Do We Truly Support?

[Guest guest]

Dear Friends in Pain and Chronic Illness,

For those who do not know me my name is , with RSD (end stage

systemic) , FM, IC in remission, structural damage leading to DDD (critical),

ruptures, nerve root compression, cervical fusion, lumbar fusion to be done,

IBS,

and will stop the list there, for as manyknow in CIP " immune mediated " variables

are involved, and this is NOT all about me.

I am a professional nurse, masters prepared--published researcher, and an

advocate not just for those in CIP, but other disorders of " mind, spirit, and

body. " I know many of you from other support networks, and " some " of you I'm

sure through advocacy, which I attribute 100% to God's will in my life.

I own and moderate two pain support arena's one is a closed group of

" hard core painers " and the other just started for " fun " where anything goes and

anyone can join--an attempt to allow " defragmentation of stress. "

One might ask why a " closed pain group. " The one group never goes above

20 members for in the true sense of the word it is " a pain family " and we

accept those who have been hit by internet predators, those who think they can

" get one over on someone in CIP " and those who need love, strength, and support

for the " person they are today " due to CIP. In short, disabled to me means

" enabled. " As it should.

I witnessed (to my great dismay) last night the most unhappy situation of

all:

1. A group I had belonged to (with an absent co mod) return, this co

mod

literally attacked a person I know who has legitimate pain,

and

suggest she go to a head doctor.

2. The Owner of the group had overlooked more than just this, but just

knowing what this would do to this fellow " pain sufferer " made

me sick and it still does.

3. This group boasts " support " but for this to occur and to remain

unseen broke my heart for I am an advocate and also write

posts that are to " help " not hurt. Some of which may seem

overwhelming (like a medication that can cause harm, etc.)

4. This is not the first such time; I've seen a group that has

spiritual

affiliation actually " cast hexes " on those in pain.

Support, understanding, and compassion are so important. We all know

when a chronic illness strikes " life as we know it " changes, and often our

family, significant others, and friends view us as a stranger. This can happen

long

past the time where say pain is controlled--for we do change (and I still say

the cup is half FULL, not half empty) and we must find positivity.

To " my friend in pain " this letter is a dedication to you--for I've seen

you on the Boards for years, and know your story. I too suffered abuse at the

hands of my mother (a 3% survivor) and know the devestation of CIP. You are

not ALONE, and we must remember in groups that call " support " as a theme, to

truly listen to those who join. No one needs to be in a group that judges

another unjustly, for what we can cause in such " hurt " is unimaginable...So to

" my

friend in pain " know that you are accepted, loved, and there are groups that

reach out, not reject...

Again for those who do not know me this may tell more about me, for those

who do (sorry), but I believe powerfully that one's pain can put one over the

edge and I've worked with crisis CIPers many a long night, and advocated for

many who live in areas where " opioid phobia " has cost lives. I also see many

physicians treated unjustly due to the DEA witchhunt.

The time is " now " and as a group(s) it is relevant that we " empathize "

with those in pain and speak as one voice....

Peace, and God's blessings to all,

Hallenbeck~Sikorsky~ BS,RN,UM,QC

Owner-Moderator

" AnGeLsInPain "

" OneVoiceInPain "

Interqual Certified

Published Psychiatric Researcher

Advocate for those in CIP, HIV, Psychologic Pain

" The Lord Will NEVER push us beyond what we can endure. "