Re: Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for Accomodation

[Guest guest]

:

I am so sorry you had that problem today at church. That is no fun,

especially when you are trying to make a contribution to others spiritual

development!!!

Someone told me a long time again and I always try to remember this as it

helps me " get past " anger at insensitivities. That is this: most people who

are rude or insensitive are simply overwhelmed and distracted -- not

necessarily mean or " bad " people. (I understand you were not categorizing them

as

such, I include that as people will naturally categorize people as being mean

or

" bad " .) Anyhow, when I look at them through this new light (as being

overwhelmed and distracted) and know they are struggling, just like me, it

casts

them in a different light.

This is something that has been effective for me and it generally sends a

blessing to the situation. It is, however, downright frustrating. This is

just a way to let it go and not focus on it.

Is there anything else you could have done? Is there someone you can talk

to let them know privately how difficult this can be for you?

Hope this is helpful! (And yes, it still sucks, darn it!) :-)

Love and Prayers,

Beth

[Guest guest]

:

I am so sorry you had that problem today at church. That is no fun,

especially when you are trying to make a contribution to others spiritual

development!!!

Someone told me a long time again and I always try to remember this as it

helps me " get past " anger at insensitivities. That is this: most people who

are rude or insensitive are simply overwhelmed and distracted -- not

necessarily mean or " bad " people. (I understand you were not categorizing them

as

such, I include that as people will naturally categorize people as being mean

or

" bad " .) Anyhow, when I look at them through this new light (as being

overwhelmed and distracted) and know they are struggling, just like me, it

casts

them in a different light.

This is something that has been effective for me and it generally sends a

blessing to the situation. It is, however, downright frustrating. This is

just a way to let it go and not focus on it.

Is there anything else you could have done? Is there someone you can talk

to let them know privately how difficult this can be for you?

Hope this is helpful! (And yes, it still sucks, darn it!) :-)

Love and Prayers,

Beth

[Guest guest]

Sorry, . That sounds like a very frustrating, and unsafe, situation.

I hope your letter helps.

I'll tell you where to go!

Mayo Clinic in Rochester

http://www.mayoclinic.org/rochester

s Hopkins Medicine

http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org

[ ] Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

Accomodation

>

> Just venting to people I know will understand. As I think I have mentioned

> I sometimes preach and often read (scripture)during mass at my parish. (I

> am Catholic). I also serve as a Eucharistic Minister. Today I was

> scheduled to preach and had spent a huge chunk of time preparing. I got

> there- and without any notice-I found that the church was set up early for

> lent. That means that the ambo( lectern- -place where the scripture is

> read and preaching is done) was moved out of the sanctuary and down on the

> floor to a built up platform - read- open stairs and no railing- and the

> lectern itself was so far forward on the platform- people like me with

> short arms- can't reach it to get there balance to get up. It has been set

> up similarly in past years- but never with the lectern so far forward. The

> remicade has helped my hands and shoulders but has done little for my feet

> and ankles - and when they flare- and they were flaring today- it really

> has an impact on my balance. If it weren't for the help of a friend of

> mine- who saw the paniced look on my face and placed herself in a way that

> I could balance on my way up and down- I could easily have fallen. It was

> embarassing. I don't need a cane for every day activities - and wouldn't

> need one for this- if they had worked a small railing or ramp into the

> design. Did I mention this was the Cathedral parish- and there is no

> excuse for the lack of sensitivity. Why do people think that if they have

> a small elevator for people with mobility problems so folks can attend

> services that they have done all they have to do..by failing to

> accomodate - they coopt people- otherwise perfectly capable of ministering

> from doing so ( the altar set up for communion minister is a similar open

> staired set up.) I spent most of the evening and forty five dollars on a

> cane with prongs so that I could get up and down tomorrow morning. The

> money will come out of my envelopes for the collection- it is my donation

> for the next two weeks or so. The liturgy commission, parish council, my

> pastor- and the new Bishop- if I have to contact him- will make changes

> around there. I have begun the letter - may run it by the group next week.

> The gospel- - is the similes of Salt and Light. They will get salt-

> and some light thrown on the subject. GRRRR . Thanks for listening.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Sorry, . That sounds like a very frustrating, and unsafe, situation.

I hope your letter helps.

I'll tell you where to go!

