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The only words of wisdom my mom ever shared with me were:

Men think with their d**** and don't you ever forget it. They only

want one thing...

I was about 7 when she told me this- this was the only life lesson I

received.

LOL that sounds like my nada..she never told me a thing about the monthly

curse..so you can imagine my horror when I started bleeding...( my 2 older

sisters didn't say anything either !! and the disposables from that time

frame was required to be removed right away and put in the outside trash and

not left in the bathroom trash) she never said a thing to me on my wedding

day no " talk " she never gave me " the talk "

Jackie

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if

your nadas had similar

> " words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem,

well, messed-up.

>

> Some of my recent favorites are:

>

> " Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping

yourself, because I'm all

> you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

>

> " You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do

also, because I'm your

> mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he

loves burnt toast

> because that's what his mother made "

>

> " You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends

possessions so that you have

> something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

>

> Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

>

> Melany

>

Problems? Ask our friendly List Manager for help at

@.... SEND HER ANY POSTS THAT CONCERN YOU; DO NOT Respond ON

THE GROUP.

To order the KO bible " Stop Walking on Eggshells, " call 888-35-SHELL

() for your copy. We also refer to " Understanding the Borderline

Mother " (Lawson) and " Surviving the Borderline Parent, " (Roth) which you can

find at any bookstore. Welcome to the WTO community!

From Randi Kreger, Owner BPDCentral, WTO Online Community and author SWOE

and the SWOE Workbook.

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The only words of wisdom my mom ever shared with me were:

Men think with their d**** and don't you ever forget it. They only

want one thing...

I was about 7 when she told me this- this was the only life lesson I

received.

LOL that sounds like my nada..she never told me a thing about the monthly

curse..so you can imagine my horror when I started bleeding...( my 2 older

sisters didn't say anything either !! and the disposables from that time

frame was required to be removed right away and put in the outside trash and

not left in the bathroom trash) she never said a thing to me on my wedding

day no " talk " she never gave me " the talk "

Jackie

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if

your nadas had similar

> " words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem,

well, messed-up.

>

> Some of my recent favorites are:

>

> " Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping

yourself, because I'm all

> you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

>

> " You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do

also, because I'm your

> mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he

loves burnt toast

> because that's what his mother made "

>

> " You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends

possessions so that you have

> something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

>

> Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

>

> Melany

>

Problems? Ask our friendly List Manager for help at

@.... SEND HER ANY POSTS THAT CONCERN YOU; DO NOT Respond ON

THE GROUP.

To order the KO bible " Stop Walking on Eggshells, " call 888-35-SHELL

() for your copy. We also refer to " Understanding the Borderline

Mother " (Lawson) and " Surviving the Borderline Parent, " (Roth) which you can

find at any bookstore. Welcome to the WTO community!

From Randi Kreger, Owner BPDCentral, WTO Online Community and author SWOE

and the SWOE Workbook.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest guest

The only words of wisdom my mom ever shared with me were:

Men think with their d**** and don't you ever forget it. They only

want one thing...

I was about 7 when she told me this- this was the only life lesson I

received.

LOL that sounds like my nada..she never told me a thing about the monthly

curse..so you can imagine my horror when I started bleeding...( my 2 older

sisters didn't say anything either !! and the disposables from that time

frame was required to be removed right away and put in the outside trash and

not left in the bathroom trash) she never said a thing to me on my wedding

day no " talk " she never gave me " the talk "

Jackie

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if

your nadas had similar

> " words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem,

well, messed-up.

>

> Some of my recent favorites are:

>

> " Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping

yourself, because I'm all

> you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

>

> " You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do

also, because I'm your

> mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he

loves burnt toast

> because that's what his mother made "

>

> " You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends

possessions so that you have

> something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

>

> Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

>

> Melany

>

Problems? Ask our friendly List Manager for help at

@.... SEND HER ANY POSTS THAT CONCERN YOU; DO NOT Respond ON

THE GROUP.

