Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Peggy,Have you heard that family saying, "Every family tree has a few nuts! " The "nuts" make us stronger. Hang in there special lady! I'll be praying for you!Cyndi (Dad pf 12/05)Peggy wrote: Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I need prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 my dear friend peggy... you know we will be praying for you,, its' hard to not have family around,, trust me,, we are here in texas.. my family is in oregon,, his family in p.a.. not that they would do a darn thing anyway... both his dads..(i'll explain one day hehee) live on the east coast,, he has 9 brothers and sisters........and do you think one of them could call him to say .. hey.. i am sorry your going thru this.. we love you?? heck nooooooooo... then here at home,, all we have is our two children.. carla 22. and matt 20... carla gets to sad to see her dad sick. and matt is a typical 20 year old.. could care less about anyone but himself.. oh they love their dad.. but matt and jon butt heads all the time.. matt keeps everything in... so even when they are here.. they arent spending time with thier dad. it makes me mad.. i want to shake them say HEY>>> he wont be here foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrr .. but i dont.. cuase i dont want to think that way..... anyway enough of my issues..lol know that we love you and will be here for you always.......muahhhhhhhh (((((((((hugs))))))))) mawou........(may angels watch over you) teri Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Peggy, Yes, I do know! This is why I appreciate those people who come on our site who are so concerned about thier parents and such good caretakers. I hate being needy....and I certainly don't want to be pityful....but time is so precious to me and it is discouraging when the days are spent alone. You are not nuts! You are strong and extremely loving towards your family. >> Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I need> prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know> how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.> It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with> you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so> much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my> strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.> Much Love and Prayers, Peggy> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Peggy, Uh oh, space monkeys ate part of my post again. Why is that?? I think it is Satan! Anyway, I will keep you in my heart and in my prayers. You are on my 'Most Admired List'. Hugs, Joyce PF 1997 > >> > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I> need> > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind.> You know> > how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me> Nuts.> > It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on> with> > you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my> grands so> > much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my> > strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.> > Much Love and Prayers, Peggy> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Peggy, I think we all know about family members who don't behave the way we expect or want...I've got a couple in my family and it can be so hurtful and disappointing. I'll pray that your peace of mind and strength and joy is restored as I know it will be! Consider yourself hugged dear lady!! Love, Beth IPF 06/06Draw close. Hold hands. Life is short. God is good. Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I needprayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You knowhow families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on withyou. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands somuch..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew mystrength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Peggy, At what age did you start carrying the rock? Started with me when I was in early 40'S Been carrying it a long time. Put the rock in a corner and enjoy your days and give thanks for every day you wake up. Thinking about you and wishing you blessings. Grey----That was a good expression (the rock) Life deals us a lot of joys and sad stuff and I recone that must be god's plan. Sorry you are sad today. Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I needprayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You knowhow families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on withyou. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands somuch..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew mystrength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Dear Peggy, You have such a good heart--reminds me of my Mom. One thing about kind hearts though, they can be easily hurt. I'm so sorry to hear about your disappointment this weekend. I know how much you must have been looking forward to seeing your grandchildren. I hope they visit soon. Until then, please know that you are in my prayers daily. Love to you, anne (dad ipf 03/06) Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I needprayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You knowhow families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on withyou. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands somuch..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew mystrength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Peggy - I, too am so sorry that you are hurting. I don't think our families mean to do this....I just think that people don't understand how little things can mean so much to us. And we probably didn't realise it either, when we were healthy. I had a conversation with my husband today....and it makes me realise that he really doesn't understand what is going on.....now don't get me wrong...he is a wonderful husband....we have a great relationship....but he made a comment about how I should be doing more physically...and then I would feel better.....I think he believes that it's like if you are out of shape and you get winded...then you work out and are in better shape....then you aren't winded.....I almost felt like he hit me with a sledge hammer......I know that he doesn't understand why I can't breathe....we've talked about this for the past 2 years....but then, afterwards I wondered if he is in denial. I think that if he really thought about what was going on, it would hurt too much. I know he doesn't say this just to hurt me, but it does. I know that he feels so helpless because he can't do anything. So, Peggy hang in there....our families love us very much....I have to go because I'm ma king myself cry..... --Diane Quinlan dianequinlan@... