Guest guest Posted March 19, 2005 Report Share Posted March 19, 2005 Dear Kay and Cindi and all, We are two or so hours from Columbia, SC up the mountain in Asheville, NC. Thanks for the tip about the zoo, it sounds great. Kay, thanks for your thoughts about separating your triplets. We have twins, Hannah and Eli, who are starting kindergarten this August - they have an older brother who will be in 3rd grade. We discussed having Eli in a separate school too - he has DS - but I hated the thought of him being so separate from his siblings. After visiting our local school's special needs teachers (they spent a long with me going over their programs and philosophy), I was very pleased and comfortable - and he's only a hall away from his sister. It was sort of a pre-IEP meeting (or as I called it " Give Mom a Valium Meeting " ! and Hannah want Eli to ride the regular bus too (even the neighborhood kids came over to tell me they would watch over him if he rode their bus - how sweet). We'll see about that one! Good thoughts and wishes to all. in Asheville Mom to - 8 and Hannah and Eli - almost 5 separating triplets > > Cindi, > We separated our triplets when they started Kindergarten this past Fall. > My husband and I debated initially as to whether to send the two to > parochial school and to public to get her services/therapy. I > fought that because I at least wanted them in the same school if for no > other reason than practicality (I'm a project manager). I also didn't > want asking later in life why we separated only her. I didn't think > it was fair to have the two in one school AND in one classroom and > going somewhere completely different. > > Now, they are definitely three unique individuals, outgoing & quick > learner, shy, outgoing needing help. So, we decided to separate them so > they can blossom on their own and it's working wonderfully. They see > each other before school, in the lunchroom, and always find each other > on the playground at recess time. (They have told me that they look > first for each other to play with.) They really do have a strong bond > and look out for each other and are always there for each other. I could > go on about the little things they do and care for each other about even > though they are not in the same classroom. > > Every family is different though and you certainly should do what you > think is best for your kids. > > P.S. How do you get three jabber boxes to shut up at the breakfast or > dinner table long enough to finish a meal?? ) They just have so much > to talk about regarding school or to tell me at dinner time!! > > > Kay Tiernan, Mom to Jon, , (DS) 5 yrs old, Arlington, VA > > > ________________________________________________________________________ > ________________________________________________________________________ > > > Multiples-DS > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Multiples-DS > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2005 Report Share Posted March 19, 2005 Hi & Everyone, Thought I would mention that my twin girls who are 30 months, both ride the bus (along with their car seats, too) every day to/from preschool. They have been since they turned 2 yrs in September. It's not a long bus ride at all. It was easy because the twins have each other while they are on the bus. To make an easier transition, I started out driving them to school the first week in the morning and then the afternoon bus would bring them home. The following week, the bus started driving them both ways. They never even cried or seemed worried. It was like an adventure for them. Just wanted to put my two cents in if you are on the fence about it. If your other kids and their friends will be on the same bus, well, that makes it so much easier! It ended up being harder for me than for the twins! Also, to those that helped me with my defending my twins' (Haley & Nikki) rights to being placed together in a classroom at school, thank you so much! The schools around here tend to want to automatically separate multiples from each other during school as Kay mentioned in a previous email. Personally, I think it is discrimmatory, especially if they don't really have a compelling reason to separate. Here is the criteria I looked at (from various sources) to make my decision: 1. Monozygotic - Identical twins from the same placenta especially need to be able to check on each other occasionally in the early years. A baby thinks they're still physically connected to their mother until they are 18 months. I believe this is also true for twins feeling this way about each other, too. Due to our twins' delays, I believe they think they are still "physically connected" to each other. 2. Preemies & DS Diagnoses - Significant developmental delays. 3. Quarantined for medical reasons during the first 1 1/2 years of life- Never been apart for that long on a consistent basis. 4. They don't exhibit harmful competition, much less any competition, with one another. 5. They don't speak for each other. There's not one that is the leader and one that is the follower. They enjoy parallel play and share toys, food, drink, etc. 6. They don't exhibit any "twin speak" that keeps others out of their circle of space. They include (their brother) and classmates. Most recently, Haley engaged with in "twin speak." (Not really twin speak now, is it?) 7. A forced separation could be devastating and severely traumatic if split too early; may feel that they did something wrong and that's why access to twin has been taken away. They can be further distracted in the classroom without each other, "What's my twin doing? Where is she? Why aren't we together? Were we separated because we were bad? They can suffer irrevocable emotional stress from worry and find it difficult or impossible to do their school work. An unpleasant early school experience sets the stage for future academic and social problems. 