doing less damage

[Guest guest]

I have a sister who I belive can be described as having the same

characteristics as an HFA individual. I know for sure that my (and

families) reactions and resulting feelings are that of other NT's who

are in relationships with HFA's as described in articles and intranet

communications. At this point, I am holding onto a thread that is not

even there anymore. I'm done, cooked, had it, drained. I don't like

that feeling and I am looking for a way through this, not around it

because she is my sister and I love her and I know she has lot's of

feelings that I can't seem to help with or understand, and I have them

too and need something for me in this relationship. I recently looked

up AS and was able to for the first time in my life, see that others are

also having the same experiences. I realize now, that I can't talk to

her with the same expectations I have when communicating with other NT's

and that I can find a way to communicate with her that is more sensitive

and kind to both of us. Having the awareness that I have been able to

make a diagnosis to find a possible path with more answers than I had

before, I am encouraged. Yet, I still don't know what to say or do. I

know I can't say " hey, I know what our problem has been, you have AS and

we are different and there is a way we can begin again! " NOT the way to

do. Sooo.......where do I begin. Or what can I expect, do, be the next

time we naturally meet. We live far away from each other, and would see

eachother naturally at an annual gathering over the summer. We have not

communicated over the phone or email in the last 2 years. The last time

I tried that a couple weeks ago was not pretty and was caused me to

looked deeper into the possiblities and is when I read about HFAs. Any

advice, guideance? It sounds like the person with AS, if they can deal

with what they have, is key to awareness and working together on the

communication, so what about someone you suspect has it and you can't

let them know?

Thanks,

and not mean