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 > > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week- end. I need > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know > how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. > It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with > you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so > much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my > strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. > Much Love and Prayers, Peggy > Dear Peggy, I am fairly new to this site and I so appreciate the way all of you that have been here a while support and uplift each other. I know how you feel when it comes to your child. I live in MS and one of my daughters live in KY. Her son goes to school year round just about it up there and when he has a two week break she goes to visit my sister in AL and she always wants me to come over there for a few days. My sister is half between the two of us so it is a six hour drive for her and about 7 for me. She says she just can't come here because it would take to much money and she would have to stay at a motel since my sister would be coming with her. My daughter does not like her stepfather, my husband. She forgets that he is the one that is with me 24/7 and he is the one that is there when the going gets rough. She has never been here when I have a bad day and fight for every breath I take or when I am really down and all I want to do is cry. She only wants to see her mom when she thinks mom is feeling good and having a good day. My daughter in WI just refuses to come home period, she has to much on her plate she says with her 16 year old daughter and all the dance classes she has to go to with her. I just thank God that my oldest daughter takes time out of her busy day to call me 2 or 3 times a day just to say hello and see if I am ok. When my son is home he does the same and his wife is in contact with me every day and I am greatful for a daughter-in-law that cares. So my friend we all have nuts in the house and some are a lot more nuts than others. I would love to be able to see my grandchildren that live in KY and WI but I am just not able to make those long trips by myself any more and they aren't willing to come here to see me. My daughter in WI has an ex-husband that lives close by and if she came home she would be expected to go see her ex in-laws and that is the real reason she doesn't come home, she just want admit it. You hang in there and let God deal with the kids and everything will work out just as He plans for it to. I get up everyday and give the day to Him and then I try real hard not to pick it up again. Somedays I can do that and others I fight the battle not to pick it up all day. I will be praying for you and your daughter. You are blessed far beyond anything you could imagine because God has put a lot of really good people around you to pray with you and for you. May God Bless you and keep you each and every day. Barbara R IPF 1/2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Hi Peggy,I was talking about you at dinner tonight and my 41/2 son was asking a lot of questions...anyways to make a long story short....we just finished prayers before bedtime and he said, "God, can you please pray for mommys computer friend Peggy..she needs a big hug!" It touched my heart.Peggy everyone is praying for you. You are such a dear lady...a very special one.Hang in there.Cyndi (DAD, PF 12/05)acapulco_cottonwoodcove wrote: > > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week- end. I need > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know > how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. > It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with > you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so > much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my > strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. > Much Love and Prayers, Peggy > Dear Peggy, I am fairly new to this site and I so appreciate the way all of you that have been here a while support and uplift each other. I know how you feel when it comes to your child. I live in MS and one of my daughters live in KY. Her son goes to school year round just about it up there and when he has a two week break she goes to visit my sister in AL and she always wants me to come over there for a few days. My sister is half between the two of us so it is a six hour drive for her and about 7 for me. She says she just can't come here because it would take to much money and she would have to stay at a motel since my sister would be coming with her. My daughter does not like her stepfather, my husband. She forgets that he is the one that is with me 24/7 and he is the one that is there when the going gets rough. She has never been here when I have a bad day and fight for every breath I take or when I am really down and all I want to do is cry. She only wants to see her mom when she thinks mom is feeling good and having a good day. My daughter in WI just refuses to come home period, she has to much on her plate she says with her 16 year old daughter and all the dance classes she has to go to with her. I just thank God that my oldest daughter takes time out of her busy day to call me 2 or 3 times a day just to say hello and see if I am ok. When my son is home he does the same and his wife is in contact with me every day and I am greatful for a daughter-in-law that cares. So my friend we all have nuts in the house and some are a lot more nuts than others. I would love to be able to see my grandchildren that live in KY and WI but I am just not able to make those long trips by myself any more and they aren't willing to come here to see me. My daughter in WI has an ex-husband that lives close by and if she came home she would be expected to go see her ex in-laws and that is the real reason she doesn't come home, she just want admit it. You hang in there and let God deal with the kids and everything will work out just as He plans for it to. I get up everyday and give the day to Him and then I try real hard not to pick it up again. Somedays I can do that and others I fight the battle not to pick it up all day. I will be praying for you and your daughter. You are blessed far beyond anything you could imagine because God has put a lot of really good people around you to pray with you and for