Guest guest Posted October 12, 2004 Report Share Posted October 12, 2004 Donna, I know this must be hard for you right now but WOW! what a good job you have done getting him prepared for life away from home. You must be so proud of him and yourself right now. And it's not like you can't go visit or have him home to visit often. I have no clue how Trisha will do when she is 22, right now I am her life and she depends on me and looks for me. I just hope I can do as well with her as you have done with Montyman. Carol Trishasmom She isn't typical, She's Trisha! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2004 Report Share Posted October 12, 2004 I can relaate. Elie is telling us DAILY that he wants no more school. He wants to " hang with the big guys " . He goes outfor the day with his mentor and wants to spend the nite. Asks if he can stay " sleep over " and do laundry!! And Elie is only 19 - he gets to go to school this year and next - not that he is getting anything much from it. Today he hit the teacher, the teacher's aide, and one other student. Why?? the school haasn't said. Elie doesn't understand why???? Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons. >From: dtycer@... >Reply-To: >To: >Subject: *sniff* >Date: Tue, 12 Oct 2004 22:08:05 +0000 > > >Hi 'Family', > I just wanted to give you all an update on MontyMan, as you know, he >'graduated' from school last year, and has been at home with me....our >summer was great, I know he loves being at home. Well, come September, he >started to let me know in his way that he is ready to go back to >school....ok, I know he is an adult now (he is 22!!!) and there is Adult >'Day Care'....but we live in such a rural area, it is 26 miles to even the >grocery store, so travel is a must. (another story) >Anyway, because of my daughter n law who loves MM dearly, I have been >considering options for MontyMan to do something with his life besides stay >at home and boss me around. I wanted to know his options, so I have been >checking things out, but was not sure he would really like it. I didnt >think he would, but I took him last week to check it out and was really >astounded at his response! He went inside and made himself at home, like >he had been there forever! We stayed for almost 4 hours, just 'visiting', >because he didnt want to leave. I 'processed' that for about 5 days, then >took him back. He seemed so happy to be there, and I just sat and watched >him, that is, until he came to me once because he wanted me to buy him a >drink from the machine, then he escorted me to the door! He did NOT want >me there! What??? Ok, I processed THAT for about 5 days. Today we went >back, and I left the room he was in, returned about an hour later, just to >see how he was doing, and he was doing fine. I sat down and observed for >awhile, but then he SAW ME! Well, ok, now my feelings are hurt! The way >he looked when he saw me said it all!! " What is SHE doing here?!!! " >....hummmmmmmmm,......I dont know how to take this, exactly,...I am >glad/sad/shocked/understanding/NOT understanding....ha! >Well....hummmmmmm.......... > How does one 'let go'? >Donna, Montyman's Mom > > > >-------------------------------------------------- >Checkout our homepage for information, bookmarks, and photos of >our kids. Share favorite bookmarks, ideas, and other information by >including them. Don't forget, messages are a permanent record of the >archives for our list. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ >-------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2004 Report Share Posted October 12, 2004 Hi Donna, Where did you take Montyman? He is maturing and showing his independence. I couldn't tell you how to let go. I will be in that situation soon enough and I know that I won't let go easily. My life revolves around Zeb. I have been told by many that I am making a big mistake but I will deal with that when the time comes. You let go already by taking him someplace else. I hope this works out for Montyman and you find peace in his decision. Charlyne Mom to Zeb 11 DS/OCD/ASD? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2004 Report Share Posted October 12, 2004 Hi Donna, Definitley sniff at this end, right along with you. " How does one 'let go'? " , would be correct. This coming Thursday during lunch time I'm invited for a " table talk " with some coordinators on the transition after graduation. I'm trying to stay open-minded about it for any future possible options it is one hurdle I'm not ready for, but then who is? I know I still have some years to decide when I cross this bridge but before I know it will soon be here. Here you are actually confronting it with Montyman showing you how he feels about the place y'all had visit. Pretty touching story, right to the heart. Thought it was cute, too. Good luck and prayers with this major change. Lots of hugs! Irma,16,DS/ASD > Hi 'Family', > I just wanted to give you all an update on MontyMan, as you know, he 'graduated' from school last year, and has been at home with me....our summer was great, I know he loves being at home. Well, come September, he started to let me know in his way that he is ready to go back to school....ok, I know he is an adult now (he is 22!!!) and there is Adult 'Day Care'....but we live in such a rural area, it is 26 miles to even the grocery store, so travel is a must. (another story) > Anyway, because of my daughter n law who loves MM dearly, I have been considering options for MontyMan to do something with his life besides stay at home and boss me around. I wanted to know his options, so I have been checking things out, but was not sure he would really like it. I didnt think he would, but I took him last week to check it out and was really astounded at his response! He went inside and made himself at home, like he had been there forever! We stayed for almost 4 hours, just 'visiting', because he didnt want to leave. I 'processed' that for about 5 days, then took him back. He seemed so happy to be there, and I just sat and watched him, that is, until he came to me once because he wanted me to buy him a drink from the machine, then he escorted me to the door! He did NOT want me there! What??? Ok, I processed THAT for about 5 days. Today we went back, and I left the room he was in, returned about an hour later, just to see how he was doing, and he was doing fine. I sat down and observed for awhile, but then he SAW ME! Well, ok, now my feelings are hurt! The way he looked when he saw me said it all!! " What is SHE doing here?!!! " ....hummmmmmmmm,......I dont know how to take this, exactly,...I am glad/sad/shocked/understanding/NOT understanding....ha! Well....hummmmmmm.......... > How does one 'let go'? > Donna, Montyman's Mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 13, 2004 Report Share Posted October 13, 2004 In a message dated 10/12/2004 6:08:58 PM Eastern Daylight Time, dtycer@... writes: I am glad/sad/shocked/understanding/NOT understanding....ha! Well....hummmmmmm.......... How does one 'let go'? {{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} Donna!!!! We let go, but our hearts never do. IF Monteyman is happy, you'll eventually adapt. I'm years away from that...but many days it doesn't feel like it. Keep us posted. Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 13, 2004 Report Share Posted October 13, 2004 HUGS!!!!!!!!! As nathan is only 13 im not at where you are yet, but i understand how hard it must be, i cant imagine life without my nathanguy here, many hugs ofcourse, take it one trip at a time, he is just growing up. make sure he knows how much you love him and miss him, but are happy that he enjoys being grown up and going on his own. shawna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 13, 2004 Report Share Posted October 13, 2004 Thank you so much for the hugs, Donna, and the encouragement from each of the other responses.......Carol, your's also brought tears to my eyes, because I never even THOUGHT of being proud of me.....MontyMan, yeah,....but I did not look at the situation the way you did, wow, to think that because Montyman is secure in who he is, that it is ok to BE away from MOM.....*sniff*....it is true that it is just that they DO depend on us, and STILL do,.....but letting them have their own space and things......hummmmmmmm..........today I took him to 'work' and he rode the van home. Now, THAT was a HUGE step for me!! Well, he did just fine, and I know he enjoyed the day. I took him a bit late so I wouldnt be away from him ALL day...hee hee......I did go look at the group home, and I am just not even ready to deal with that. Today I came home and got busy in the yards and played with my horses some just to not worry or think. The weather is awesome right now, so it was a nice day, the time passed quickly, and I know MontyMan had a good day! *sniff* Donna, MontyMan's Mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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