Re: Problems with LC Nada

[Guest guest]

This is going to sound terrible, however, look up the homeless shelters in your

area. Then when she shows up on your doorstep hand them to her and tell her

good luck. It is not your job to take care of her because she can't keep

herself together.

Lilly

pa18222 wrote:

Hi, I've been reading posts on the group for awhile now and getting

alot of comfort and good advice from them, but have never posted

myself.

I've been LC contact with my waif Nada for about a year. She is not

diagnosed, but has just about all the items on the checklist for BPD

diagnosis. Because she is a waif and we are limited contact, she

hasn't screamed at me in a long time. And alot of the things from my

childhood and adolescence (which is when my father left and it got

really bad) I have blocked out of my memory. So sometimes I really

doubt myself - is she really BPD or some other mental illness. But

my brother stayed with her a couple of months ago and said she had

these " excorist " screaming flip-out sessions, so I'm keeping my gut

feeling that she is BPD.

Anyway, the reason I'm finally posting is because her work called me

tonight because I'm the emergency contact and said she hasn't been in

for three days and hasn't called in. I contacted the police in her

town to do a well-being check. They didn't call me back, so after

crying and shaking for an hour (she's threatened suicide many times)

I finally called the police dept and asked if they had been there

yet? They said yes, she was there and said she was going to call

me. I tried to call cell and home phones, and no answer. I don't

know what to do now. If she loses her job, she will lose her

apartment and probably show up at my door with her suitcases like she

has before. She is also an alcoholic. She married an alcohic who

had to go into a nursing home due to a stroke and liver failure and

she just abandoned him - never goes to see him, moved out of his

house.

She has noone else in her life and craves someone to " take care " of

her. There is no way I can have her here, it would destroy me.

I'm sorry this is so long. A.

---------------------------------

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[Guest guest]

First of don't worry about length, somtimes the more details we know the more we

can help. You're not alone in the waif scenerio. Luckily my nada hasn't shown

up at my doorstep (I'd have the police remove her from my doorstep) Howeever

with the same problems no real job from what I last heard may have had a loosign

the house instance but worked it out with the bank. As well as the waif from

who knows when. Also very take care of me. You're definately not alone and

remebe3r that line in SBM which says sometimes the KO must swim to shore alone

or both KO and nada drown. That's what reminds me to steer clear and keep out

of trouble.

MC

pa18222 wrote: Hi, I've

been reading posts on the group for awhile now and getting

alot of comfort and good advice from them, but have never posted

myself.

I've been LC contact with my waif Nada for about a year. She is not

diagnosed, but has just about all the items on the checklist for BPD

diagnosis. Because she is a waif and we are limited contact, she

hasn't screamed at me in a long time. And alot of the things from my

childhood and adolescence (which is when my father left and it got

really bad) I have blocked out of my memory. So sometimes I really

doubt myself - is she really BPD or some other mental illness. But

my brother stayed with her a couple of months ago and said she had

these " excorist " screaming flip-out sessions, so I'm keeping my gut

feeling that she is BPD.

Anyway, the reason I'm finally posting is because her work called me

tonight because I'm the emergency contact and said she hasn't been in

for three days and hasn't called in. I contacted the police in her

town to do a well-being check. They didn't call me back, so after

crying and shaking for an hour (she's threatened suicide many times)

I finally called the police dept and asked if they had been there

yet? They said yes, she was there and said she was going to call

me. I tried to call cell and home phones, and no answer. I don't

know what to do now. If she loses her job, she will lose her

apartment and probably show up at my door with her suitcases like she

has before. She is also an alcoholic. She married an alcohic who

had to go into a nursing home due to a stroke and liver failure and

she just abandoned him - never goes to see him, moved out of his

house.

She has noone else in her life and craves someone to " take care " of

her. There is no way I can have her here, it would destroy me.

I'm sorry this is so long. A.

---------------------------------

Ahhh...imagining that irresistible " new car " smell?

Check outnew cars at Yahoo! Autos.