you. May God Bless you and keep you each and every day. Barbara R IPF 1/2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 My dear Peggy, Diane q. and all the rest of you; I know how heart breaking it can be when our loved ones seem to be cold and uncaring but we must realize that they can't always be strong for us. There are two perspectives with this disease, those of us that have it and those that don't. For those of us that have the disease there may be a period of denial but as we feel the disease progressing within us and notice the limitations it puts on us we get passed the denial stage. Our families and friends don't feel what we feel, they only see their loved ones suffering. Most times they are able to deal with seeing our pain for our benefit. Other times they are unable to deal with us because of their own grief and suffering that the disease causes them. We may,sometimes, become too needy for the comfort and closeness of our loved ones without realizing the affect it may be having on them. We need to step back and allow them to cope with the situation at hand. We have to understand that they do love us and want to help us but they may feel frustrated because of their inability to alleviate our situation. Perhaps the grandkids ask alot of questions that mom or dad can't answer causing frustration and pain. We can't be selfish all the time. They're not nuts, we're not nuts, we are all trying to cope with this situation. Sometimes we and they just can't. We have to be understanding and loving to them as well. I'm just an arm chair shrink whose wife has been mad at him since his diagnosis and I understand. May God bless us, give us understanding and especially to allow us to forgive those we feel have slighted us. Gordon ipf/uip 12/03 Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I needprayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You knowhow families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on withyou. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands somuch..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew mystrength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 17, 2006 Report Share Posted September 17, 2006 Dear Peggy: I know how you feel. Children can be a joy but they also can break your heart so badly that it never mends right. I have 5 children, all grown and married. Only one son () lives near me, the rest live in another state. About three months ago, our sewer pipe broke and we were without water and a toilet for over a week. Both my husband and I are disabled and were unable to fix it, so I asked my son to please help us to use a ditch digger to dig a hole (at our cost). He refused as he was busy planning a cruise with his wife, even though it was a month away. Well, I told my other kids I was disappointed in that he wouldnt help us when we were in such desperate need. My other kids came 600 miles one way to help us with the sewer and when they got here they chewed out for not helping us. He made up a lie about me allowing him to be abused when he was younger and that is why he never comes around me. He has always had a problem with lying but unfortunately he is also very convincing and my other kids chose to believe him. Since then I have not heard from any of them and I am heartbroken that they could believe such a horrible thing about me and especially from their brother who they knows lies all the time. I have never lied to my children and they know that too. My kids knew I was facing some medical tests that may show a serious condition and saw I was on oxygen while they were here, but they have not bothered to call me and find out how I am since they left. Since then I found out I have ILD and have not called any of them to tell them. My husband (not their father) feels they have abandoned me because they saw my deterioration and dont want to have to take care of me. I am afraid he may be correct because they made it clear to me on that visit that none of them had room for me in their homes, if I needed help, and before 's lie, they were begging me to move in with them..(their words not mine). I have 8 grandchildren and now dont see them or hear from them either. I am so heartbroken but I will not call them to tell them I have a terminal illness because I dont want to hear false words of concern or sound like I am asking for pity. As long as they want to believe I would ever allow any of them to be abused and not do anything about it, then we have nothing between us. So I feel for you Peggy, only our kids can hurt us so deeply and in a way no one else can. My heart too, is breaking. Hugs, Carolyn -- Re: Prayer needed Dear Peggy, You have such a good heart--reminds me of my Mom. One thing about kind hearts though, they can be easily hurt. I'm so sorry to hear about your disappointment this weekend. I know how much you must have been looking forward to seeing your grandchildren. I hope they visit soon. Until then, please know that you are in my prayers daily. Love to you, anne (dad ipf 03/06) Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I needprayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You knowhow families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on withyou. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands somuch..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew mystrength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Everything that goes around, comes around. When you plant radishes, you get radishes, ...when you plant corn, you get corn. If you plant neglect, resentment, uncaring, and lack of compassion, that's exactly what you will harvest. That is a spiritual law...you reap what you sow....good OR bad. But by the Grace of God, there goeth I. Thank You Lord for reminding us all... kiss kiss, Ginger 9/04 ipf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Diane, Ooooh, sounds so familiar. I am way more patient than I used to be. I was diagnosed with Lupus when I was 33. My husband was young, athletic, very healthy and just didn't get it. I spent most of the years after diagnosis feeling very alone. People with Chronic Invisible Illness get no sympathy or understanding. People in my age group didn't want to talk about my pain and fatigue. My family stuck thier head in the sand. Since I have been diagnosed with PF my husband has been more understanding. He has been there for doc visits and listenened to the same prognosis that I have. He still will say insane things like your hubby said. He is likewise a good guy and we have been in love for 45 years. I