Re: hello, Family, from Ken(the squarehead_ {{{KEN}}}

[Guest guest]

Hi Ya Buddy! I guess I was brought up old school like you. My dad

was an alcoholic, and mama could have said a LOT of bad things about

him to us kids, but she didn't. What really tee's me off, is the

commercials- like the cell phone one? The guy gets his snotty little

teens new cell phones, which they snatch out of his hand, look at him

like he's the village idiot, and priss off- no thank you, no nothing.

I agree with you, so many commercials portray men as being one step

up from a neanderthal, with their wives and kids disrespecting them.

There are a lot of good guys out there (LIKE YOU!!!) who don't get

enough credit. My brothers are all hard workers, good providers, and

good men, who go out of their way to do for their wives and children.

Then there are the commercials that make women look like a bunch of

PMS'ing shrews who are incapable of making any decision more complex

than what color of nail polish to wear! I guess that's why I watch

PBS a lot....Antiques Roadshow and History Detectives ROCK!

Hugs from Texas

Jane

]

> Greetings to my Family!

> I woke this morning, in pain, as usual, and as I sat there,

listening to the rain coming down upon my roof, I got to thinking.

There's been an awful lot of rain this summer, more than we've ever

had. Listening to the rain often makes me feel " melencholy " , brings

back lots of memories, yet, at the same time it's kind of comforting,

hearing it, knowing you are warm and dry, not out in it (done a lot

of camping in my life...it's kind of like being in a tent, when you

live in a mobile home)

> Then, I thought about this " Husband " thing, that's got

everybody in an uproar.I KNOW that I am different. Enough people have

told me that, so I tend to kind of believe it. But, is it because I

have R.A?I don't know.

> What I DO know, is that I can't " identify " with most men, can't

figure out their " thought processes, or answer why they do the things

they do!

> .But I say to myself: " Surely I am not alone! Surely, not ALL men

are like this! "

> I am going to pose a question to ALL of you, and it is my

sincere hopes that you answer me........When you turn on the

television, has anyone else but ME noticed how the Media " Male

Bashes? " Has anyone ELSE noticed HOW the t.v.uses male bashing in

their advertisements?The media is a powerful tool. It affects the

subconcious of most people. I don't know how many of you remember

this, it happened a long time ago, but " the Law " had to step in and

deny the media the right to use " subliminal advertising " ,on T.V., in

stores, and on billboards! Really!What IS subliminal advertising? you

might ask?It's when a messege is flashed so fast that your concious

mind can't recognize it, but your subconcious CAN.!R.C Cola is a

perfect example....they had a picture of a beautiful girl showing,

did a " close up " on her lips...and the word " sex " was imprinted

there. NOT so you could see it with your concious mind. Stores were

notorious for including in their " music " little phrases such as " buy

this

> product " , naming the product.

> It was said so quickly the ordinary mind couldn't pick it up!

> Why am I telling you all this? Because, if you really sit down, and

honestly think about it, tell me....how many commercials show a man

as even a little smart? Instead, they show some guy rolling around on

his lawn tractor, saying " somebody help me " , after he has shown you

his new car, his new house, his nice neighborhood, and telling you

he's in debt up to his eyeballs. They show two little boys, hanging

upside down on a set of monkey bars, holding a " new " style of mustard

called " upside down " mustard, and one says to the other " I don't get

it " ...and some little girl shows up, grabs the bottle, shows the boys

how to use it, and contempt in her voice, she merely

says " Boys! " .....I wonder what that DOES to the mind of a child that

age? If people see it on t.v., they tend to soak it up, and believe

it! And I personally don't think all men are as dumb as they are

portrayed!

> Boys are taught from an early age that it " isn't allowed " for

them to show emotion, to cry, to feel.I wonder what that does to

them....especially when they are told they are stupid,told that to be

any way otherwise makes them " sissies " ?

> Do me a favor...try this little experiment: next time you turn

on the t.v., now that you have been " told " about it, try and count

how many commercials show some kind of portrayal of men being weak,

stupid, dumb, unable to do even the simplest task with out help? I'd

really like to know if you see the same thing I see?

> Not ALL of us ARE that way. Some, like I, actually DO the

dishes, vacuum the floor, and be supportive to their wife, weather

they are sick or not.Personally, when I married Tammy, I told her I

would never tell her what to do, unless it was for her own safety,:

She is my PARTNER, not my handy live in slave!SHE goes to work, and I

stay home...(R.A.) Hahaha....she calls me her little " house bitch " (in

fun, of course....but you know what? Most nights we go to bed

laughing, and that's how we wake up too!

> T.V would have you believe I never grew up) haha! So do this

little experiment for me...watch the t.v ....tell me how many times

YOU see " male bashing " ...and e-mail me back with your responses to

all of this please?