To order the KO bible " Stop Walking on Eggshells, " call 888-35-SHELL

() for your copy. We also refer to " Understanding the Borderline

Mother " (Lawson) and " Surviving the Borderline Parent, " (Roth) which you can

find at any bookstore. Welcome to the WTO community!

From Randi Kreger, Owner BPDCentral, WTO Online Community and author SWOE

and the SWOE Workbook.

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Share on other sites

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Oh...good thread...i'm going to remember alot as we go along, but some of my

favorites are: " When you go to a place that you don't know anybody, just stand

back and listen to what everyone says...that way you can use what they say

against them later on down the road. "

" Pay attention when people you don't know are talking....if they are talking

about someone, listen to what names they use...if the names aren't " unusual "

names then they are usually talking about you! "

This is an actual conversation that I had with my nada this weekend...She came

over to return a bowl (that wasn't mine...it was hers) and plopped down on my

sofa, blathering on and on and on about how my father was getting on her nerves

and how she had written this letter to his doctor about him having all the signs

and symptoms of early Alzheimer's. She plopped down and said " I just can't

take him any more...he's sick...I just can't take him anymore...we go out in

public and he says these things he thinks are funny, but they are

insulting...and then we will go somewhere and someone will say something and he

will reply back thinking it is funny but it will offend them! " (wait, isn't that

the same thing?) I replied " uhh-huh " ....with that she asked me for a

calendar...so I went to the kitchen and handed her one...the cat then jumped up

on the couch next to her and went " meow " ...she said " oh I know boy, I know...and

I'm sorry " ...the cat again meowed at her and she said

" what's that boy? oh yeah?...well look, this is what i wanted to show you,

right here on the calendar it says annual spring cleaning day...so see? SOME

people do still spring clean their house!..oh, I know fella...I know...I'm

sorry...well mine is all done so you can visit me...I'm sorry boy, I tried to

teach her, she does know how. " With that, she gave me the calendar and left. I

just kind of scratched my head and said to my husband " ok...is it just me?...the

cat did only say meow, right? " Without missing a beat my husband nodded his

head and saud " yep...meow...your dad is crazy, your mom thinks you need to clean

and meow...that was pretty much it. " The funny thing was, for a split second, I

was mad at my cat!

I think the funniest thing she actually said this weekend was in a reply to my

aunt when my aunt told her that my niece has a little boy who she thinks is

sweet....she said " oh thank goodness...well she needs to make sure she always

has another one waiting in the wings for her...oh, i'm so relieved to hear she

finally has a boyfriend..i didn't want to say anything but her mother can be a

little masculine, and with her hanging around girls all the time, i was worried

that she was going to be....you know...THAT way. " There are so many things

wrong with that statement, but let's start with this one....she's 3!!! My nada

is the only woman in the world who see's 2 little 2 year olds holding hands and

classifies them as " lezzy " ...it's insane! To this day, when my daughter comes

in and kisses me goodbye she channels a 6 year old and goes " ewwwwww.....that's

disgusting! "

junkinthere wrote: Hi

Everyone,

Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if your nadas had

similar

" words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem, well,

messed-up.

Some of my recent favorites are:

" Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping yourself,

because I'm all

you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

" You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do also, because

I'm your

mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he loves burnt

toast

because that's what his mother made "

" You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends possessions so that

you have

something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

Melany

Kisses and Nibbles,

Bunny

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Oh...good thread...i'm going to remember alot as we go along, but some of my

favorites are: " When you go to a place that you don't know anybody, just stand

back and listen to what everyone says...that way you can use what they say

against them later on down the road. "

" Pay attention when people you don't know are talking....if they are talking

about someone, listen to what names they use...if the names aren't " unusual "

names then they are usually talking about you! "

This is an actual conversation that I had with my nada this weekend...She came

over to return a bowl (that wasn't mine...it was hers) and plopped down on my

sofa, blathering on and on and on about how my father was getting on her nerves

and how she had written this letter to his doctor about him having all the signs

and symptoms of early Alzheimer's. She plopped down and said " I just can't

take him any more...he's sick...I just can't take him anymore...we go out in

public and he says these things he thinks are funny, but they are

insulting...and then we will go somewhere and someone will say something and he

will reply back thinking it is funny but it will offend them! " (wait, isn't that

the same thing?) I replied " uhh-huh " ....with that she asked me for a

calendar...so I went to the kitchen and handed her one...the cat then jumped up

on the couch next to her and went " meow " ...she said " oh I know boy, I know...and