have thought that he needs to put this illness somewhere he doesn't have to think about it so that the grief does not kill him. This is one of the reasons I am here in this group. For the past few months, I have felt so relieved that there are people who actually KNOW what I am going through, who actually feel the same panic at loss of breath, who grieve in the night for loss of health, who have to struggle just to stay sane. Thank you all, Hugs, Joyce PF 1997 >> Peggy - I, too am so sorry that you are hurting. I don't think our families mean to do this....I just think that people don't understand how little things can mean so much to us. And we probably didn't realise it either, when we were healthy. > I had a conversation with my husband today....and it makes me realise that he really doesn't understand what is going on.....now don't get me wrong...he is a wonderful husband....we have a great relationship....but he made a comment about how I should be doing more physically...and then I would feel better.....I think he believes that it's like if you are out of shape and you get winded...then you work out and are in better shape....then you aren't winded.....I almost felt like he hit me with a sledge hammer......I know that he doesn't understand why I can't breathe....we've talked about this for the past 2 years....but then, afterwards I wondered if he is in denial. I think that if he really thought about what was going on, it would hurt too much. I know he doesn't say this just to hurt me, but it does. I know that he feels so helpless because he can't do anything. So, Peggy hang in there....our families love us very much....I have to go because I'm making myself cry.....> > --> Diane Quinlan > dianequinlan@...> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Barbara, What are these daughters teaching thier own children about loving and caring for thier parents. One day they themselves will also be in need of love and caring from thier children and those children will have no example of compassion from which to draw. Everything that goes around, comes around. I loved the writing that Sher put up yesturday titled LET GO. I copied it and it right here next to my computer. I am going to read it every day and stop expecting anything so that I will stop being dissapointed and start dreaming of being the best ME that I can be. I can not do one thing to change another person whether it is my child or not. Hang in there and praise God for every day! Hugs, Joyce PF 1997> >> > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-> end. I need> > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. > You know> > how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me > Nuts.> > It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going > on with> > you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my > grands so> > much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to > renew my> > strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.> > Much Love and Prayers, Peggy> >> Dear Peggy, I am fairly new to this site and I so appreciate the way > all of you that have been here a while support and uplift each other. > I know how you feel when it comes to your child. I live in MS and one > of my daughters live in KY. Her son goes to school year round just > about it up there and when he has a two week break she goes to visit > my sister in AL and she always wants me to come over there for a few > days. My sister is half between the two of us so it is a six hour > drive for her and about 7 for me. She says she just can't come here > because it would take to much money and she would have to stay at a > motel since my sister would be coming with her. My daughter does not > like her stepfather, my husband. She forgets that he is the one that > is with me 24/7 and he is the one that is there when the going gets > rough. She has never been here when I have a bad day and fight for > every breath I take or when I am really down and all I want to do is > cry. She only wants to see her mom when she thinks mom is feeling > good and having a good day. My daughter in WI just refuses to come > home period, she has to much on her plate she says with her 16 year > old daughter and all the dance classes she has to go to with her. I > just thank God that my oldest daughter takes time out of her busy day > to call me 2 or 3 times a day just to say hello and see if I am ok. > When my son is home he does the same and his wife is in contact with > me every day and I am greatful for a daughter-in-law that cares. So > my friend we all have nuts in the house and some are a lot more nuts > than others. I would love to be able to see my grandchildren that > live in KY and WI but I am just not able to make those long trips by > myself any more and they aren't willing to come here to see me. My > daughter in WI has an ex-husband that lives close by and if she came > home she would be expected to go see her ex in-laws and that is the > real reason she doesn't come home, she just want admit it. You hang > in there and let God deal with the kids and everything will work out > just as He plans for it to. I get up everyday and give the day to Him > and then I try real hard not to pick it up again. Somedays I can do > that and others I fight the battle not to pick it up all day. I will > be praying for you and your daughter. You are blessed far beyond > anything you could imagine because God has put a lot of really good > people around you to pray with you and for you.> > > May God Bless you and keep you each and every day.> Barbara R IPF 1/2003> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Gordon, How wise you are! Joyce >> My dear Peggy, Diane q. and all the rest of you;> I know how heart breaking it can be when our loved ones seem to be cold and uncaring but we must realize that they can't always be strong for us. There are two perspectives with this disease, those of us that have it and those that don't. For those of us that have the disease there may be a period of denial but as we feel the disease progressing within us and notice the limitations it puts on us we get passed the denial stage. Our families and friends don't feel what we feel, they only see their loved ones suffering. Most times they are able to deal with seeing our pain for our benefit. Other times they are unable to deal with us because of their own grief and suffering that the disease causes them. We may,sometimes, become too needy for the comfort and closeness of our loved ones without realizing the affect it may be having on them. We need to step back and allow them to cope with the situation at hand. We have to understand that they do love us and want to help us but they may feel frustrated because of their inability to alleviate our situation. Perhaps the grandkids ask alot of questions that mom or dad can't answer causing frustration and pain. We can't be selfish all the time. They're not nuts, we're not nuts, we are all trying to cope with this situation. Sometimes we and they just can't. We have to be understanding and loving to them as well. I'm just an arm chair shrink whose wife has been mad at him since his diagnosis and I understand. May God bless us, give us understanding and especially to allow us to forgive those we feel have slighted us.