> All my love to all of you......squarehead ken

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> for Mobile

> Take with you! Check email on your mobile phone.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Ya Buddy! I guess I was brought up old school like you. My dad

was an alcoholic, and mama could have said a LOT of bad things about

him to us kids, but she didn't. What really tee's me off, is the

commercials- like the cell phone one? The guy gets his snotty little

teens new cell phones, which they snatch out of his hand, look at him

like he's the village idiot, and priss off- no thank you, no nothing.

I agree with you, so many commercials portray men as being one step

up from a neanderthal, with their wives and kids disrespecting them.

There are a lot of good guys out there (LIKE YOU!!!) who don't get

enough credit. My brothers are all hard workers, good providers, and

good men, who go out of their way to do for their wives and children.

Then there are the commercials that make women look like a bunch of

PMS'ing shrews who are incapable of making any decision more complex

than what color of nail polish to wear! I guess that's why I watch

PBS a lot....Antiques Roadshow and History Detectives ROCK!

Hugs from Texas

Jane

]

> Greetings to my Family!

> I woke this morning, in pain, as usual, and as I sat there,

listening to the rain coming down upon my roof, I got to thinking.

There's been an awful lot of rain this summer, more than we've ever

had. Listening to the rain often makes me feel " melencholy " , brings

back lots of memories, yet, at the same time it's kind of comforting,

hearing it, knowing you are warm and dry, not out in it (done a lot

of camping in my life...it's kind of like being in a tent, when you

live in a mobile home)

> Then, I thought about this " Husband " thing, that's got

everybody in an uproar.I KNOW that I am different. Enough people have

told me that, so I tend to kind of believe it. But, is it because I

have R.A?I don't know.

> What I DO know, is that I can't " identify " with most men, can't

figure out their " thought processes, or answer why they do the things

they do!

> .But I say to myself: " Surely I am not alone! Surely, not ALL men

are like this! "

> I am going to pose a question to ALL of you, and it is my

sincere hopes that you answer me........When you turn on the

television, has anyone else but ME noticed how the Media " Male

Bashes? " Has anyone ELSE noticed HOW the t.v.uses male bashing in

their advertisements?The media is a powerful tool. It affects the

subconcious of most people. I don't know how many of you remember

this, it happened a long time ago, but " the Law " had to step in and

deny the media the right to use " subliminal advertising " ,on T.V., in

stores, and on billboards! Really!What IS subliminal advertising? you

might ask?It's when a messege is flashed so fast that your concious

mind can't recognize it, but your subconcious CAN.!R.C Cola is a

perfect example....they had a picture of a beautiful girl showing,

did a " close up " on her lips...and the word " sex " was imprinted

there. NOT so you could see it with your concious mind. Stores were

notorious for including in their " music " little phrases such as " buy

this

> product " , naming the product.

> It was said so quickly the ordinary mind couldn't pick it up!

> Why am I telling you all this? Because, if you really sit down, and

honestly think about it, tell me....how many commercials show a man

as even a little smart? Instead, they show some guy rolling around on

his lawn tractor, saying " somebody help me " , after he has shown you

his new car, his new house, his nice neighborhood, and telling you

he's in debt up to his eyeballs. They show two little boys, hanging

upside down on a set of monkey bars, holding a " new " style of mustard

called " upside down " mustard, and one says to the other " I don't get

it " ...and some little girl shows up, grabs the bottle, shows the boys

how to use it, and contempt in her voice, she merely

says " Boys! " .....I wonder what that DOES to the mind of a child that

age? If people see it on t.v., they tend to soak it up, and believe

it! And I personally don't think all men are as dumb as they are

portrayed!

> Boys are taught from an early age that it " isn't allowed " for

them to show emotion, to cry, to feel.I wonder what that does to

them....especially when they are told they are stupid,told that to be

any way otherwise makes them " sissies " ?

> Do me a favor...try this little experiment: next time you turn

on the t.v., now that you have been " told " about it, try and count

how many commercials show some kind of portrayal of men being weak,

stupid, dumb, unable to do even the simplest task with out help? I'd

really like to know if you see the same thing I see?

> Not ALL of us ARE that way. Some, like I, actually DO the

dishes, vacuum the floor, and be supportive to their wife, weather

they are sick or not.Personally, when I married Tammy, I told her I

would never tell her what to do, unless it was for her own safety,:

She is my PARTNER, not my handy live in slave!SHE goes to work, and I

stay home...(R.A.) Hahaha....she calls me her little " house bitch " (in

fun, of course....but you know what? Most nights we go to bed

laughing, and that's how we wake up too!

> T.V would have you believe I never grew up) haha! So do this

little experiment for me...watch the t.v ....tell me how many times

YOU see " male bashing " ...and e-mail me back with your responses to

all of this please?

