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the loss.

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My daughter has her first real boyfriend and she was quite anxious

to bring him home last weekend. Her biggest worry was my nada didn't

find out about him. Nada and fada live down the street from us. So

part of the weekend was spent making sure the arrival and stay of

this young man was kept very quiet.

If nada would have know, the intense questions would have started

and the judgements would have been expressed. It can just become so

crazy and painful.

The young man was so very nice and he even bought flowers to the

house.

Tonight I thought about the loss we all with this kind of parent.

I couldn't share my daughter's new friend with my mother. I couldn't

share the joy I saw with my daughter or even the gift of flowers he

bought. Normal sharings between a mother and daughter.

Whether we are in N/C or not with a BP parent something has

died in that relationship and it is loss in every sense of the word.

We have such little choice in all this and these boundaries keep the

BP's in our life in from hurting us.

Many blessings,

Malinda

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