Guest guest Posted October 29, 2006 Report Share Posted October 29, 2006 Here is one: " Grace just doesn't have the wisdom I do. " This was said to my MIL. Nice, nada, real nice. One day, hopefully I too will have the wisdom to call my daughter's MIL and bash her. Yes, this is truly the goal I will aspire to. (LOL) Also, nada said I am " a work in progress. " As opposed to WHAT? A finished product of perfection? Who isn't a work in progress? At least I'm MAKING progress, unlike nada, who seems to get worse and worse. > > > > Whether to enlighten or make us laugh, I thought it would be > > entertaining to start a post of " ridiculous things our BP parent (s) > > have said. " Here is my contribution: > > > > " You only let us come over when it's convenient for you! " > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 31, 2006 Report Share Posted October 31, 2006 My Grannada hides behind her tharapist alot, as in " My therapist says____ " . Her most recent is that her therapist says she has the right to demand respect in her own house. Or from her family. Or from friends. or from door-to-door salesmen and the poor checkout girl in the grocery store. She didn't like it when I pointed out that ALL adults have to earn respect, and that most of them won't give it if they're not treated with it. She got all different kinds of offended cuz I guess somewhere I'd said she was disrespectful, but I don't recall that part of the conversation. I actually found the whole thing rather amusing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2006 Report Share Posted November 1, 2006 These are sooo awesome. Thanks for prompting us all to reflect on the absurdities of a borderline. I think humor is good for the soul and being able to detach and ponder these insanities is a sign of NOT being crazy like them. Dh and I do this regularly w/fun nada stuff. One of my favorites quotes nada says like all the time- I mean like a million freaking times to soooo many people- " Just get over it! " This coming from a woman who is still mad at her dead mother for criticizing the casket nada picked out for my dead father's funeral over 25 years ago. Just get over it nada. Same woman who still holds a grudge against psycho uncle who stole money from them when my dad was dieing almost 30 years ago. Oh I could go on and on and on and on about the brilliant ways nada just gets over things. Just get over it! LOL. Grandfada, nada's dad and the one who seems more bpish to me, also said to auntie one time that " It's just not Christian for Kerrie to be so unforgiving. " when referring to my nada and my relationship- as though he understood what was in my heart and what I have and have not forgiven. Anyway, I think this is hysterical coming from a man who still refers to his paternal grandparents as 'the bit & h and the b@$tard.' People who've been dead for well over 40 years-lol. Hmm. Yes, I could learn a lot about Christian forgiveness from the likes of him. NOT! Another one that I found hysterical was when nada was quoting to me about reading that forgiveness was much less about other people and more about setting yourself free. She said this to me on the phone last summer when I was really good at setting boundaries and I suppose she thought I was having issues w/forgiveness and her which was NOT the case at all- more like boundary setting which bp's hate. Anyway, then in March when her fiance killed himself she begged and pleaded for MY forgiveness (and of course had to add in the absurd- " And I forgive you too. " ), but I got the coup de gras w/saying 'last year nada you told me forgiveness is much less about the other person and more about you setting you free. I couldn't agree more.' And thereby sidestepping any notion that I had to step up and apologize or ask what the hell she meant w/forgiving me-lol- that was about her being free according to her own words the summer before. She doesn't need me for that one- lol. Let's see. Here's some fun ones that dh and I love to share together behind nada's back. BPs love everything big and nada has the biggest blue bowl EVER for mixing. I mean honestly, I've never seen a bigger bowl in my entire life! Its plastic and when dh and I were engaged she just bought it out and was showing it off- look how big it is, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, dh said 'What do you plan on doing w/that bowl? Blocking out the sun and holding some third world nation hostage?'- ROFL. That's when I knew he could hold his own as nada had to laugh too. Of course she got him a big blue bowl for Christmas that year, just not one as big as her's. One that dh loves that I said was a few years back nada started having some arthritis issues or some kind of joint inflamation problems in her hands. Anyway she was talking to us about it and the tip of her forefinger was just bent over and arched, wouldn't go up straight, and of course bps can make everything a big deal and I've always been kindn of the funny one although all bad too in the family. I just popped out with " oh, that's probably the result of pointing the finger at other people too much. " - ROFL-dh and I just died laughing and she had a nervous laugh about that one. There was a while nada was actually incharge of departments at work, very scarey, and was on this firing spree- fired like 5 or 6 people in a year's time span or something absurd. That was right when the Apprentice was on air first season and so dh started saying whenever he was around her " Hey " or " You're fired! " Grandnada's favorite absurd quote- 'sitting in a church don't no more make you a Christian than sitting in a hen house will make you a chicken.' Ugh. Do I even need to ellaborate on the absurdity of this statement coming from a witchy-poo-queen grandnada? Just a few. Have like a gazillion more dh and I laugh about a lot. Thanks for starting this thread. Kerrie > > Whether to enlighten or make us laugh, I thought it would be > entertaining to start a post of " ridiculous things our BP parent(s) > have said. " Here is my contribution: > > " You only let us come over when it's convenient for you! " > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2006 Report Share Posted November 1, 2006 I love your husband's reply on the blue blow. Sure helps to see the ridiculous in situations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2006 Report Share Posted November 1, 2006 Ok. Here's one of my favorite nada stories. My nada was taking her nightly shower and washing her hair when the power went out. When she openned her eyes it was pitch black. She screamed, " Help, , help. I'm blind!!! " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 1, 2006 Report Share Posted November 1, 2006 LOL -- that's TOO HILARIOUS!!! It seems like nadas just lack that " common sense " gene sometimes.... I'm SO loving this thread! Shana Re: The Ridiculous Things BP Parents Say To: WTOAdultChildren1 > Ok. Here's one of my favorite nada stories. > > My nada was taking her nightly shower and washing her hair when > the > power went out. When she openned her eyes it was pitch black. > She > screamed, " Help, , help. I'm blind!!! " > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 2, 2006 Report Share Posted November 2, 2006 Kerrie, YOUR DH IS HILARIOUS! I haven't laughed that hard in a while! > > > > Whether to enlighten or make us laugh, I thought it would be > > entertaining to start a post of " ridiculous things our BP parent(s) > > have said. " Here is my contribution: > > > > " You only let us come over when it's convenient for you! " > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 2, 2006 Report Share Posted November 2, 2006 I was a 14 year old with my first tube of red lipstick Nada laughed when I put on red lipstick and told me You look like a chicken going north For those that did not grow up on a farm (and are not cruel) my face looked like the back end of a chicken and my mouth (red lipstick) looked like a chicken's a**hole. Whatta sweetie !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 2, 2006 Report Share Posted November 2, 2006 , Yes, I think he's very hysterical too. He definitely keeps me on my toes and very grounded. He really does keep things in perspective. Just last night he started in on a story and did the stop, ya know what I mean? Like people start telling stories and then stop and say 'oh no, this is just too bad to repeat.' and it graits on my nerves when people do that, but I've learned the less interested I am in what they have to say the more they just have to say it and so I did that reverse psychology on him. Anyway, he was sharing how he wanted to send a 'gift' to nada for Christmas saying 'since you miss the grandkids so much, we thought we'd send you something to remember them by' and fill up the box w/dirty diapers. ROFL. That guy just kills me sometimes. Kerrie > > > > > > Whether to enlighten or make us laugh, I thought it would be > > > entertaining to start a post of " ridiculous things our BP parent (s) > > > have said. " Here is my contribution: > > > > > > " You only let us come over when it's convenient for you! " > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 2, 2006 Report Share Posted November 2, 2006 CD, It must have been JUNGLE RED!!! LOL (she was just jealous b/c you were so beautiful and young) Re: The Ridiculous Things BP Parents Say I was a 14 year old with my first tube of red lipstick Nada laughed when I put on red lipstick and told me You look like a chicken going north For those that did not grow up on a farm (and are not cruel) my face looked like the back end of a chicken and my mouth (red lipstick) looked like a chicken's a**hole. Whatta sweetie !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 2, 2006 Report Share Posted November 2, 2006 >> 5. " Why can't we have a relationship like other mother's and daughters? " And my nada's twist on #5 - All mothers and daughters have their differences! Sylvia > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 2, 2006 Report Share Posted November 2, 2006 Trish and Liz, My nada was saying the same things!~ Oh My GOSH this gets better and better! I was sharing all these posts w/ dh and he reminded me of 2 more! " I wasn't going to tell you but...(fill in the blank her like I was fake sick again) " and " My love is unconditional " I just love all these you guys We are getting a good laugh over here! Love Lizzy > > > > > > > > 1. " I deserve some respect, I'm your mother " > > > > 2. " Can't you see that you are the most important person in the > > world to > > > > me? " > > > > 3. " You are no longer part of my family " > > > > 4. " Why do you do things to hurt me? " > > > > 5. " Why can't we have a relationship like other mother's and > > daughters? " > > > > > > > > AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE.......... > > > > > > > > 6. " Have you joined a cult? " > > > > > > > > Enjoy !! > > > > KW > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 4, 2006 Report Share Posted November 4, 2006 Lizzy, " I wasn't going to tell you but. . . " really pisses me off. As if nada has any kind of filtering device to control the garbage that comes out of her mouth. My nada always uses that to drop some drama bomb. She doesn't have any fake illnesses though, she usually just saves up nasty information (somebody died, somebody's got a horrible disease, whatever) and drops it later just to annoy you. I've actually gotten pretty brazen and when I hear that line, I just say, " THEN DON'T! " It doesn't make you any friends, but I'm SOOOO tired of getting drama dumped on me. Trish > > > > > > > > > > 1. " I deserve some respect, I'm your mother " > > > > > 2. " Can't you see that you are the most important person in > the > > > world to > > > > > me? " > > > > > 3. " You are no longer part of my family " > > > > > 4. " Why do you do things to hurt me? " > > > > > 5. " Why can't we have a relationship like other mother's > and > > > daughters? " > > > > > > > > > > AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE.......... > > > > > > > > > > 6. " Have you joined a cult? " > > > > > > > > > > Enjoy !! > > > > > KW > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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