BPD Emotional Age (was Re: Now I'm really confused!)

[Guest guest]

Just my thoughts here - but I have heard of even non-BPDs having

difficulties when their children reached an age where something

traumatic had happened to the parent. For your nada, it could be

even more than the death of her father, being how her mother then

expected her to take over and probably didn't allow her to grieve

the death of her father.

I have a girlfriend who discovered that she refused to marry anyone

because her emotions were so confused over the death of her father.

She eventually did marry - in her 40s - and to a man who was at that

time older than her father was when he died.

All I really know about identifying a BPs emotional age has been

from what I have read on this board, so you might want to querry

emotional age and see what that brings up. It is my understanding

that many KOs can say - when I was (age) years old, my mother

started treating me differently. Many BPs emotional ages are

between 2 - 5, but I believe there are others who have gained a

higher emotional age. I remember reading that nadas like babys,

because it gives them a role to play - the mother. But of course,

babies grow up, and nadas and fadas don't like to, nor can they,

support the emotional development of their children.

Sylvia

>

> Sylvia...

>

> How can you tell what your Nada's emotional age is (or rather,

> where she left off at)? My Nada started being especially mean to

> me around me becoming a teenager (maybe 10-13ish)...

> however, the only thing I can think of that she said happened to

> her around that time... was that her dad died, and her mother

> didn't know how to drive, so Nada had to drive at age 11 to get

> groceries ...could that cause someone to get emotionally

> stuck??

>

> Thanks...

>

>

> <3--XOXO--<<

>

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