> Gordon ipf/uip 12/03> Prayer needed> > > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I need> prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know> how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.> It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with> you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so> much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my> strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.> Much Love and Prayers, Peggy> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Carolyn, Thank you so very much for being so open and sharing your great heartache with us. That took courage and confidence in our really caring. I care. I care that you are dealing with this monster and doing it virtually alone. I care that the same children that your nursed and nurtured are so uncaring. I care that you suffer. Please know that God knows your heart and he knows the truth. ny Carson said once that he wished birth control was retroactive. HA! HA! I thought of that many times while going through the horrid teenage years. Take care and praise God for every day. Hugs, Joyce PF 1997>> Dear Peggy: > I know how you feel. Children can be a joy but they also can break your> heart so badly that it never mends right. I have 5 children, all grown and> married. Only one son () lives near me, the rest live in another state> About three months ago, our sewer pipe broke and we were without water and> a toilet for over a week. Both my husband and I are disabled and were> unable to fix it, so I asked my son to please help us to use a ditch digger> to dig a hole (at our cost). He refused as he was busy planning a cruise> with his wife, even though it was a month away. Well, I told my other kids> I was disappointed in that he wouldnt help us when we were in such desperate> need. My other kids came 600 miles one way to help us with the sewer and> when they got here they chewed out for not helping us. He made up a> lie about me allowing him to be abused when he was younger and that is why> he never comes around me. He has always had a problem with lying but> unfortunately he is also very convincing and my other kids chose to believe> him. Since then I have not heard from any of them and I am heartbroken that> they could believe such a horrible thing about me and especially from their> brother who they knows lies all the time. I have never lied to my children> and they know that too. My kids knew I was facing some medical tests that> may show a serious condition and saw I was on oxygen while they were here,> but they have not bothered to call me and find out how I am since they left.> Since then I found out I have ILD and have not called any of them to tell> them. My husband (not their father) feels they have abandoned me because> they saw my deterioration and dont want to have to take care of me. I am> afraid he may be correct because they made it clear to me on that visit that> none of them had room for me in their homes, if I needed help, and before> 's lie, they were begging me to move in with them..(their words not> mine). I have 8 grandchildren and now dont see them or hear from them> either. I am so heartbroken but I will not call them to tell them I have a> terminal illness because I dont want to hear false words of concern or sound> like I am asking for pity. As long as they want to believe I would ever> allow any of them to be abused and not do anything about it, then we have> nothing between us. So I feel for you Peggy, only our kids can hurt us so> deeply and in a way no one else can. My heart too, is breaking. > Hugs, > Carolyn > > -- Re: Prayer needed > > Dear Peggy, > You have such a good heart--reminds me of my Mom. One thing about kind> hearts though, they can be easily hurt. I'm so sorry to hear about your> disappointment this weekend. I know how much you must have been looking> forward to seeing your grandchildren. I hope they visit soon. Until then,> please know that you are in my prayers daily. > Love to you, > anne (dad ipf 03/06) > Prayer needed > > > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I need > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know > how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. > It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with > you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so > much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my > strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. > Much Love and Prayers, Peggy> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Hi everyone, Lots of talk of kids today, some not so good stuff. My Mom and Dad feel like they are a burden to my brother and especially to me. I keep telling them that I'm glad for what I can do to help them. It's true, when I can't do anything, the uselessness really gets to me. My brother is less involved, men usually are, and sometimes I wish that the responsibility was shared a little more evenly. It's true though, that some people just can't handle the medical "stuff", he usually helps out with "mechanical" stuff around their home. I am on maternity leave from work right now with my 5 1/2 month old daughter so while I am free from work constraints, I have different issues with respect to child care (I'm also still nursing so can't leave her for too long). I guess I feel like my parents have done so much for us, that I'm willing to do whatever I can to help out. Plus, I have done some things that i'm certain put my parents through hell! (oh my, those teenage years!) I will say this, and it kind of echoes Ginger's message about "you reap what you sow", I know that I will be at peace when my parents are gone, knowing that I did what was right and what I could to help in their time of need. Prayers to all of you that may be struggling with difficult family