Death and Mourning (for Marte)

July 12, 2007

Dear Marte, et al,

Synchronistically, I am listening to a Nirvana album right now

(Incesticide, in case anyone else is a fan) and as Kurdt Kobain committed

suicide at the peak of his fame, this post seems timely. It is taken from “To

Be a Jew” by Rabbi Hayim Halevy Donin:

‘The Jewish tradition cherishes life. The Torah was given to Israel so that “you

shall live” by the teachings and “not die through them.”

Death has no virtue since “The dead cannot praise the Lord …”

(Psalms 115:17).

Nevertheless, the Jewish tradition has been realistic about death. “For

dust you are and to dust you shall return” (Genesis 3:19), “but the

spirit returns to G-d who gave it” (Ecclesiastes 12:7). “The end of

man is death,” said Rabbi Johanan (Berakhot 17a). Simply put, we shall

all die.

In itself, death is not a tragedy. What we call a “tragic death”

is determined by the untimely nature of the death or the unfortunate

circumstances surrounding it. When a peaceful death follows a long life which

was blessed with good health and vitality of mind and body, a life rich in good

deeds, then death cannot be regarded as tragic – no matter how great the

loss and the sorrow. “Blessed is he that has been reared in the Torah and

whose toil is in the Torah, and acts so as to please his Creator, and has grown

up with a good name and departed with a good name. Concerning him, said,

‘A good name is better than precious oil; and the day of death than the day

of one’s birth’ (Ecclesiates 7:1)” (Berakhot 17a).

The world we live in is viewed as a corridor that leads to yet another

world. The belief in an afterlife, in a world to come (Olam Haba) where man is

judged and where his soul continues to flourish is imbedded in Jewish thought. “All

Israel

have a share in the world to come” (Mishna Sanhedrin 11:1).

But the worthier the individual, the greater is his loss to the living.

The more he meant to those about him – family, friends, community, the

deeper the grief and sharper the anguish. The traditional Jewish observances

surrounding death and mourning address themselves to maintaining the dignity of

the deceased and to comforting the pain of the mourners.

fa

" Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you. " CG Jung

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