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Re: Too long of visit

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,

I had to laugh with great empathy for your situation. I remember going home for

the first time after so much therapy and I booked the ticket for 11 days!!!!!!!!

of pure HELL. NEVER AGAIN! I keep it to 3 days and traveling on the fourth.

That is pushing now with family I do/used to keep up with.

YOU ARE DOING REMARKABLY WELL!! Tell that to yourself, as it is true. Hell, I

would have been snortin' that xanax and drinking all the REAL egg nog being

around my famille. YUCK!! kidding.

I was so touched by your very simple, yet, loving request (and you knew what you

wanted to do and spoke up) about going to church! That just touched me in a

special way, the way you wrote it. Next Christmas will be different without

them or a 2 day visit. That will get their attention.

Merry Belated Party Christmas.

Greg.

Too long of visit

A week is too long to visit my FOO. My God the drama. In the past it

may have seemed normal to me, but I have changed so much and it makes

me crazy. I have handled it by Xanax and eating all the left overs. I

think I gained 3 pounds. I still think I have done better than a year

ago.

Got here Thursday evening and cleaned and cooked for 3 1/2 days. Some

vacation yeh? Xmas day I had to resort to Xanax. Yesterday my sister

was on the phone for 3 hours to everyone in the family roomenating the

story of her sons abuse on Xanax and alcohol. I got told what I wanted

to do was a NO. I wanted to go to church Xmas eve. I got told do not

add to my stress, She is trying to please everyone. Everyone but me,

who she sees twice a year. This was my time to relax and have fun and

it was wasted on my family. NEVER again, but we already established

that before I came down here. I won't see her for awhile and when I do

it will be for like 3 days. Sorry, my busy schedule just won't allow it.

__________________________________________________

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Hopefully three days and a rental car. One rule I learned w/my FOO is

to always have my own transportation and never rely on them to get me

from here to there- like on Christmas Eve. That's really sucky that

she wouldn't let you borrow the car or anything. What the heck? But I

learned that after a few times of being stranded around nada and

whatnot and I just don't do that to myself anymore- always have to

have an escape route- always. A car is the most basic of escape

routes. Ever since I told my cousin that one for when she visits her

nada and FOO, its been a lot let stressful for her (though her nada

hates it and pulls a lot more passive-aggressive crap).

I feel for you. Thanks for sharing.Even amidst my family's current

round of coughs and colds, I'm glad to have that and a rather boring

holiday vs one around my FOO. Ulk!

Kerrie

>

>

>

> A week is too long to visit my FOO. My God the drama. In the past

it

> may have seemed normal to me, but I have changed so much and it

makes

> me crazy. I have handled it by Xanax and eating all the left overs.

I

> think I gained 3 pounds. I still think I have done better than a

year

> ago.

>

> Got here Thursday evening and cleaned and cooked for 3 1/2 days.

Some

> vacation yeh? Xmas day I had to resort to Xanax. Yesterday my

sister

> was on the phone for 3 hours to everyone in the family roomenating

the

> story of her sons abuse on Xanax and alcohol. I got told what I

wanted

> to do was a NO. I wanted to go to church Xmas eve. I got told do

not

> add to my stress, She is trying to please everyone. Everyone but

me,

> who she sees twice a year. This was my time to relax and have fun

and

> it was wasted on my family. NEVER again, but we already established

> that before I came down here. I won't see her for awhile and when I

do

> it will be for like 3 days. Sorry, my busy schedule just won't

allow it.

>

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, I am glad you are establishing boundaries and respecting

yourself. Look at it like this, so you may have gained 3 lbs and

popped a few pill who cares? The good news is this you can see this

is very abnormal behavior what they are doing! That is far beyond

anything! That is so cool! So you had to self medicate on left overs

for a few days you are out of there and you don't have to go back.

Mashed potatoes are the ultimate comfort food. ;-) you were just

making sure your were comforted. I love to self medicate on coffee

all the time lol. I am glad you are you! And I am glad you are

back. Love Lizzy

>

>

>

> A week is too long to visit my FOO. My God the drama. In the

past it

> may have seemed normal to me, but I have changed so much and it

makes

> me crazy. I have handled it by Xanax and eating all the left

overs. I

> think I gained 3 pounds. I still think I have done better than a

year

> ago.

>

> Got here Thursday evening and cleaned and cooked for 3 1/2 days.

Some

> vacation yeh? Xmas day I had to resort to Xanax. Yesterday my

sister

> was on the phone for 3 hours to everyone in the family roomenating

the

> story of her sons abuse on Xanax and alcohol. I got told what I

wanted

> to do was a NO. I wanted to go to church Xmas eve. I got told do

not

> add to my stress, She is trying to please everyone. Everyone but

me,

> who she sees twice a year. This was my time to relax and have fun

and

> it was wasted on my family. NEVER again, but we already

established

> that before I came down here. I won't see her for awhile and when

I do

> it will be for like 3 days. Sorry, my busy schedule just won't

allow it.

>

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