when someone you love passes away

[Guest guest]

Hey everyone,

I just found out this morning that one of my ex-boyfriend's mother died this

morning. She was on hospice, but I wanted to get to IN to see her (I am in

Denver) before she died. I didn't make it in time. She was like a mother

figure to me (the mother isn't really a mother to me). My ex-boyfriend told

me today that his mom loved me so much and it makes me cry because someone

loves me! She treated me with love too. This is unusual for my life.

People who say they love me usually hurt me, they aren't usually nice to me.

I am hurting a lot emotionally, and physically of course. I wish I had a

lot of hugs and a lot of people to distract me from the sadness and

emptiness I feel.

Sierra

[Guest guest]

Sierra,

I am so sorry honey!!! If there is anything I can do or you just need someone

to listen, just send me an email. I'm here for you. I know this is truly the

worst kind of pain.

Big strong warm hugs,

Caitlin

---------------------------------

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[Guest guest]

I am dealing with quite a bit of pain right now so I am sorry it has taken me a

while to respond.

The one thing I want you to remember is that if you loved her she knew it.

There is one main thing about love. The other person cannot help but feel it.

If you hate someone they feel that also. Both love and hate are very strong

emotions. The person you love or hate can feel the emotion. So be assured she

knew how you felt.

I am sure you are sad. No matter who it is that we love, when they die we are

sad. We are sad for ourselves because they are gone out of our lives. No

longer will we be able to make plans to see them like in our case, pick up the

phone to call them as in other people's cases or even to write them a letter.

No longer will we be able to even give them a hug. However despite all of this

sadness there is a hope.

This hope begins today. Starting today you can pass on the love you had for her

to someone else. Think of what you loved about her. Was it her smile, was it

the way she cooked, maybe the way she made you feel, perhaps the way she talked

to you. Whatever it was please take that and give that to at least one other

person. Purpose in your heart to give that to one other or even better to two

other people. For in the giving of that one thing you will have it given back

to you. What better way to honor her memory that to give her love away.

This is what I mean. Start writing it down. Dear....., Today I gave some of

your love away. Today I baked cookes with Janet, the girl across the hallway.

Her mom doesn't spend time with her because she is a single parent and she is

tired after work so today we made cookies. You would have loved how much fun we

had. So today I shared some of your love. Do you remember when we made cookies

together? Remember the cookie dough that tasted funny because we added to much

salt?

Do you undersand what I mean? It may take you a week or so to figure out what

her love is responsible for in your life, but I assure you it is there. Let me

know if you get stuck and I will help you. Even though you live in pain there is

something that you can do to share the love. Never ever foget that in the

sharing her love will come back to you over and over again. Hope this helps.

The death is hard. You can get through it. Believe me I know. Gwen

[Guest guest]

I am dealing with quite a bit of pain right now so I am sorry it has taken me a

while to respond.

The one thing I want you to remember is that if you loved her she knew it.

There is one main thing about love. The other person cannot help but feel it.

If you hate someone they feel that also. Both love and hate are very strong

emotions. The person you love or hate can feel the emotion. So be assured she

knew how you felt.

I am sure you are sad. No matter who it is that we love, when they die we are

sad. We are sad for ourselves because they are gone out of our lives. No

longer will we be able to make plans to see them like in our case, pick up the

phone to call them as in other people's cases or even to write them a letter.

No longer will we be able to even give them a hug. However despite all of this

sadness there is a hope.

This hope begins today. Starting today you can pass on the love you had for her

to someone else. Think of what you loved about her. Was it her smile, was it

the way she cooked, maybe the way she made you feel, perhaps the way she talked

to you. Whatever it was please take that and give that to at least one other

person. Purpose in your heart to give that to one other or even better to two

other people. For in the giving of that one thing you will have it given back

to you. What better way to honor her memory that to give her love away.

This is what I mean. Start writing it down. Dear....., Today I gave some of

your love away. Today I baked cookes with Janet, the girl across the hallway.

Her mom doesn't spend time with her because she is a single parent and she is

tired after work so today we made cookies. You would have loved how much fun we

had. So today I shared some of your love. Do you remember when we made cookies

together? Remember the cookie dough that tasted funny because we added to much

salt?

Do you undersand what I mean? It may take you a week or so to figure out what

her love is responsible for in your life, but I assure you it is there. Let me

know if you get stuck and I will help you. Even though you live in pain there is

something that you can do to share the love. Never ever foget that in the

sharing her love will come back to you over and over again. Hope this helps.

The death is hard. You can get through it. Believe me I know. Gwen