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Snap, Crackle & Pop - RA and Joints

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Hello.

I still feel like a newbie and have so much to learn. I could read

and read and read.....and still feel like I haven't even begun to

understand this disease.

I have noticed that since my flare up I've been in since December

that my joints will pop or click when I stand up, move, etc. Is

this common? Of course, I never think of these things until after

I've left my Rheumy's office and have another 6 weeks to wait and

see her again.

Another question I had was about depression. I was diagnosed about

2 months ago with RA, and have been experiencing a lot of

resentment, depression and anger about this recently. I think I was

in shock initially, and it's just now sinking in. For about a year

and a half prior to being diagnosed with RA, I had managed to lose

160 pounds and regain my health. I was working out at the gym 6-7

times a day, running and lifting weights. For the first time in

more than 20 years, I was healthy and felt as though I had no

limitations as to what I could do. Then, out of nowhere I get

diagnosed with RA. I literally couldn't get out of bed one day.

It's not like it progressed....it just struck me down with no prior

indication. I feel totally ripped off. For the first time in my

kids life, I was physically able to participate in sports and

activities with them....and now I can't do it again. This is so

irritating. I was training to run a marathon this year. I was

planning on climbing a mountain. I lived as a prisoner in my body

for more than 20 years, was let out for a brief period of time, and

now feel like I'm restricted again.

I need time to wrap my brain around all of this. I don't mean to be

a downer or negative. I am so grateful that I am not wheelchair

bound and that I can atleast hobble around on a good day. Things

can always be worse, right? I am trying desperately to focus on

what I have.....but it's very difficult to get used to what I don't

have anymore.

Thanks for listening....I needed to vent today.

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