Mayo Clinic in Rochester

http://www.mayoclinic.org/rochester

s Hopkins Medicine

http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org

[ ] Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

Accomodation

>

> Just venting to people I know will understand. As I think I have mentioned

> I sometimes preach and often read (scripture)during mass at my parish. (I

> am Catholic). I also serve as a Eucharistic Minister. Today I was

> scheduled to preach and had spent a huge chunk of time preparing. I got

> there- and without any notice-I found that the church was set up early for

> lent. That means that the ambo( lectern- -place where the scripture is

> read and preaching is done) was moved out of the sanctuary and down on the

> floor to a built up platform - read- open stairs and no railing- and the

> lectern itself was so far forward on the platform- people like me with

> short arms- can't reach it to get there balance to get up. It has been set

> up similarly in past years- but never with the lectern so far forward. The

> remicade has helped my hands and shoulders but has done little for my feet

> and ankles - and when they flare- and they were flaring today- it really

> has an impact on my balance. If it weren't for the help of a friend of

> mine- who saw the paniced look on my face and placed herself in a way that

> I could balance on my way up and down- I could easily have fallen. It was

> embarassing. I don't need a cane for every day activities - and wouldn't

> need one for this- if they had worked a small railing or ramp into the

> design. Did I mention this was the Cathedral parish- and there is no

> excuse for the lack of sensitivity. Why do people think that if they have

> a small elevator for people with mobility problems so folks can attend

> services that they have done all they have to do..by failing to

> accomodate - they coopt people- otherwise perfectly capable of ministering

> from doing so ( the altar set up for communion minister is a similar open

> staired set up.) I spent most of the evening and forty five dollars on a

> cane with prongs so that I could get up and down tomorrow morning. The

> money will come out of my envelopes for the collection- it is my donation

> for the next two weeks or so. The liturgy commission, parish council, my

> pastor- and the new Bishop- if I have to contact him- will make changes

> around there. I have begun the letter - may run it by the group next week.

> The gospel- - is the similes of Salt and Light. They will get salt-

> and some light thrown on the subject. GRRRR . Thanks for listening.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks. Beth. Your approach is sound- but sometimes you have to vent to get

it out of your system. I have talked to someone privately- not only about me

but some others with similar issues. Hopefully they will take it seriously.

[ ] Re: Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

Accomodation

>

>

>:

>

>I am so sorry you had that problem today at church. That is no fun,

>especially when you are trying to make a contribution to others spiritual

>development!!!

>

>Someone told me a long time again and I always try to remember this as it

>helps me " get past " anger at insensitivities. That is this: most people

who

>are rude or insensitive are simply overwhelmed and distracted -- not

>necessarily mean or " bad " people. (I understand you were not categorizing

them as

>such, I include that as people will naturally categorize people as being

mean or

> " bad " .) Anyhow, when I look at them through this new light (as being

>overwhelmed and distracted) and know they are struggling, just like me, it

casts

>them in a different light.

>

>This is something that has been effective for me and it generally sends a

>blessing to the situation. It is, however, downright frustrating. This

is

>just a way to let it go and not focus on it.

>

>Is there anything else you could have done? Is there someone you can talk

>to let them know privately how difficult this can be for you?

>

>Hope this is helpful! (And yes, it still sucks, darn it!) :-)

>

>

>

>Love and Prayers,

>Beth

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks. Beth. Your approach is sound- but sometimes you have to vent to get

it out of your system. I have talked to someone privately- not only about me

but some others with similar issues. Hopefully they will take it seriously.

[ ] Re: Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

Accomodation

>

>

>:

>

>I am so sorry you had that problem today at church. That is no fun,

>especially when you are trying to make a contribution to others spiritual

>development!!!

>

>Someone told me a long time again and I always try to remember this as it

>helps me " get past " anger at insensitivities. That is this: most people

who

>are rude or insensitive are simply overwhelmed and distracted -- not

>necessarily mean or " bad " people. (I understand you were not categorizing

them as

>such, I include that as people will naturally categorize people as being

mean or

> " bad " .) Anyhow, when I look at them through this new light (as being

>overwhelmed and distracted) and know they are struggling, just like me, it

casts

>them in a different light.

>

>This is something that has been effective for me and it generally sends a

>blessing to the situation. It is, however, downright frustrating. This

is

>just a way to let it go and not focus on it.

>

>Is there anything else you could have done? Is there someone you can talk

>to let them know privately how difficult this can be for you?

>

>Hope this is helpful! (And yes, it still sucks, darn it!) :-)

>

>

>

>Love and Prayers,

>Beth

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks . Hopefully they will deal with it.

Re: [ ] Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

Accomodation

>

>Sorry, . That sounds like a very frustrating, and unsafe, situation.

>

>I hope your letter helps.

>

>

>

>

>I'll tell you where to go!

>

>Mayo Clinic in Rochester

>http://www.mayoclinic.org/rochester

>

>s Hopkins Medicine

>http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org

>

>

> [ ] Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

>Accomodation

>

>

>>

>> Just venting to people I know will understand. As I think I have

mentioned

>> I sometimes preach and often read (scripture)during mass at my parish. (I

>> am Catholic). I also serve as a Eucharistic Minister. Today I was

>> scheduled to preach and had spent a huge chunk of time preparing. I got

>> there- and without any notice-I found that the church was set up early

for

>> lent. That means that the ambo( lectern- -place where the scripture is

>> read and preaching is done) was moved out of the sanctuary and down on

the

>> floor to a built up platform - read- open stairs and no railing- and the

>> lectern itself was so far forward on the platform- people like me with

>> short arms- can't reach it to get there balance to get up. It has been

set

>> up similarly in past years- but never with the lectern so far forward.

