Re: prayers needed

[Guest guest]

Twin.less:

Maybe 's words from another thread would help you -- here they

are:

For myself, I'm learning that BPD is best played as

a 'no-contact' sport, but that doesn't mean I am NC. (only because

I'm the daughter who lives closest to my 80 year old mom and the one

who is around to help as needed.) What it does mean is that I don't

have any answers for her. Lately, I'm trying to listen silently with

no heart emotions (I usually try to keep a small non-committal

smile on my face regardless of what I'm thinking) or tenseness

betrayed in her presence (hands open, arms uncrossed, sitting

straight but relaxed, feet flat on the floor or ankles crossed). I

try to stay very neutral, and very silent, and when she's done, I

usually reply (stock answer), " Well, Mom, you would know best (what

to do, how you feel, what you think, etc) for yourself. " And I

excuse myself politely with a quick hug - non-emotional - and

leave. When she lashes out at me verbally or is accusing and such,

I quietly tell her that I can see she's upset and I'll leave

> until she is ready to discuss things as adults. And I leave. No

hugs or anything of the sort when she's rude. The one time she

called me back as I was leaving and said she was ok now and we could

talk, I quietly told her that I was really glad she was ok, but I

wasn't and we'd talk later. " And I left. Calmness and quietness,

no information, and a quick exit are my best defenses right now. As

she changes her manipulation techniques again, I'll probably have to

change my counter-measures. The minute I get agitated or defensive

or tell her something personal about my life or beliefs, she feeds

off of it and the situation escalates. For myself, I'm having to

get rid of a lot of anger and such and can't afford a therapist, so

I'm using the techniques on the website " coping.org " to help me.

Best of luck - it ain't easy. Hey, maybe we should get " Homeland

Security " in on this because we are dealing with " terrorists " for

sure! -

Hope that helps -- be strong!

-Kyla

>

> hi y'all.

>

> I haven't been here in a bit. But, now I'm back in here..

> asking for your prayers...

>

> you are the only ones who understand.

>

> my BPD mother is in the hospital. She seems to be ok... at the

> moment. but, I have to fly home. She fell Thursday night, and a

> friend tried to call her today (Fri) and couldn't get her on the

> phone... so they called 911. Thank God she didn't break anything.

>

> I am the only child and am not looking forward to this at all.

>

> twin.less

>

[Guest guest]

I got your prayer request late last night and have been PRAYING! Any news?

let us know

john

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