Ian's 16th

[Guest guest]

I am so glad you shared your weekend with us. So is Ian going to buy

himself a dvd/vcr so he can watch his movies? Just reading your story gave me

hope that one day Trisha will have different interests but if not that is ok

too. Can you believe she will be 13 on the 18th of this month. Where did

the time fly?

Tell Ian happy belated birthday.

Carol

Trishasmom

She isn't Typical, She's Trisha!

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone,

We spent this weekend with Ian, in celebration of his 16th birthday. What an

amazing young man he is turning into. The thing I loved the most was that what

he wanted for his birthday was young man things -- a television, video games,

vcr/dvd player -- and not little boy things anymore.

We got there on Friday night, and I was so disappointed not to see him -- he was

off bowling. He didn't get back until just about bedtime, and we thought it

wouldn't be fair to him to see him than, get him all riled up and then leave

right away. We were all there -- Jim and me, Rose and , and friends who

come up for his birthday every year, Uncle , Aunt Diane, and " baby

, " who is almost 4 and certainly not a baby anymore. Baby is

autistic -- what a small world it turns out to be. and I have been

friends for 25+ years, and he was by our side all through Ian's early days --

how ironic it is that his child turns out to be autistic too. I didn't sleep

well that night, knowing Ian was only a couple of houses down and not being able

to see him. I actually thought about sneaking over there sometime after

midnight, and just peeking into his window.

I got him very early the next morning, and we all had breakfast together. Ian

usually has breakfast at his house before we even get there, and then has

another breakfast with us. He's rather like a hobbit that way. After

breakfast, we set up him new television and nintendo 64 in his room -- he was so

proud to have these things in his room, just like the other big guys in his

house. We determined that he needed a table for his television, and an antenna

because reception in the middle of that area was terrible, so we all piled into

two cars and headed for WalMart in Oneonta, and that was quite an adventure. We

got lost a few times, but finally found the WalMart -- a supercenter that was

completely overwhelming. But Ian was great. Didn't ask for a thing, which was

not at all what I'm used to when taking Ian shopping. We had lunch at

Friendly's, and went back to his residence to build the table. That was when

Ian told me he *really* wanted to be able to watch movies on his new television

-- which he had never mentioned before. We had something of a tousle about

that, until we were able to get him to understand that he had his own money with

which he could buy his own dvd/vcr player. Dinner was at Pizza Hut, and after

that, Ian was thrilled to be able to go back to his room and watch his new tv.

On Sunday, we had breakfast together again, and then got ready for his party.

Ian loved being the center of attention, but was so much more grown-up this

year. One thing that was missing this year, too, was his " girlfriend " -- who we

learned has gone home for good. Great for her (I hope), but we'll miss her. We

had a Harry Potter cake again -- we had to choose between that and Grease, the

two big themes in his life -- and ice cream, and Ian opened his presents, and

just beamed. I continue to be amazed at the level of affection and attachment

shown by the people who work with Ian at Pathfinder. His teacher and her

husband, aides who weren't on duty -- they come on their own time, they buy him

presents. They take him to their homes, they include him with their families.

They have such huge hearts, and I am so in their debt.

It was difficult to leave on Sunday, and Ian was angry that we were leaving too.

He let me hug him, and then said " Just go. " I told his 1:1 that Ian might have

trouble, but he seemed to want to be on his own. I always find it more

difficult to leave when Ian's been well-behaved, and this weekend, he was great.

Anyway, just thought I'd share the weekend with you.

CK,

Mom to Ian (2/89),

(9/90),

and Rose (6/94)

**

What fluke of genetics leads to size zero? I tremble at the future

possibilities. Size double zero. Size minus fifteen. Are we headed for a time

when we'll be embarrassed to say " I'm a size 2 " ?

--actress Harper

[Guest guest]

Once again CK, I have managed to read your posts through the stream of tears

on my face. Both tears of sadness and joy. I'm so impressed with how well

Ian is doing....and you too! Thanks for the update.

Gail :-)

Hi everyone,

We spent this weekend with Ian, in celebration of his 16th birthday. What

an amazing young man he is turning into. The thing I loved the most was that

what he wanted for his birthday was young man things -- a television, video

games, vcr/dvd player -- and not little boy things anymore.

We got there on Friday night, and I was so disappointed not to see him -- he

was off bowling. He didn't get back until just about bedtime, and we

thought it wouldn't be fair to him to see him than, get him all riled up and

then

leave right away. We were all there -- Jim and me, Rose and , and

friends who come up for his birthday every year, Uncle , Aunt Diane,

and

" baby , " who is almost 4 and certainly not a baby anymore. Baby is

autistic -- what a small world it turns out to be. and I have been

friends for 25+ years, and he was by our side all through Ian's early days --

how ironic it is that his child turns out to be autistic too. I didn't

sleep well that night, knowing Ian was only a couple of houses down and not

being

able to see him. I actually thought about sneaking over there sometime

after midnight, and just peeking into his window.

I got him very early the next morning, and we all had breakfast together.

