Re: Counseling and Meds- pauline

[Guest guest]

ine,

thank you so much for what you typed.... it's like you pulled the words right

out of my journal or brain..... except i can't write that eloquently..... lol I

have that backwards oklahoma hickieness to my writing.... heheheh my college

english prof's loved me..... but i sooooooo agree with you.... until ashton was

8 i thought i was supermom..... going without sleep was a part of life to

me......WRONG ANSWER.....LOL now i cry and have plenty of wine pity

parties....... (when not on meds) and it doesn't mean i dont' love her dearly,

it just means we ARE HUMAN and have feelings too......... IMAGINE

THAT.......MOMS WITH FEELINGS..... better yet allowing ourselves to realize we

have them....lol

thanks so much for sharing your words...

leah

ine Navarro wrote:

I remember reading years ago that Capone had said

counseling and meds may be helpful in dealing with the

autism and thinking " nah, I can deal.. " . Now I laugh,

thinking of all the Wellbutrin I have bought in the

last couple years and near divorce. NOT blaming !

Simply saying that my denial of how tough and

depressing and worrying this whole trip can be was

nearly my downfall.

The denial worked well for me at first, letting me

focus on what I needed to learn and start and do. But,

my advice to any new folks is that, once you are up to

speed and everything is implemented and going along

that you have decided to do.....might not be a bad

idea to give yourself a good pity party and cry with a

bunch of us.

I should have done that years ago, and now know I

avoided this group just cuz I couldn't give in to that

weakness " for fear of falling completely apart.

Couldn't do so, either, because of feeling guilty for

not being happy with just as he is. But the

problem is that I couldn't cry anywhere

else or feel sorry for myself anywhere else without

worrying that somebody would " feel sorry for me " ,

which wasn't the point, or think that somehow if I had

to do it all over again I would abort, which I

wouldn't at all, I have no regrets for the choices I

have made. Not to mention, I had to " be strong " for

everyone in our family and present a good face.

Anyway, probably more info than anyone needs, just

passing it on. I have finally learned I can feel sorry

for myself and cry and gnash my teeth and yell at God

and STILL totally love my son and be happy and no

longer have the cognitive dissonance that such sadness

and anger brings.

hugs

ine

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