slide > and laughing then one of the kids says " hes creepy " and they all said hes > creepy and ran in the house.I was stunned and did not know what to say.Why > cant he talk why cant he play why is he chasing us hes creepy.I didnt have > time to say anything before they ran in the house.Poor Mic Im so glad he > doesnt know what they were saying..I will talk to my neighbor and maybe > she can have a talk with the kids. My heart just broke for Mic. Laurie > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 That's hard. I'd talk to your neighbor about it....she probably doesn't know the boys reacted like that & maybe if she or both of you can talk to them about Mic & how he might not be able to talk and do things exactly like they do, but he is still a boy & likes to play just like them. I've had a few experiences similar to this, but unfortunately I wasn't able to talk to the parent or have ever seen the kids agian since it was at the neighborhood park. I do think, that even if Mic didn't appear to notice what happened, that he may, in a way, sense what happened. I know that even though Dylan may not " totally get it " he knows to a point, what is going on. Good luck! Becky nolan wrote: My neighbor has a day care next door and Mic ran over to play with the kids there was 4 5 year old boys. Mic was happy and going down the slide and laughing then one of the kids says " hes creepy " and they all said hes creepy and ran in the house.I was stunned and did not know what to say.Why cant he talk why cant he play why is he chasing us hes creepy.I didnt have time to say anything before they ran in the house.Poor Mic Im so glad he doesnt know what they were saying..I will talk to my neighbor and maybe she can have a talk with the kids. My heart just broke for Mic. Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 I discovered when this happened with a few times that kids actually think " it " may be contagious. They seem to accept all explanations with an " oh well " and then don't even seem to care. I realize this can be worse with much older kids. Like Maddie doesn't ever want to play with anybody. We just get this stunned silent treatment when she walks by the kids outside playing. Lord help them if they dare say anything when Dad is around or her behavior therapist who is ready to lecture adults and children alike. You have no idea how many times I've had to hold myself back when some neighborhood punk comes up and asks " whas wrong wit her eyes? " . I sooooo want to say " gee I don't know, what's wrong with your mouth? " . Haven't done it yet, but it doesn't mean it's not gonna happen. I'll probably end up in the ER LOL. Sherry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2006 Report Share Posted April 18, 2006 When my daughter was in the 3rd grade one of her friends did not want to sit next to in the car for the fear of catching Down Syndrome.If my child had a friend that had a brother/sister with any disability I would feel that it was my responsibility to explain to the child so the child would not make ignorant comments or ask stupid question.It seems to me with these more of these kiddos being intergrated into regular classrooms kids would be more educated and used to being around these kids more.What is wrong with this earth? Cyndi > > I discovered when this happened with a few times that kids actually think " it " may be contagious. They seem to accept all explanations with an " oh well " and then don't even seem to care. I realize this can be worse with much older kids. Like Maddie doesn't ever want to play with anybody. We just get this stunned silent treatment when she walks by the kids outside playing. Lord help them if they dare say anything when Dad is around or her behavior therapist who is ready to lecture adults and children alike. > > You have no idea how many times I've had to hold myself back when some neighborhood punk comes up and asks " whas wrong wit her eyes? " . I sooooo want to say " gee I don't know, what's wrong with your mouth? " . Haven't done it yet, but it doesn't mean it's not gonna happen. I'll probably end up in the ER LOL. > Sherry > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 In a message dated 4/18/2006 10:53:52 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, cynthiamiltonburns@... writes: It seems to me with these more of these kiddos being intergrated into regular classrooms kids would be more educated and used to being around these kids more.What is wrong with this earth? Kids ask questions, they always have and they always will. If you are talking about 4-5 years old how much can you really expect them to understand about something that some adults have a hard time understanding. It really worries me how much people want small children to grow up so fast and to understand the workings of the world just like adults do. Kids can be cruel and calling names is not good for anyone, child or adult alike. However, one thing I have learned over the years is that sometimes parents are the worst for causing our kids embarrassment and feeling different because of the way we react to everyone including small children. Yes I have had young children ask me about Trisha eyes and I just told them that she was different and they were ok with that, trying telling to much to a small child just makes your child seem even stranger to them. The negative comments I have heard over the years have not been from kids but from adults. To be honest, not everyone will be accepting of our kids or anyone that is different and that is human nature. Not everyone will like our kids, again that is human nature, I'm sure there are people we adults don't like or kids our children don't like. I am also sure that if a kid called a special needs child creepy they probably call other kids that are new some kind of name as well. As far as looking and deciding that kid is a bully, gee isn't that kind of being the same as the child calling someone else creepy? Because other kids followed this kid does not make him a bully, maybe a leader and because a kid calls another kid a name really doesn't make them a bully either. New kids whether they are special needs or not tend to get picked on at first until they have been there awhile, take this from a military brat who was a new kid a lot! For the most part I have found that kids are much more accepting of our children than the adults are. I highly agree that the teacher should talk to the child/children about their manners and how name calling isn't good at any time but beyond that any more and you just might alienate someone who might be a potential friend. Carol Trishasmom She isn't Typical, She's Trisha! