Re: Also, New to Group

[Guest guest]

erbuss,

Welcome to the group. Sorry you qualify. There’s a

lot of great support and information here and other

places.

You’ll be AMAZED at how many people have experienced

EXACTLY the kinds of things you have. You’ll be

STUNNED at the similarities. You’ll DISCOVER that

you’re not alone about these things. You’ll THINK a

lot about what you read here. You’ll LEARN things you

never thought you’d learn or want to learn. You’ll

start to CHANGE your thinking and behavior to take

better care of yourself. You’ll FEEL the whole range

of emotions while you go through this journey. Best

of all, you’ll FIND parts of your self and things

about yourself that you didn’t know and are glad you

found.

Keep reading. Keep posting. Keep coming back.

One Non-BP Recovering Man

--- erbuss_mom wrote:

> I just started reading the book, " Stop Walking on

> Eggshells. " I came

> across the website that was used, and decided to

> look into it. I

> couldn't believe there was actually a support group

> for people like

> myself. I feel so vindicated reading so many

> messages, and being able

> to relate. For a while, I have been thinking I am

> crazy. I have been

> in counseling on and off for sixteen years, and

> normally because my

> mother seems to always think that I am the " bad "

> child. I have spent

> years trying to find a counselor that would tell me

> this, but to no

> avail. I finally decided to go and see a " female "

> therapist because I

> have found myself to have such problems trusting

> females. After

> several months; she has recommended this book to

> me...

>

> I wouldn't even know where to begin, except to say

> that a little over

> a year ago, my mothers therapist called me to ask me

> some questions.

> I found it interesting that with the new

> confidentiality issues, that

> she spoke to me, but I later found out that my dad

> permitted this.

> She made it quite clear after our conversation that

> my mother had a

> personality disorder. I knew she had issues, but I

> always blamed it

> on her drug and alcohol abuse. I then felt guilty

> of the boundaries I

> created, and I started feeling sorry for her. What

> a major mistake

> this was. Needless to say, I got back into

> counseling. The guilt is

> slowly lifting, but I struggle every now and then. I

> do not talk to my

> mother at this current time, and find this to be the

> easiest way to

> deal with this situation. My mother has gone to the

> depths of

> accusing my husband of sexually abusing my children,

> to telling me my

> father is gay. She was constantly aiding and

> abedding my sister and

> me to fight, and much...much...more. In the past

> sixteen years, I try

> to let my mother back into my space, but on or about

> the second year;

> I can't handle it. Two times ago; I told her the

> only way I would

> engage again with her is if she went to counseling.

> So, when her

> counselor called me; I felt I had to follow through

> on my word. Again

> it lasted for almost two years, when I found out she

> had only seen the

> counselor three times and stopped. UGHH! So, after

> one of

> her " mother a " " mother B " explosions; I parted ways

> again. This time

> I told her I needed to see at least six months of

> therapy (proof)

> until I would engage again. Needless to say, I am

> the worst child

> again, I hear from family members terrible lies she

> tells, etc....

> So, here I am hoping to learn more by joining this

> group to determine

> what my future might hold.

>

> I look forward to talking to you all.

>

> Thank you so much for your time, courage, and I am

> sure

> much...much...more.

>

> erbussmom

>

>

>

>

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