situations right now. I'm hoping that your children will reach out to you soon and that God will bring you closer together. Love to you, anne (dad ipf 03/06) Re: Re: Prayer needed In a message dated 9/18/2006 7:47:11 A.M. Central Daylight Time, joycedalton29aol writes: Everything that goes around, comes around. When you plant radishes, you get radishes, ...when you plant corn, you get corn. If you plant neglect, resentment, uncaring, and lack of compassion, that's exactly what you will harvest. That is a spiritual law...you reap what you sow....good OR bad. But by the Grace of God, there goeth I. Thank You Lord for reminding us all... kiss kiss, Ginger 9/04 ipf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Dearest Carolyn, How tragic your children don't know what your going through. I do think I would tell them, if you can't talk to them, e-mail or write a letter. But I think if nothing else you would feel better knowing you have reached out and unburdened yourself. I will be praying for you. God Bless You. Take GOOD care of YOU. Love and Prayers, Peggy 9/04 ipf Dear Peggy: I know how you feel. Children can be a joy but they also can break your heart so badly that it never mends right. I have 5 children, all grown and married. Only one son () lives near me, the rest live in another state. About three months ago, our sewer pipe broke and we were without water and a toilet for over a week. Both my husband and I are disabled and were unable to fix it, so I asked my son to please help us to use a ditch digger to dig a hole (at our cost). He refused as he was busy planning a cruise with his wife, even though it was a month away. Well, I told my other kids I was disappointed in that he wouldnt help us when we were in such desperate need. My other kids came 600 miles one way to help us with the sewer and when they got here they chewed out for not helping us. He made up a lie about me allowing him to be abused when he was younger and that is why he neve! r comes around me. He has always had a problem with lying but unfortunately he is also very convincing and my other kids chose to believe him. Since then I have not heard from any of them and I am heartbroken that they could believe such a horrible thing about me and especially from their brother who they knows lies all the time. I have never lied to my children and they know that too. My kids knew I was facing some medical tests that may show a serious condition and saw I was on oxygen while they were here, but they have not bothered to call me and find out how I am since they left. Since then I found out I have ILD and have not called any of them to tell them. My husband (not their father) feels they have abandoned me because they saw my deterioration and dont want to have to take care of me. I am afraid he may be correct because they made it clear to me on that visit that none of them had room for me in their homes, if I nee! ded help, and before 's lie, they were begging me to move in with them..(their words not mine). I have 8 grandchildren and now dont see them or hear from them either. I am so heartbroken but I will not call them to tell them I have a terminal illness because I dont want to hear false words of concern or sound like I am asking for pity. As long as they want to believe I would ever allow any of them to be abused and not do anything about it, then we have nothing between us. So I feel for you Peggy, only our kids can hurt us so deeply and in a way no one else can. My heart too, is breaking. Hugs, Carolyn -- Re: Prayer needed Dear Peggy, You have such a good heart--reminds me of my Mom. One thing about kind hearts though, they can be easily hurt. I'm so sorry to hear about your disappointment this weekend. I know how much you must have been looking forward to seeing your grandchildren. I hope they visit soon. Until then, please know that you are in my prayers daily. Love to you, anne (dad ipf 03/06) Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I need prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Thank You Gordon, Under that bright bra is one special, smart guy. God Bless Love and Prayers, Peggy 9/04 ipf My dear Peggy, Diane q. and all the rest of you; I know how heart breaking it can be when our loved ones seem to be cold and uncaring but we must realize that they can't always be strong for us. There are two perspectives with this disease, those of us that have it and those that don't. For those of us that have the disease there may be a period of denial but as we feel the disease progressing within us and notice the limitations it puts on us we get passed the denial stage. Our families and friends don't feel what we feel, they only see their loved ones suffering. Most times they are able to deal with seeing our pain for our benefit. Other times they are unable to deal with us because of their own grief and suffering that the disease causes them. We may,sometimes, become too needy for the comfort and closeness of our loved ones without realizing the affect it may be having on them. We need to step back and allow them to cope with the situation at hand. We have to understand that they do love us and want to help us but they may feel frustrated because of their inability to alleviate our situation. Perhaps the grandkids ask alot of questions that mom or dad can't answer causing frustration and pain. We can't be selfish all the time. They're not nuts, we're not nuts, we are all trying to cope with this situation. Sometimes we and they just can't. We have to be understanding and loving to them as well. I'm just an arm chair shrink whose wife has been mad at him since his diagnosis and I understand. May God bless us, give us understanding and especially to allow us to forgive those we feel have slighted us. Gordon ipf/uip 12/03 Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I need prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Thanks Grey, My Pastor did a sermon on forgiveness " DROP THAT ROCK " it was wonderful. Hello to Molly from Abby and Patty.. " smiles " Love and Prayers, Peggy 9/04 ipf Peggy, At what age did you start carrying the rock? Started with me when I was in early 40'S Been carrying it a long time. Put the rock in a corner and enjoy your days and give thanks for every day you wake up. Thinking about you and wishing you blessings. Grey----That was a good expression (the rock) Life deals us a lot of joys and sad stuff and I recone that must be god's plan. Sorry you are sad today. Prayer needed Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I need prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You know how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on with you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands so much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Carolyn, I will be praying for you on Friday. I pray for your strength and for the strength of your husband to endure with you. I pray for the hands of the surgeons to be steady and thier minds sharp and alert. I pray that the results of the biopsy will reveal a cause that can be treated or that it is indeed a more treatable disease altogether. I had home health care nurses after I came home from the hospital. Please let the social department at the hospital know that you are coming home without family help and that your husband is disabled. Our church was so good to us. They brought meals for a month. Some stayed with me when my husband was gone. My girls were good during that time, too. I think they are just tired of Mom being sick. Well, I am tired of it too. I hope all goes well and you have quick recovery. Mine was longer because they scraped a portion of my lung. The recovery was long and painful. You should do well. I pray so. Let us know as soon as you are able. Hugs and prayers, Joyce PF 1997 > > > > Dear Peggy: > > I know how you feel. Children can be a joy but they also can break your > > heart so badly that it never mends right. I have 5 children, all grown and > > married. Only one son () lives near me, the rest live in another> state > > About three months ago, our sewer pipe broke and we were without water and > > a toilet for over a week. Both my husband and I are disabled and were > > unable to fix it, so I asked my son to please help us to use a ditch> digger > > to dig a hole (at our cost). He refused as he was busy planning a cruise > > with his wife, even though it was a month away. Well, I told my other kids > > I was disappointed in that he wouldnt help us when we were in such> desperate > > need. My other kids came 600 miles one way to help us with the sewer and > > when they got here they chewed out for not helping us. He made up a > > lie about me allowing him to be abused when he was younger and that is why > > he never comes around me. He has always had a problem with lying but > > unfortunately he is also very convincing and my other kids chose to> believe > > him. Since then I have not heard from any of them and I am heartbroken> that > > they could believe such a horrible thing about me and especially from> their > > brother who they knows lies all the time. I have never lied to my children > > and they know that too. My kids knew I was facing some medical tests that > > may show a serious condition and saw I was on oxygen while they were here, > > but they have not bothered to call me and find out how I am since they> left. > > Since then I found out I have ILD and have not called any of them to tell > > them. My husband (not their father) feels they have abandoned me because > > they saw my deterioratio! n and do nt want to have to take care of me. I> am > > afraid he may be correct because they made it clear to me on that visit> that > > none of them had room for me in their homes, if I needed help, and before > > 's lie, they were begging me to move in with them..(their words not > > mine). I have 8 grandchildren and now dont see them or hear from them > > either. I am so heartbroken but I will not call them to tell them I have a > > terminal illness because I dont want to hear false words of concern or> sound > > like I am asking for pity. As long as they want to believe I would ever > > allow any of them to be abused and not do anything about it, then we have > > nothing between us. So I feel for you Peggy, only our kids can hurt us so > > deeply and in a way no one else can. My heart too, is breaking. > > Hugs, > > Carolyn > > > > -- Re: Prayer needed > > > > Dear Peggy, > > You have such a good heart--reminds me of my Mom. One thing about kind > > hearts though, they can be easily hurt. I'm so sorry to hear about your > > disappointment this weekend. I know how much you must have been looking > > forward to seeing your grandchildren. I hope they visit soon. Until then, > > please know that you are in my prayers daily. > > Love to you, > > anne (dad ipf 03/06) > > Prayer needed > > > > > > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I> need > > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You> know > > how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. > >! It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on> with > > you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands> so > > much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my > > strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. > > Much Love and Prayers, Peggy > >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Peggy, Talked with Bill when I first came on telephone chat and it makes me feal bad that he is sliding away. He chose not to fight it. Went to florida for a few months and decided not to try treatment. So I remember. I feel real bad for him and his family. Molly sends her love to you and your pups. She is here now telling me how much she loves. I send Bill and his family my blessings and hope that gods mercy and blessings will help them in their time of need. Grey 10/05 IPF Prayer neededHi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week-end. I needprayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You knowhow families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts.It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on withyou. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands somuch..