Ian usually has breakfast at his house before we even get there, and then has

another breakfast with us. He's rather like a hobbit that way. After

breakfast, we set up him new television and nintendo 64 in his room -- he was

so

proud to have these things in his room, just like the other big guys in his

house. We determined that he needed a table for his television, and an

antenna because reception in the middle of that area was terrible, so we all

piled

into two cars and headed for WalMart in Oneonta, and that was quite an

adventure. We got lost a few times, but finally found the WalMart -- a

supercenter that was completely overwhelming. But Ian was great. Didn't ask

for a

thing, which was not at all what I'm used to when taking Ian shopping. We had

lunch at Friendly's, and went back to his residence to build the table. That

was when Ian told me he *really* wanted to be able to watch movies on his new

television -- which he had never mentioned before. We had something of a

tousle about that, until we were able to get him to understand that he had his

own money with which he could buy his own dvd/vcr player. Dinner was at

Pizza Hut, and after that, Ian was thrilled to be able to go back to his room

and watch his new tv.

On Sunday, we had breakfast together again, and then got ready for his

party. Ian loved being the center of attention, but was so much more grown-up

this year. One thing that was missing this year, too, was his " girlfriend " --

who we learned has gone home for good. Great for her (I hope), but we'll miss

her. We had a Harry Potter cake again -- we had to choose between that and

Grease, the two big themes in his life -- and ice cream, and Ian opened his

presents, and just beamed. I continue to be amazed at the level of affection

and attachment shown by the people who work with Ian at Pathfinder. His

teacher and her husband, aides who weren't on duty -- they come on their own

time, they buy him presents. They take him to their homes, they include him

with

their families. They have such huge hearts, and I am so in their debt.

It was difficult to leave on Sunday, and Ian was angry that we were leaving

too. He let me hug him, and then said " Just go. " I told his 1:1 that Ian

might have trouble, but he seemed to want to be on his own. I always find it

more difficult to leave when Ian's been well-behaved, and this weekend, he was

great.

Anyway, just thought I'd share the weekend with you.

CK,

Mom to Ian (2/89),

(9/90),

and Rose (6/94)

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/7/2005 7:12:51 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

ckc@... writes:

We determined that he needed a table for his television, and an antenna

because reception in the middle of that area was terrible, so we all piled into

two cars and headed for WalMart in Oneonta, and that was quite an adventure.

We got lost a few times, but finally found the WalMart -

LOL CK. I love the vision of everyone shopping at Walmart....;-)

Happy Birthday to Ian. Your words are so touching. I can't believe

Ian is 16!!!!

{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}

Donna

[Guest guest]

wow sounds like a wonderful time, ian is really growing up!! where on earth

did you find a nintendo 64?lol many hugs, i think as moms it is always hard

to let our children go wheather disabled or not. shawna

[Guest guest]

Hi CK,

What a difference each year. I'm not in your shoes with this hurdle

but give yourself some rewarding moments for doing the right thing

seeing all this tremendous results. I'm glad to read how Ian is a

charmer and everyone understands him.

We know its not letting any guards down as this has been some work.

Its nice for this place to help parents with special needs children

live a LESS stressful life and to help their children live more

independently and successfully. It sounds like one of their first

priority was to be able to understand his modes of learning, which

simply process the help which opens up countless windows to

learning. What a wonderful place.

Just to know, what you use to go through with him in the past to

know how much you've shared with us during his growing and learning

years. It is a loving and warming update to read how much has been

accomplished since he's been there and happy.

Glad his 16th Birthday was well spent with everyone whom he loves

and cares about in his life and be able to enjoy it.

Happy 16th Birthday and may there be many more to come.

HUGS!!

Irma,16,DS/ASD

[Guest guest]

>So is Ian going to buy himself a dvd/vcr so he can watch his movies?

That's the deal -- he requested approval so he could take some money out of his

account to buy it himself.

>where on earth did you find a nintendo 64?

It's actually one we had here but weren't using. Ian used it when he came home

to visit, so we knew he'd like it and know how to use it.

We actually heard from PV today, and Ian did not have a good evening last night.

Apparently he is upset at the absence of one of his aides, and he acted out,

tossing around some of his new stuff (including the TV and nintendo), breaking

his glasses, and regressing to some of his old behaviors. I have been trying to

call him but the line's been busy, but I do intend to see if I can find out

what's going on, from his perspective.

Thank you all for your birthday wishes for Ian.

CK,

Mom to Ian (2/89),

(9/90),

and Rose (6/94)

**

I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do

up the zipper on the back of your dress?

--actress Bette

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/16/2005 9:19:49 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

ckc@... writes:

We actually heard from PV today, and Ian did not have a good evening last

night. Apparently he is upset at the absence of one of his aides, and he

acted out, tossing around some of his new stuff (including the TV and

nintendo),

breaking his glasses, and regressing to some of his old behaviors. I have

been trying to call him but the line's been busy, but I do intend to see if I

can find out what's going on, from his perspective.

Gosh, I'm sorry CK. Isn't it incredible, the things that can set off our

kids!! Let us know what you find out.

Donna

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/16/2005 9:19:41 PM Eastern Standard Time,

ckc@... writes:

> We actually heard from PV today, and Ian did not have a good evening last

> night. Apparently he is upset at the absence of one of his aides, and he

> acted out, tossing around some of his new stuff (including the TV and

nintendo),

> breaking his glasses, and regressing to some of his old behaviors. I have

> been trying to call him but the line's been busy, but I do intend to see if I

> can find out what's going on, from his perspective.

Hi Ck,

I hope you can find out what's up with Ian. I felt so sad for him.

Charlyne

Mom to Zeb 12 DS/OCD/ASD?