Guest guest Posted September 9, 2011 Report Share Posted September 9, 2011 Thank you, Helen and , for all the great work you do. Aspires has saved me, and my relationship, so its always going to be a place where I draw succour, and hopefully share that in return. Judy B Subject: Re: ASPIRESTo: aspires-relationships Date: Friday, 9 September, 2011, 21:09 Glad to see you're still around, Helen, and helping to keep ASPIRES a good, safe place for us Aspies and NT's to learn from and help each other. I'm often too busy in other pursuits to check in much but things are going well and I'm glad that's the case. Sent via BlackBerry Sender: aspires-relationships Date: Fri, 09 Sep 2011 19:44:42 -0000 To: <aspires-relationships > ReplyTo: aspires-relationships Subject: ASPIRES In light of a rather vitriolic private email I've just received, although I think most of us understand Newland's vision for ASPIRES and how groups like this operate, I want to make sure everyone understands that we are not an online therapy group. This is a PRIVATE discussion group, there are no mental health experts overseeing this board, and no one is getting paid, LOL. We are all ordinary folks here. Sometimes people get confused about that, and think that the existing membership and the listowner owe it to them to bend to their particular terms of how this informal online social group should conduct itself. They are wrong. Like any informal social group, it operates by its own particular codes. hose that consistently violate them will face censure of some sort, just as they would in their day to day lives. The flavour of this group is very unique. There are few online self help groups such as ASPIRES where both AS and NT are welcome. Here, each side consistently communicates respectfully towards one another, and thus we are able to continue to learn from one another. Collectively, this is a very intelligent group!Here, discussion and differing opinions are always welcome, but personal attacks are not. The safety and dignity of existing members is paramount, and those that feel otherwise are free to start their own online group and engage in the flavour of discourse that is agreeable to them. ASPIRES is like a family, intends to keep ASPIRES safe place for all its members. - HelenModerator of ASPIRES Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 9, 2011 Report Share Posted September 9, 2011 JUDY BARROW wrote: > > > Thank you, Helen and , for all the great work you do. Aspires has > saved me, and my relationship, so its always going to be a place where I > draw succour, and hopefully share that in return. I'll second you on that, Judy. In all of my travels in online Aspieland, I've never had such a consistently positive experience as I have in this group. IMO, and Helen do an exemplary job of steering the ASPIRES ship through all sorts of sea conditions. That, in turn, has a way of attracting and retaining a certain caliber of member. That the group has managed over many years to sustain a high quality of discussion and civil discourse is a testament to their hard work and heart. Best, ~CJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 10, 2011 Report Share Posted September 10, 2011 I have to say thank you to almost everyone here. I have no place to go to check in on what's the norm for most with AS. I realize every situation is different. I kind of gauge my own situation from what people are posting. I get caught up in the daily frustrations of AS in my own life. There was a post from someone who said they hated AS and after the day I had with my husb I agreed with everything she said. As the say went on others posted helpful and supportivei input. This group helps me keep things is perspective, helps me see a life with AS. Yesterday started off like a day from Hell. It started before I even got out of bed. Husb was getting dressed for work. I said I didn't see the veggies he got from the market. OMG! he went off, " Did you look? Why are you always thinking I don't do anything? " . I asked him because as I was starting my day, I was thinking about what I was going to make for dinner. I didn't think there was anything more than just that to my question. I told him I made a salad for lunch yesterday and didn't see anything in the veggie bin. He said, " did you even look in the other bin? " . The point was I didn't look for veggies because I wasn't checking on him, I merely wanted to know so I could plan dinner for the evening. I pointed out to him the reason for my question and he went on to say that I am controlling and that it's only my rule to keep fruit in one bin and veggies in another and " LOOK " as he's opening the fridge " THEY ARE NOT MARKED " . Now it's become my problem. I was so mad, it got very heated, all over veggies. This is why I was leaving him and thought we had made some progress in therapy but this just threw us right back where we were. I cried and cried while showering. I do hate AS. He really thinks I was accussing him of not getting veggies. When I told my friend today, he was shocked, as most people are when I mention some of the most bizarre tantrums he has. Last night there was no talking between us. I don't even know what to say to him. I know if I go home and just pretend nothing happened he would be as happy as a clam. I don't know if I can continue with the extreme ups and downs. If you asked him it's all me. Living with AS is rough enough, when I read what people are going through on a daily basis from both sides, AS and NTs it reminds me I am not alone. It was a little disheartening reading the posts yesterday. We all are trying learn and support each other here. Thanks again to everyone who gives support and love. Kathi > > > > Subject: Re: ASPIRES > To: aspires-relationships > Date: Friday, 9 September, 2011, 21:09 > > > Â > > > > Glad to see you're still around, Helen, and helping to keep ASPIRES a good, safe place for us Aspies and NT's to learn from and help each other. I'm often too busy in other pursuits to check in much but things are going well and I'm glad that's the case. > > Sent via BlackBerry > > > > Sender: aspires-relationships > Date: Fri, 09 Sep 2011 19:44:42 -0000 > To: <aspires-relationships > > ReplyTo: aspires-relationships > Subject: ASPIRES > > Â > > In light of a rather vitriolic private email I've just received, although I think most of us understand Newland's vision for ASPIRES and how groups like this operate, I want to make sure everyone understands that we are not an online therapy group. This is a PRIVATE discussion group, there are no mental health experts overseeing this board, and no one is getting paid, LOL. We are all ordinary folks here. > > Sometimes people get confused about that, and think that the existing membership and the listowner owe it to them to bend to their particular terms of how this informal online social group should conduct itself. They are wrong. Like any informal social group, it operates by its own particular codes. hose that consistently violate them will face censure of some sort, just as they would in their day to day lives. > > The flavour of this group is very unique. There are few online self help groups such as ASPIRES where both AS and NT are welcome. Here, each side consistently communicates respectfully towards one another, and thus we are able to continue to learn from one another. Collectively, this is a very intelligent group! > > Here, discussion and differing opinions are always welcome, but personal attacks are not. The safety and dignity of existing members is paramount, and those that feel otherwise are free to start their own online group and engage in the flavour of discourse that is agreeable to them. > > ASPIRES is like a family, intends to keep ASPIRES safe place for all its members. > > - Helen > Moderator of ASPIRES > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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