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew mystrength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired.Much Love and Prayers, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 Peggy you have won his heart...this morning my son asked if you were feeling better? We looked at your picture on the net. You are a very special lady and I'm glad you are feeling better. I'm sorry you have to go through this.Love,Cyndi (DAD PF 12/05)Peggy wrote: Give that baby a BIG HUG from me. Tell him his prayer was heard I feel so much better. The Hug was GREAT. That is the sweetest thing I have ever heard. Thank you for caring. Love and Prayers, Peggy 9/04 ipf Hi Peggy, I was talking about you at dinner tonight and my 41/2 son was asking a lot of questions...anyways to make a long story short....we just finished prayers before bedtime and he said, "God, can you please pray for mommys computer friend Peggy..she needs a big hug!" It touched my heart. Peggy everyone is praying for you. You are such a dear lady...a very special one. Hang in there. Cyndi (DAD, PF 12/05) acapulco_cottonwoodcove <russellshihaol> wrote: > > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week- end. I need > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel child. I live in MS and one of my daughters live in KY. Her son goes to school year round just about it up there and when he has a two week break she goes to visit my sister in AL and she always wants me to come over there for a few days. My sister is half between the two of us so it is a six hour drive for her and about 7 for me. She says she just can't come here because it would take to much money and she would have to stay at a motel since my sister would be coming with her. My daughter does not like her stepfather, my husband. She forgets that he is the one that is with me 24/7 and he is the one that is there when the going gets rough. She has never been here when I have a bad day and fight for every breath I take or when I am really down and all I want to do is cry. She only wants to see her mom when she thinks mom is feeling good and having a good day. My daughter in WI just refuses to come home period, she has to much on her plate she says with her 16 year old daughter and all the dance classes she has to go to with her. I just thank God that my oldest daughter takes time out of her busy day to call me 2 or 3 times a day just to say hello and see if I am ok. When my son is home he does the same and his wife is in contact with me every day and I am greatful for a daughter-in-law that cares. So my friend we all have nuts in the house and some are a lot more nuts than others. I would love to be able to see my grandchildren that live in KY and WI but I am just not able to make those long trips by myself any more and they aren't willing to come here to see me. My daughter in WI has an ex-husband that lives close by and if she came home she would be expected to go see her ex in-laws and that is the real reason she doesn't come home, she just want admit it. You hang in there and let God deal with the kids and everything will work out just as He plans for it to. I get up everyday and give the day to Him and then I try real hard not to pick it up again. Somedays I can do that and others I fight the battle not to pick it up all day. I will be praying for you and your daughter. You are blessed far beyond anything you could imagine because God has put a lot of really good people around you to pray with you and for you. May God Bless you and keep you each and every day. Barbara R IPF 1/2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 18, 2006 Report Share Posted September 18, 2006 you will be in my thoughts and prayers carolyn. may the Lord bless you in your time of need. jaime pf 10-05 > > > > Dear Peggy: > > I know how you feel. Children can be a joy but they also can break your > > heart so badly that it never mends right. I have 5 children, all grown and > > married. Only one son () lives near me, the rest live in another > state > > About three months ago, our sewer pipe broke and we were without water and > > a toilet for over a week. Both my husband and I are disabled and were > > unable to fix it, so I asked my son to please help us to use a ditch > digger > > to dig a hole (at our cost). He refused as he was busy planning a cruise > > with his wife, even though it was a month away. Well, I told my other kids > > I was disappointed in that he wouldnt help us when we were in such > desperate > > need. My other kids came 600 miles one way to help us with the sewer and > > when they got here they chewed out for not helping us. He made up a > > lie about me allowing him to be abused when he was younger and that is why > > he never comes around me. He has always had a problem with lying but > > unfortunately he is also very convincing and my other kids chose to > believe > > him. Since then I have not heard from any of them and I am heartbroken > that > > they could believe such a horrible thing about me and especially from > their > > brother who they knows lies all the time. I have never lied to my children > > and they know that too. My kids knew I was facing some medical tests that > > may show a serious condition and saw I was on oxygen while they were here, > > but they have not bothered to call me and find out how I am since they > left. > > Since then I found out I have ILD and have not called any of them to tell > > them. My husband (not their father) feels they have abandoned me because > > they saw my deterioratio! n and do nt want to have to take care of me. I > am > > afraid he may be correct because they made it clear to me on that visit > that > > none of them had room for me in their homes, if I needed help, and before > > 's lie, they were begging me to move in with them..(their words not > > mine). I have 8 grandchildren and now dont see them or hear from them > > either. I am so heartbroken but I will not call them to tell them I have a > > terminal illness because I dont want to hear false words of concern or > sound > > like I am asking for pity. As long as they want to believe I would ever > > allow any of them to be abused and not do anything about it, then we have > > nothing between us. So I feel for you Peggy, only our kids can hurt us so > > deeply and in a way no one else can. My heart too, is breaking. > > Hugs, > > Carolyn > > > > -- Re: Prayer needed > > > > Dear Peggy, > > You have such a good heart--reminds me of my Mom. One thing about kind > > hearts though, they can be easily hurt. I'm so sorry to hear about your > > disappointment this weekend. I know how much you must have been looking > > forward to seeing your grandchildren. I hope they visit soon. Until then, > > please know that you are in my prayers daily. > > Love to you, > > anne (dad ipf 03/06) > > Prayer needed > > > > > > Hi Group, Well this has been an interesting heart breaking week- end. I > need > > prayer and stronger psycho drugs. I feel like I am loosing my mind. You > know > > how families just at times go NUTS...Well my youngest is making me Nuts. > >! It's so hard when you feel like they just don't care what is going on > with > > you. Her family was to come up this week-end but Nope.. I miss my grands > so > > much..Oh well tooooo involved. Just pray for me to be able to renew my > > strength. I really need to lay down that rock.. I'm tired. > > Much Love and Prayers, Peggy > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.