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 In a message dated 4/19/2006 4:51:28 A.M. Central Standard Time, writes: Laurie you can teach Mic that sign but remember he will use it on you and his teachers so be prepared to stand up and explain why you taught it. I think I would wait a few years,LOL. Zeb gave his 6th grade teacher the finger after I taught him. Zeb knew the teacher wasn't happy so he told him he was practicing for the middle school. He also told the teacher that I taught it to him. They think I'm nuts but whatever works. I do get into trouble teaching Zeb some of these things. He gave his para the finger yesterday. The principal came out to my car while I was waiting for Zeb at the end of the day to tell me. All I could say to him was(thinking fast), did the para understand he was upset with her? The principal had no comeback,whew. If you can't find the humor in some of this stuff it will make you crazy. I will be traveling out your way to Gail's house May 7 if you want to meet at the Dunkin Donut on exit 23 or is it 24. Let me know. Charlyne Mom to Zeb 13 DS/OCD/ASD? Laurie, I think you have gotten lots of good advice from people. I still stinks doesn't it! As far giving people the finger, knew the " f " word and how to give people the finger when I met him at age 7 (such a precocious child). Of course he didn't have the fine motor control to isolate that finger so it looked more like a backward wave. I have a fond memory of pulling him down the sidewalk in his wagon on the way to the park. This adorable blonde hair, blue eyed boy and he is swearing and flipping off every car that went by. They all think he is waving and saying hi so they are all smiling and waving. He just kept getting more mad because he wasn't getting a reaction. LOL!! Karyn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 jUST WANTED TO SHARE THIS, when he does not want to do something or does not want to be bothered with questions and such has a really bad habit of saying " shut-up " , at home and school,I understand that this is rude, however he has very limited words, and he does get his point across and I can't help but be thankful, that he has some word to show he does not want to be bothered. It could be much worse without a word, or gesture, a child can become so frustrated he will become physical and hit instead of saying something like shut -up., I always try and redirect and say thats not nice to say ,say " not now " or don't want to " but he always goes back to SHUT-UP. Viola Keep in mind, I have " Get off my back " and " Get out of my face " on Andy's voice output. I dont' htink saying " leave me alone, please " is appropriate. But those statements say plenty and are not considered obscene by anyone. Rude, perhaps, but not obscene. FWIW, Joan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 In a message dated 4/19/2006 11:53:49 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, ViPorier@... writes: " not now " or don't want to " but he always goes back to SHUT-UP. Trisha will say shush up from time to time and here lately when she doesn't want to do something she says no way. :-) Carol Trishasmom She isn't Typical, She's Trisha! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 Mic can point with his index finger. Mic doesnt even know or get mad he just doesnt understand but someday he will. And I hate kids that are disrespectful so we wont teach Mic that. Someday he will understand and then we will figure out something I dont want him to get mad and hit/ Its along way off I hope.If I ever said the f word in my house I would have my mouth washed out with soap. I saw my mom give my brother a shot of palmolive one day YUCK, he never did it again. Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 The problem with kids, with or without disabilities, swearing or using the finger is that the *cuteness* wears off REAL fast. Trust me. My younger sister is 34 and has four kids. They are ALL characters, just like her and her husband. But since Eileen and Adam use foul language and raise their kids quite uniquely, so do their children swear as well. Leen and Adam thought it was oh so funny at first, until they couldn't get them to stop doing it and it became embarrassing to take them anywhere. Cursing at the elderly in supermarkets just doesn't give you a giggle, if you know what I mean. Now, the kids are a little older, but , at 4, could make you turn purple. I got into an argument with my BIL about it....he was asking my advice on how to get his kids to stop cursing. I told him to stop doing it himself. Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 I used SOS for my older son once and that's all it took. Charlyne nolan wrote: Mic can point with his index finger. Mic doesnt even know or get mad he just doesnt understand but someday he will. And I hate kids that are disrespectful so we wont teach Mic that. Someday he will understand and then we will figure out something I dont want him to get mad and hit/ Its along way off I hope.If I ever said the f word in my house I would have my mouth washed out with soap. I saw my mom give my brother a shot of palmolive one day YUCK, he never did it again. Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 I have a fond memory of pulling him down the sidewalk in his wagon on the way to the park. This adorable blonde hair, blue eyed boy and he is swearing and flipping off every car that went by. They all think he is waving and saying hi so they are all smiling and waving. He just kept getting more mad because he wasn't getting a reaction. --------------- Ok, this is funny! I can remember , at about 20 months not being able to make the " t " and " r " sound. So we're at this light in a small lumber mill town and a big log truck pulls up next to us. The windows are down and the sun roof open and says (really excitedly and loud), " Mommy!! Look at the big F___! " I look over and the truck driver is ROARING With laughter. Another friend of mine, who had an adult son with intellectual disabilites' son was flipping people off all the time. lived in the bible belt at the time and was the director of special education...this gesture was absolutely not part of their family values! He was so horrified he taped his fingers together - something he feels horrid about now and sometimes put mittens on the boy so you could not see the gesture. IT's people's reaction TO the gesture that can get kids into trouble. They may or may not know what they're doing, but it is a provocative gesture in this culutre and las led to many a shouting match, fist fight, and even gun fire. Standing up for yourself and inciting anger are two different thngs. I get taht our kids need a way to express just how mad they are, but we can't control other people...so I find it wise to avoid teaching things that may not get the desired response. Keep in mind, I have " Get off my back " and " Get out of my face " on Andy's voice output. I dont' htink saying " leave me alone, please " is appropriate. But those statements say plenty and are not considered obscene by anyone. Rude, perhaps, but not obscene. FWIW, Joan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 That is just too funny!!!! Re: they called Mic creepy > > I have a fond memory of pulling him down the sidewalk in his wagon > on the > way to the park. This adorable blonde hair, blue eyed boy and he is > swearing and > flipping off every car that went by. They all think he is waving > and saying > hi so they are all smiling and waving. He just kept getting more > mad because > he wasn't getting a reaction. > --------------- > Ok, this is funny! > > I can remember , at about 20 months not being able to make > the " t " and " r " sound. So we're at this light in a small lumber mill > town and a big log truck pulls up next to us. The windows are down > and the sun roof open and says (really excitedly and > loud), " Mommy!! Look at the big F___! " I look over and the truck > driver is ROARING With laughter. > > Another friend of mine, who had an adult son with intellectual > disabilites' son was flipping people off all the time. lived > in the bible belt at the time and was the director of special > education...this gesture was absolutely not part of their family > values! He was so horrified he taped his fingers together - > something he feels horrid about now and sometimes put mittens on the > boy so you could not see the gesture. > > IT's people's reaction TO the gesture that can get kids into > trouble. They may or may not know what they're doing, but it is a > provocative gesture in this culutre and las led to many a shouting > match, fist fight, and even gun fire. > > Standing up for yourself and inciting anger are two different thngs. > I get taht our kids need a way to express just how mad they are, but > we can't control other people...so I find it wise to avoid teaching > things that may not get the desired response. > > Keep in mind, I have " Get off my back " and " Get out of my face " on > Andy's voice output. I dont' htink saying " leave me alone, please " > is appropriate. But those statements say plenty and are not > considered obscene by anyone. Rude, perhaps, but not obscene. > > FWIW, > Joan > > > > > > -------------------------------------------------- > Checkout our homepage for information, bookmarks, and photos > of our kids. Share favorite bookmarks, ideas, and other information by > including them. Don't forget, messages are a permanent record of the > archives for our list. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ > -------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 Ha! Oh my! There's this little girl in 's old school who has Ds - she's just the cutest thing, very good speech and very precocious as well. BUT, she can make a sailor blush! She's like 4 or 5! She has no problem telling you where to go and what you can do with yourself! The teachers LOVE her! Jayne I guess there's some blessings to being non-verbal, I won't have to worry about swearing at anyone! BUT, with my luck one of his few words will be a swear! KVanRyzin@... wrote: This adorable blonde hair, blue eyed boy and he is swearing and flipping off every car that went by. They all think he is waving and saying hi so they are all smiling and waving. He just kept getting more mad because he wasn't getting a reaction. LOL!! Karyn --------------------------------- Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously low rates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2006 Report Share Posted April 19, 2006 > > I can remember , at about 20 months not being able to make > the " t " and " r " sound. So we're at this light in a small lumber mill > town and a big log truck pulls up next to us. The windows are down > and the sun roof open and says (really excitedly and > loud), " Mommy!! Look at the big F___! " I look over and the truck > driver is ROARING With laughter. How funny, LOL!! I do remember my son Rick also saying something like this as we were passing by Six Flags out in the DFW area, yells out " six fags " and we had one of my nephews with us too when they were younger, so once we calmed down from laughing then my nephew said " Look at that F___! Remember it just like yesterday. Just to know where they're at about to graduate with honors too. LOL!! Thanks for the memories, needed it ARD/IEP meeting this noon so needed the smiles, been with butterflies just pray, pray & pray for 's outcome on this. He was blessed by Father Thursday night and did beautiful with the washing of his feet and everyone just complimented at the end as they remember the work it took to where he was nice and calm, such a good sports up at the alter and did not yell or kick Father. Hope everyone is doing well, will try to catch up later on. Thinking of y'all. Irma,17,DS/ASD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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