8. Their teacher has consistently shown that she can continue to foster Haley & Nikki's individuality while in the same classroom. 9. Forcing them to separate can be discriminatory; that being a multiple is an inherent condition of birth like race or gender. 10. No apparent problems or reasons for separation. Unless there is a compelling reason to separate them, the Natl Org. of Mothers of Twins Clubs & other experts advocate keeping them together, especially in the early years. There are hundreds of small reasons why staying together is a benefit, and one very significant factor: the unique and special relationship that twins share with each other. I hope I haven't dragged this email out too much. Just wanted to spread the word on my research. Thanks again to all who chimed in to help. BTW, Nikki has her neurological follow-up on 3/25. She hasn't had another seizure since 2/15; hopefully it was a febrile seizure and we've seen the last of them! Thanks for all your prayers and good thoughts! Can't wait for spring and getting settled into a new home! Regards, Granata Mom to Haley & Nikki, 30 mos twin girls, both w/DS, & , 11 mos. son Fairfax, VA separating triplets>> Cindi,> We separated our triplets when they started Kindergarten this past Fall.> My husband and I debated initially as to whether to send the two to> parochial school and to public to get her services/therapy. I> fought that because I at least wanted them in the same school if for no> other reason than practicality (I'm a project manager). I also didn't> want asking later in life why we separated only her. I didn't think> it was fair to have the two in one school AND in one classroom and > going somewhere completely different.>> Now, they are definitely three unique individuals, outgoing & quick> learner, shy, outgoing needing help. So, we decided to separate them so> they can blossom on their own and it's working wonderfully. They see> each other before school, in the lunchroom, and always find each other> on the playground at recess time. (They have told me that they look> first for each other to play with.) They really do have a strong bond> and look out for each other and are always there for each other. I could> go on about the little things they do and care for each other about even> though they are not in the same classroom.>> Every family is different though and you certainly should do what you> think is best for your kids.>> P.S. How do you get three jabber boxes to shut up at the breakfast or> dinner table long enough to finish a meal?? ) They just have so much> to talk about regarding school or to tell me at dinner time!!>>> Kay Tiernan, Mom to Jon, , (DS) 5 yrs old, Arlington, VA>>> ________________________________________________________________________> ________________________________________________________________________>>> Multiples-DS> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Multiples-DS> ------------------------------------------------------------------------> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 22, 2005 Report Share Posted March 22, 2005 , Who could argue w/ that research, good for you. Irene Jake 8 Zack DS, Nick, & 6 separating triplets>> Cindi,> We separated our triplets when they started Kindergarten this past Fall.> My husband and I debated initially as to whether to send the two to> parochial school and to public to get her services/therapy. I> fought that because I at least wanted them in the same school if for no> other reason than practicality (I'm a project manager). I also didn't> want asking later in life why we separated only her. I didn't think> it was fair to have the two in one school AND in one classroom and > going somewhere completely different.>> Now, they are definitely three unique individuals, outgoing & quick> learner, shy, outgoing needing help. So, we decided to separate them so> they can blossom on their own and it's working wonderfully. They see> each other before school, in the lunchroom, and always find each other> on the playground at recess time. (They have told me that they look> first for each other to play with.) They really do have a strong bond> and look out for each other and are always there for each other. I could> go on about the little things they do and care for each other about even> though they are not in the same classroom.>> Every family is different though and you certainly should do what you> think is best for your kids.>> P.S. How do you get three jabber boxes to shut up at the breakfast or> dinner table long enough to finish a meal?? ) They just have so much> to talk about regarding school or to tell me at dinner time!!>>> Kay Tiernan, Mom to Jon, , (DS) 5 yrs old, Arlington, VA>>> ________________________________________________________________________> ________________________________________________________________________>>> Multiples-DS> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Multiples-DS> ------------------------------------------------------------------------> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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