Re: Meltdown Cards

[Guest guest]

This message from Kaiden Fox arched across the cosmos:

>Parent: " I'm sorry for my child's screaming. "

>Autist: " It's OK... It's not your fault, it's the child's. "

>

>Unfortunately, the parent didn't realize that the apology was accepted and

>understood, or the parent was suffering from an exaggerated form of

>neurotypicallity which prevented her from understanding

> " theory-of-other-minds, " that she was in fact NOT her child, and not

>DIRECTLY responsible for her child's screaming.

I can't say what was going through the woman's head, but I do know from

being there that her original apology was only sarcasm to begin with -- she

wasn't actually apologizing to Parrish, but rather snapping at him in a

tone so sarcastic that even I noticed it. Him accepting the apology and

saying it was the kid's fault seemed to mess with her head, perhaps because

he was being sincerely blunt in response to her being indirectly vicious.

DeGraf ~*~ http://www.sonic.net/mustang/moggy

We all know it takes a bigger man to say " I'm sorry "

than it does to say " f*ck you. " (anon, usenet)

[Guest guest]

> I can't say what was going through the woman's head, but I do know from

> being there that her original apology was only sarcasm to begin with --

she

> wasn't actually apologizing to Parrish, but rather snapping at him in a

> tone so sarcastic that even I noticed it. Him accepting the apology and

> saying it was the kid's fault seemed to mess with her head, perhaps

because

> he was being sincerely blunt in response to her being indirectly vicious.

Hopefully, one day, " autism awareness " will mean " I know that some people

have auditory sensitivity, and cannot handle the sound of screaming

children, " rather than, " there's no way in hell I'm getting my kid

vaccinated, I'd rather have a dead kid with measles than a live kid with

autism. "

Sorry for not remembering what you said about the parent's sarcastic

reaction. My " theory of mind " problems warped the memory, becuase I

couldn't understand how anyone could be *sarcastic* to someone else's

clearly painful reaction. There's just no way in hell I could do that. At

least Parrish gets Moral High Ground points for accepting the appology.

[Guest guest]

BTW, the cards are free if you register. I'm not sure exactly what's going

on, but I've decided that I'm old enough to fit the concept of

" self-parenting, " so I put my name in both the " parent " and " child " fields.

My " rigid " sense of logic dictated that if I put my mom's name on it, I

would need her to open the package for me, in order to avoid the crime of

opening another person's mail, even though I'm registering myself as a

mutant in order to get the cards for myself.

URL again is http://www.dimensionsspeech.com/joinnar.htm

[Guest guest]

I think I want my card to say:

" I am autistic. As is common with autism, I experience accute

and sometimes life-threatening allergic reactions to many forms

of condescension, insinuation and/or derisive innuendo.

Whatever banal and self-serving misconceptions you may

personally harbor regarding autism in general---please at least

TRY to remember that I am a human being. Thank You. "

Hmmm...well, needs some work, but it's a good start.

But probably not one to give to the police!

:-)

--DKM

>

> > I can't say what was going through the woman's head, but I

do know from

> > being there that her original apology was only sarcasm to

begin with --

> she

> > wasn't actually apologizing to Parrish, but rather snapping at

him in a

> > tone so sarcastic that even I noticed it. Him accepting the

apology and

> > saying it was the kid's fault seemed to mess with her head,

perhaps

> because

> > he was being sincerely blunt in response to her being

indirectly vicious.

>

> Hopefully, one day, " autism awareness " will mean " I know that

some people

> have auditory sensitivity, and cannot handle the sound of

screaming

> children, " rather than, " there's no way in hell I'm getting my kid

> vaccinated, I'd rather have a dead kid with measles than a live

kid with

> autism. "

>

> Sorry for not remembering what you said about the parent's

sarcastic

> reaction. My " theory of mind " problems warped the memory,

becuase I

> couldn't understand how anyone could be *sarcastic* to

someone else's

> clearly painful reaction. There's just no way in hell I could do

that. At

> least Parrish gets Moral High Ground points for accepting the

appology.