Guest guest Posted December 16, 2006 Report Share Posted December 16, 2006 Thanks for sharing this again w/the group Sylvia. That's such an incredibly awesome story and I did need to read it tonight. Thanks so much! Kerrie > > Fellow KOs, > > Our former moderator, Edith, posted this fable on our board. I just > came across it, and wanted to share it with those of you who have > not read it before. It portrays the struggle we KOs have to go > through when we establish our lives independent of our BP parent. > > " The Bridge " > > There was a man who had given much thought to what he wanted > from life. He had experienced many moods and trials. He had > experimented with different ways of living, and he had had his > share of both success and failure. At last, he began to see > clearly where he wanted to go. > > Diligently, he searched for the right opportunity. Sometimes he > came close, only to be pushed away. Often he applied all his > strength and imagination, only to find the path hopelessly > blocked. And then at last it came. But the opportunity would not > wait. It would be made available only for a short time. If it > were seen that he was not committed, the opportunity would not > come again. > > Eager to arrive, he started on his journey. With each step, he > wanted to move faster; with each thought about his goal, his > heart beat quicker; with each vision of what lay ahead, he found > renewed vigor. Strength that had left him since his early youth > returned, and desires, all kinds of desires, reawakened from > their long-dormant positions. > > Hurrying along, he came upon a bridge that crossed through the > middle of a town. It had been built high above a river in order > to protect it from the floods of spring. > > He started across. Then he noticed someone coming from the > opposite direction. As they moved closer, it seemed as though > the other was coming to greet him. He could see clearly, > however, that he did not know this other, who was dressed > similarly except for something tied around his waist. > > When they were within hailing distance, he could see that what > the other had about his waist was a rope. It was wrapped around > him many times and probably, if extended, would reach a length > of 30 feet. > > The other began to uncurl the rope, and, just as they were > coming close, the stranger said, " Pardon me, would you be so > kind as to hold the end a moment? " > > Surprised by this politely phrased but curious request, he > agreed without a thought, reached out, and took it. > > " Thank you, " said the other, who then added, " two hands now, and > remember, hold tight. " Whereupon, the other jumped off the bridge. > > Quickly, the free-falling body hurtled the distance of the ropes > length, and from the bridge the man abruptly felt the pull. > Instinctively, he held tight and was almost dragged over the > side. He managed to brace himself against the edge, however, and > after having caught his breath, looked down at the other > dangling, close to oblivion. > > " What are you trying to do? " he yelled. > > " Just hold tight, " said the other. > > " This is ridiculous, " the man thought and began trying to haul > the other in. He could not get the leverage, however. It was as > though the weight of the other person and the length of the rope > had been carefully calculated in advance so that together they > created a counterweight just beyond his strength to bring the > other back to safety. > > " Why did you do this? " the man called out. > > " Remember, " said the other, " if you let go, I will be lost. " > > " But I cannot pull you up, " the man cried. > > " I am your responsibility, " said the other. > > " Well, I did not ask for it, " the man said. > > " If you let go, I am lost, " repeated the other. > > He began to look around for help. But there was no one. How > long would he have to wait? Why did this happen to befall him > now, just as he was on the verge of true success? He examined > the side, searching for a place to tie the rope. Some > protrusion, perhaps, or maybe a hole in the boards. But the > railing was unusually uniform in shape; there were no spaces > between the boards. There was no way to get rid of this newfound > burden, even temporarily. > > " What do you want? " he asked the other hanging below. > > " Just your help, " the other answered. > > " How can I help? I cannot pull you in, and there is no place to > tie the rope so that I can go and find someone to help me help you. " > > " I know that. Just hang on; that will be enough. Tie the rope > around your waist; it will be easier. " > > Fearing that his arms could not hold out much longer, he tied > the rope around his waist. > > " Why did you do this? " he asked again. " Don't you see what you > have done? What possible purpose could you have had in mind? " > > " Just remember, " said the other, " my life is in your hands. " > > What should he do? " If I let go, all my life I will know that I > let this other die. If I stay, I risk losing my momentum toward > my own long-sought-after salvation. Either way this will haunt > me forever. " > > With ironic humor he thought to die himself, instantly, to jump > off the bridge while still holding on. " That would teach this > fool. " But he wanted to live and to live life fully. " What a > choice I have to make; how shall I ever decide? " > > As time went by, still no one came. The critical moment of > decision was drawing near. To show his commitment to his own > goals, he would have to continue on his journey now. It was > already almost too late to arrive in time. But what a terrible > choice to have to make. > > A new thought occurred to him. While he could not pull this > other up solely by his own efforts, if the other would shorten > the rope from his end by curling it around his waist again and > again, together they could do it. Actually, the other could do > it by himself, so long as he, standing on the bridge, kept it > still and steady. > > " Now listen, " he shouted down. " I think I know how to save you. " > And he explained his plan. > > But the other wasn't interested. > > " You mean you won't help? But I told you I cannot pull you up by > myself, and I don't think I can hang on much longer either. " > > " You must try, " the other shouted back in tears. " If you fail, I > die. " > > The point of decision arrived. What should he do? " My life or > this other's? " And then a new idea. A revelation. So new, in > fact, it seemed heretical, so alien was it to his traditional > way of thinking. > > " I want you to listen to me carefully, " he said, " because I mean > what I am about to say. I will not accept the position of choice > for your life, only for my own; the position of choice for your > own life I hereby give back to you. " > > " What do you mean? " the other asked, afraid. > > " I mean, simply, it's up to you. You decide which way this ends. > I will become the counterweight. You do the pulling and bring > yourself up. I will even tug a little from here. " He began > unwinding the rope from around his waist and braced himself anew > against the side. > > " You cannot mean what you say, " the other shrieked. " You would > not be so selfish. I am your responsibility. What could be so > important that you would let someone die? Do not do this to me. " > > He waited a moment. There was no change in the tension of the rope. > > " I accept your choice, " he said, at last, and freed his hands. > > > --From " FRIEDMAN'S FABLES " by Edwin Friedman, > published by Guilford Press > > > I have often referred to this story when I started to doubt the > decisions I made for myself in regard to nada. > > Sylvia > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 16, 2006 Report Share Posted December 16, 2006 Sylvia, Thank you for posting this. I just sent it to my dad and sister. I hope they get some of the same comfort that I have received here many times. I am going to print this out and put it on my fridge so that I can see it more often. Adria __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.