Re: Disrespecful co-workers

February 2, 2010

When I worked in an office environment I used headphones. When I couldn't and was forced to listen to the woman next to me eat chips at a very drawn out rate I snapped. Calmly I asked if I could talk to her about something. When I had her attention I openly explained in a gently but direct way the issue of this condition. I expressed how it made me feel quite openly and how I was sorry for encroaching ( I think that's the right word) on her life but it was out of my control to be any other way. Because I had taken her aside and was open and truthful it made a remarkable difference, even the people who joked about it stopped because they realised it was a serious thing.I think that is the hardest thing to express but when they understand its serious ussaly they respect you.Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone on 3Date: Wed, 03 Feb 2010 03:13:39 -0000To: <Soundsensitivity >Subject: Disrespecful co-workers I hate it when the subject of my 'gum issue' comes up and they will chomp in my face or like today pass around gum under the 'funny pretense' to annoy me.I makes me so mad. I have no idea how to even confront that. They would be like 'oh come on we're just joking'. And we are discouraged from 'triangulating' which my manager has taken that to mean even bringing things like that to her is not acceptable. She would ask me how can I handle it in the future. And try to find options with me.In the loose context I find it to be a hostile work environment and such that I can't even talk to my boss about it.How do others deal with the work issue? I know some have been able to where headphones or work from home but I know not all of us can be that fortunate.

February 2, 2010

When I worked in an office environment I used headphones. When I couldn't and was forced to listen to the woman next to me eat chips at a very drawn out rate I snapped. Calmly I asked if I could talk to her about something. When I had her attention I openly explained in a gently but direct way the issue of this condition. I expressed how it made me feel quite openly and how I was sorry for encroaching ( I think that's the right word) on her life but it was out of my control to be any other way. Because I had taken her aside and was open and truthful it made a remarkable difference, even the people who joked about it stopped because they realised it was a serious thing.I think that is the hardest thing to express but when they understand its serious ussaly they respect you.Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone on 3Date: Wed, 03 Feb 2010 03:13:39 -0000To: <Soundsensitivity >Subject: Disrespecful co-workers I hate it when the subject of my 'gum issue' comes up and they will chomp in my face or like today pass around gum under the 'funny pretense' to annoy me.I makes me so mad. I have no idea how to even confront that. They would be like 'oh come on we're just joking'. And we are discouraged from 'triangulating' which my manager has taken that to mean even bringing things like that to her is not acceptable. She would ask me how can I handle it in the future. And try to find options with me.In the loose context I find it to be a hostile work environment and such that I can't even talk to my boss about it.How do others deal with the work issue? I know some have been able to where headphones or work from home but I know not all of us can be that fortunate.

February 2, 2010

Until two weeks ago, I didn't know this was a common thing or 4s or whatever.

I've always thought ppl were just gross and I never handled the situation from a

victim's standpoint. I've always demeaned the person chewing loud and I really

don't see any reason to stop now.

I'm not telling them I have a disorder, I'm telling them to shut the f*ck up or

if you refer back to my post when that giant lady bugged me at the show, I made

HER uncomfy.

You may not like it but it's either us or them. I do it with humor, but pretty

much I am the female Dr. (the show Scrubs) or a younger, less wealthy

(Will and Grace) and I establish that wherever I go.

The reality is that they don't HAVE to chew the gum and you HAVE to work. Gum

chomping is gross, working is survival, you shouldn't have to feel bad about

asking or demanding a cow free environment.

I demand with a sense of entitlement and I get it - most of the time. Mind you

this was in work situations not everywhere else.

You are entitled they are not! It's common etiquette to eat only in designated

areas and with one's mouth SHUT.

If you have a good sense of humor and aren't whiney, you can demand anything.

Most of you cop out and say you aren't confrontational, well maybe it's time you

are! Defend yourselves! No one else will. Are you really willing to lose an

income instead of telling someone to act like they weren't raised in a cave?

Really? You aren't willing to change to be slightly aggressive but you are

willing to change your life in hidden, uncomfortable ways therefore becoming

someone's little beeeatch. Change is inevitable, you decide how it will be or

someone else gets to.

The first I hear the gum chewing I get right up in there and go " Yeah, that's

disgusting, no chewing around me and I'm telling you for the well being of both

of us. A, prison issue jumpsuits aren't flattering on me and B, well you look

so good with teeth, we don't want to screw with perfection right? "

Women get pissier than men do with me, but I don't care. If you are a guy

though, women will submit to your request. If you do it sounding like a big

ghetto Tranny, you can get away with anything with either sex, but you have to

establish your ground as soon as you start a job or when the chewing first

starts.

If you are all polite and meek and ask they stop, you are painting a target on

yourselves. If you blow up like a maniac in " I can't take it anymore mode "

you're screwed too.

If you act like a victim, you get treated like one.

Who gets hurt if you're bossy about chewing? No one.

If this is a line of thinking you want to pursue, I highly suggest you watch

several hours of stand up comedy to school you.

My sister used to torture me as a child with the chewing, and then I figured out

what she hated. If I click my fingernails together, I can have her writhing on

the floor in agony in under ten seconds, but alas there is no need now, we're

adults. Ironicly, her own daughter drives her bats with her chewing. Yep she is

just as bad as me with the noises now.

I wish I had some great mystical, buddhist saying that could take all of you and

your chewers to some higher plain of peace but the fact is ppl are mostly

a-holes. Until some other reality is invented, you kind of have to get on board

with that.

It will all work out somehow =)

>

> I hate it when the subject of my 'gum issue' comes up and they will chomp in

my face or like today pass around gum under the 'funny pretense' to annoy me.

>

> I makes me so mad. I have no idea how to even confront that. They would be

like 'oh come on we're just joking'. And we are discouraged from

'triangulating' which my manager has taken that to mean even bringing things

like that to her is not acceptable. She would ask me how can I handle it in the

future. And try to find options with me.

>

> In the loose context I find it to be a hostile work environment and such that

I can't even talk to my boss about it.

>

> How do others deal with the work issue? I know some have been able to where

headphones or work from home but I know not all of us can be that fortunate.

>

February 2, 2010

I'm super glad that worked for you, it's great to see that some ppl are cool

like that.

>

> When I worked in an office environment I used headphones. When I couldn't and

was forced to listen to the woman next to me eat chips at a very drawn out rate

I snapped. Calmly I asked if I could talk to her about something. When I had her

attention I openly explained in a gently but direct way the issue of this

condition. I expressed how it made me feel quite openly and how I was sorry for

encroaching ( I think that's the right word) on her life but it was out of my

control to be any other way. Because I had taken her aside and was open and

truthful it made a remarkable difference, even the people who joked about it

stopped because they realised it was a serious thing.

>

> I think that is the hardest thing to express but when they understand its

serious ussaly they respect you.

> Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone on 3

>

> Disrespecful co-workers

>