The

>> remicade has helped my hands and shoulders but has done little for my

feet

>> and ankles - and when they flare- and they were flaring today- it really

>> has an impact on my balance. If it weren't for the help of a friend of

>> mine- who saw the paniced look on my face and placed herself in a way

that

>> I could balance on my way up and down- I could easily have fallen. It was

>> embarassing. I don't need a cane for every day activities - and wouldn't

>> need one for this- if they had worked a small railing or ramp into the

>> design. Did I mention this was the Cathedral parish- and there is no

>> excuse for the lack of sensitivity. Why do people think that if they have

>> a small elevator for people with mobility problems so folks can attend

>> services that they have done all they have to do..by failing to

>> accomodate - they coopt people- otherwise perfectly capable of

ministering

>> from doing so ( the altar set up for communion minister is a similar open

>> staired set up.) I spent most of the evening and forty five dollars on a

>> cane with prongs so that I could get up and down tomorrow morning. The

>> money will come out of my envelopes for the collection- it is my donation

>> for the next two weeks or so. The liturgy commission, parish council, my

>> pastor- and the new Bishop- if I have to contact him- will make changes

>> around there. I have begun the letter - may run it by the group next

week.

>> The gospel- - is the similes of Salt and Light. They will get

salt-

>> and some light thrown on the subject. GRRRR . Thanks for listening.

>>

>>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks . Hopefully they will deal with it.

Re: [ ] Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

Accomodation

>

>Sorry, . That sounds like a very frustrating, and unsafe, situation.

>

>I hope your letter helps.

>

>

>

>

>I'll tell you where to go!

>

>Mayo Clinic in Rochester

>http://www.mayoclinic.org/rochester

>

>s Hopkins Medicine

>http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org

>

>

> [ ] Just Venting- Lack of Sensitivity to Need for

>Accomodation

>

>

>>

>> Just venting to people I know will understand. As I think I have

mentioned

>> I sometimes preach and often read (scripture)during mass at my parish. (I

>> am Catholic). I also serve as a Eucharistic Minister. Today I was

>> scheduled to preach and had spent a huge chunk of time preparing. I got

>> there- and without any notice-I found that the church was set up early

for

>> lent. That means that the ambo( lectern- -place where the scripture is

>> read and preaching is done) was moved out of the sanctuary and down on

the

>> floor to a built up platform - read- open stairs and no railing- and the

>> lectern itself was so far forward on the platform- people like me with

>> short arms- can't reach it to get there balance to get up. It has been

set

>> up similarly in past years- but never with the lectern so far forward.

The

>> remicade has helped my hands and shoulders but has done little for my

feet

>> and ankles - and when they flare- and they were flaring today- it really

>> has an impact on my balance. If it weren't for the help of a friend of

>> mine- who saw the paniced look on my face and placed herself in a way

that

>> I could balance on my way up and down- I could easily have fallen. It was

>> embarassing. I don't need a cane for every day activities - and wouldn't

>> need one for this- if they had worked a small railing or ramp into the

>> design. Did I mention this was the Cathedral parish- and there is no

>> excuse for the lack of sensitivity. Why do people think that if they have

>> a small elevator for people with mobility problems so folks can attend

>> services that they have done all they have to do..by failing to

>> accomodate - they coopt people- otherwise perfectly capable of

ministering

>> from doing so ( the altar set up for communion minister is a similar open

>> staired set up.) I spent most of the evening and forty five dollars on a

>> cane with prongs so that I could get up and down tomorrow morning. The

>> money will come out of my envelopes for the collection- it is my donation

>> for the next two weeks or so. The liturgy commission, parish council, my

>> pastor- and the new Bishop- if I have to contact him- will make changes

>> around there. I have begun the letter - may run it by the group next

week.

>> The gospel- - is the similes of Salt and Light. They will get

salt-

>> and some light thrown on the subject. GRRRR . Thanks for listening.

>>

>>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/7/2005 1:29:44 A.M. Eastern Standard Time, writes:

Thanks. Beth. Your approach is sound- but sometimes you have to vent to get

it out of your system. I have talked to someone privately- not only about me

but some others with similar issues. Hopefully they will take it seriously.

~~~~~~~~

You are so right, ... venting is extremely helpful (take it from an

old venter!) :-) I am glad you were able to share with them and am still

sorry you had the experience.

Love and Prayers,

Beth

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 2/7/2005 1:29:44 A.M. Eastern Standard Time, writes:

Thanks. Beth. Your approach is sound- but sometimes you have to vent to get

it out of your system. I have talked to someone privately- not only about me

but some others with similar issues. Hopefully they will take it seriously.

~~~~~~~~

You are so right, ... venting is extremely helpful (take it from an

old venter!) :-) I am glad you were able to share with them and am still

sorry you had the experience.

Love and Prayers,

Beth

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*