> All my love to all of you......squarehead ken

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> for Mobile

> Take with you! Check email on your mobile phone.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hey Ken,

I am probably speaking on old news here and sort of feel responsible

for the topic, but I just wanted you to know even in the midst of my

marital problems I don't feel all men are that way and I am hoping

that to be the case. I know there are some really supportive ones

out there. In my opinion, I do feel the RA has made you more

sensitive and that doesn't take away from who you were before RA.

My husband is as healthy as they come, and has a very hard time

grasping a condition lasting so long. He has just run out of

patience and ready for it to be cured already. However, my situation

is so much more complicated than a simple e-mail or post could

explain so to all the men out there, please, don't be offended by

things said regarding marriage. It only applies to the individual

situation.

Also, I am with you on the portrayal of men. I get so mad at those

commercials. I refuse to believe men are that primitive. I just

can't accept that. However, my husband loves those commercials and

actually barks like a seal (Navy man) at some of them. Some men like

that macho description of men. Some women love it when they have a

macho, air-head man and if that's what you like, go for it. We all

have our preferences. I just happen not be one of them. That isn't

my husband fault nor mine. However, I must say some men will behave

the way you want them to until they feel they have you. Now that's

deception.

It is so much more than what can be discussed here. In my opinion,

it does have to do with upbringing and even culture, or whether you

witness a healthy relationship while growing up, or whether your

family has been split so many times and your family is so extended

you forget who is related to whom.

I think my husband is a decent man and at one point obviously was

supportive. He is however, easily swayed and loyalites divided, ( a

house divided is a house that falls apart) I do have a lot of

meddling in-laws so now he believes RA is made up, that I can stop it

at any time. So, does that make him a bad person. I don't think

so. However I do feel if I allow it to continue, then I am to blame,

and I should have noticed those traits before marrying.

Also, in my opinon, personality type, coping skills, how well do you

function under pressure, or how well do you handle stress, do you

have the capacity to love and respect ( a big one for me) through

sickness as well as health -- all of those things have a lot to do

with how your husband or your wife will support you through the hard

times. So the answer is choose your mate very carefully.

In my opinion, people marry the wrong people for the wrong reasons,

me included so when the tough stuff comes up in the marriage and they

ALWays will, and since the marriage was never built on solid ground

so it doesn't stand up to the tough stuff. It doesn't mean anyone is

to blame. Just not a good match for each other and each other's

needs. Now does it make it any easier to accept divorce? Nope. But

just know that each situation is as varied as the individual.

Well, that's my take on it. I hope all is well here at the site.

God bless and take care.

Ebony

[Guest guest]

Hey Ken,

I am probably speaking on old news here and sort of feel responsible

for the topic, but I just wanted you to know even in the midst of my

marital problems I don't feel all men are that way and I am hoping

that to be the case. I know there are some really supportive ones

out there. In my opinion, I do feel the RA has made you more

sensitive and that doesn't take away from who you were before RA.

My husband is as healthy as they come, and has a very hard time

grasping a condition lasting so long. He has just run out of

patience and ready for it to be cured already. However, my situation

is so much more complicated than a simple e-mail or post could

explain so to all the men out there, please, don't be offended by

things said regarding marriage. It only applies to the individual

situation.

Also, I am with you on the portrayal of men. I get so mad at those

commercials. I refuse to believe men are that primitive. I just

can't accept that. However, my husband loves those commercials and

actually barks like a seal (Navy man) at some of them. Some men like

that macho description of men. Some women love it when they have a

macho, air-head man and if that's what you like, go for it. We all

have our preferences. I just happen not be one of them. That isn't

my husband fault nor mine. However, I must say some men will behave

the way you want them to until they feel they have you. Now that's

deception.

It is so much more than what can be discussed here. In my opinion,

it does have to do with upbringing and even culture, or whether you

witness a healthy relationship while growing up, or whether your

family has been split so many times and your family is so extended

you forget who is related to whom.

I think my husband is a decent man and at one point obviously was

supportive. He is however, easily swayed and loyalites divided, ( a

house divided is a house that falls apart) I do have a lot of

meddling in-laws so now he believes RA is made up, that I can stop it

at any time. So, does that make him a bad person. I don't think

so. However I do feel if I allow it to continue, then I am to blame,

and I should have noticed those traits before marrying.

Also, in my opinon, personality type, coping skills, how well do you

function under pressure, or how well do you handle stress, do you

have the capacity to love and respect ( a big one for me) through

sickness as well as health -- all of those things have a lot to do

with how your husband or your wife will support you through the hard

times. So the answer is choose your mate very carefully.

In my opinion, people marry the wrong people for the wrong reasons,

me included so when the tough stuff comes up in the marriage and they

ALWays will, and since the marriage was never built on solid ground

so it doesn't stand up to the tough stuff. It doesn't mean anyone is

to blame. Just not a good match for each other and each other's

needs. Now does it make it any easier to accept divorce? Nope. But

just know that each situation is as varied as the individual.

Well, that's my take on it. I hope all is well here at the site.

God bless and take care.

Ebony