New member introduction

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone. My name is and I live in Houston. I will be 35 on Monday, and

I was diagnosed with Type 2 in Aug of 96. I did really good at first, but now I

really struggle with everything I am supposed to do. It's like some kind of

rebellion I guess, I don't know. Anyway, I thought maybe I could make some

friends here, and have some support from people who understand, instead of

everyone who just thinks it's so easy and I should " just do it. "

For the first 2 years I was on Glucophage and Amaryl. I did good from Aug when I

was diagnosed, until Christmas. I think I was just scared to death. But during

the holidays I blew it. I ate all the desserts and stuff, and then I couldn't

stop the cravings for the carbs. I never really got control again after that. I

stopped checking my blood sugar, I was eating whatever I wanted, and taking my

pills when I felt like it. My family and friends begged me to take care of

myself. I had a new baby nephew and my brother told me " I don't want to have to

tell my boys about you. I want you to be there- for their ball games, and

graduations, and weddings, and everything else. " I really tried but it was hard

even with that. And I was losing weight like crazy and I loved it. In a 2 year

period I lost 200 lbs.

Then, in Oct 1998 I ended up in ICU on a 24 hour insulin drip. I was in

ketoacidosis, and in the ER my blood sugar was almost 700. No telling how long

it had been that way- I hadn’t been checking. I came out of there on insulin,

and for about a month I had insulin edema. I swelled up like a balloon and

gained 45 lbs of fluid the first two weeks. But the reaction had to run its

course and I never lost it all. In fact, in 2 ½ years I have gained back almost

all 200 lbs. I take my insulin, but I still don’t eat right or take good care

of myself. And I am frequently having bg’s over 300. I don’t even go to the

doctor because I am ashamed of gaining all that weight back. My brother’s new

thing to use is " OK you just go ahead and kill yourself. But right before you

die, I want you to tell my boys the reason you’re dying is that you didn’t

care enough about them to see them grow up. " Ouch. That’s not true. I adore

them and he knows it. But it’s still so hard for me.

I have got to do something. I am hoping to find some support in this group.

Didn't mean to dump all my struggles on you. But I thought maybe you would

understand.