Me and my boyfriend have a question

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Our situation is that my mother most definitely has BPD and I (being

raised by her) either have BPD myself or at least have BPD tendencies.

I'm in a relationship with a guy who has been absolutely great and

supportive even though I have put him through hell. In our

relationship I tend to go through phases or mood swings (whatever you

want to call them). One of the phases I go through is I start

thinking that everything in our relationship is horrible and can't be

fixed and that it was always horrible and I start thinking back to

previous fights and thinking that that is how it all has been all the

time. So with this I freak out and leave. I've done this 3 or 4

times. And we amazingly get back together and things are great. This

time around I have recognized that my mom has BPD and that I have

those same tendencies and I am planning on going to a therapist after

I move in with my boyfriend again. We are both concerned that I'm

going to get into this mode again and end up splitting even though

that is not what I really want.

Our question is what are some techniques that we could maybe use when

I get this way and what are some methods that others have used to deal

with the same or similar situations? Is recognizing it now going to

help with it or is it something that I'm just always bound to do

again? My boyfriend and I were thinking of maybe some sort of signal

when I get this way. Is that effective or am I already lost by that

point? Any help with this would be greatly appreciated.