I'm sorry " ...the cat again meowed at her and she said

" what's that boy? oh yeah?...well look, this is what i wanted to show you,

right here on the calendar it says annual spring cleaning day...so see? SOME

people do still spring clean their house!..oh, I know fella...I know...I'm

sorry...well mine is all done so you can visit me...I'm sorry boy, I tried to

teach her, she does know how. " With that, she gave me the calendar and left. I

just kind of scratched my head and said to my husband " ok...is it just me?...the

cat did only say meow, right? " Without missing a beat my husband nodded his

head and saud " yep...meow...your dad is crazy, your mom thinks you need to clean

and meow...that was pretty much it. " The funny thing was, for a split second, I

was mad at my cat!

I think the funniest thing she actually said this weekend was in a reply to my

aunt when my aunt told her that my niece has a little boy who she thinks is

sweet....she said " oh thank goodness...well she needs to make sure she always

has another one waiting in the wings for her...oh, i'm so relieved to hear she

finally has a boyfriend..i didn't want to say anything but her mother can be a

little masculine, and with her hanging around girls all the time, i was worried

that she was going to be....you know...THAT way. " There are so many things

wrong with that statement, but let's start with this one....she's 3!!! My nada

is the only woman in the world who see's 2 little 2 year olds holding hands and

classifies them as " lezzy " ...it's insane! To this day, when my daughter comes

in and kisses me goodbye she channels a 6 year old and goes " ewwwwww.....that's

disgusting! "

junkinthere wrote: Hi

Everyone,

Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if your nadas had

similar

" words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem, well,

messed-up.

Some of my recent favorites are:

" Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping yourself,

because I'm all

you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

" You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do also, because

I'm your

mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he loves burnt

toast

because that's what his mother made "

" You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends possessions so that

you have

something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

Melany

Kisses and Nibbles,

Bunny

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Spillproof, some of this is my nada ver batim!

> " You didn't have it that bad. You don't know what it's like to have

a difficult childhood. "

Exactly the same. I would like to add " I understand why you're upset.

People who have no problems make up things to be upset about. "

> " I would never talk to my mother the way you talk to me. "

> (Used most often when I set boundaries or stand up for myself.)

Yup

> " No one loves me. "

Instead my nada would say " My daughter hates me " or she would inquire

rhetorically " why do you hate me? " or say stuff, " Since you hate me. .

.. " Like it was just some kind of fact.

> " No one will ever love you as much as your mother loves you. "

Yup

> " I give up. "

She would exclaim " I hate it! " for no reason all the time. I would ask

her what she hates, and it would be any given thing, or everything, or

nothing specific. It's not right to grow up with such negativity.

> " I just refused to take any job that wouldn't let me be there for my

kids. "

Somehow everytime she got fired, kicked off a project, etc. It was

those other crazy people out to get her. I actually believed this

until 2 months ago. Now I'm thinking, not all those people could have

been crazy and mean. . . But she never did get a job with me in mind.

She would leave me at other people's houses or home along for long

periods (months) while she was away on business, or work late hours

when I was little. I got kicked out of after school care because she

was always late, sometimes hours late to pick me up. I have so many

memories of sitting alone with the (rightly) disgruntled after school

workers waiting for her. I used to be hungry, and at this one place

this lady would bring me creamers and sugar from Mcs. I loved it

when she came. I realize this sounds pathetic.

> " I can't take it anymore. "

Often heard for no reason that was apparent to me.

It's amazing how these things overlap.

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hahah lilly!

Reminded me when my nada would say,, " children should be seen but not

hear "

> Hi Everyone,

>

> Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if your

nadas had similar

> " words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem,

well, messed-up.

>

> Some of my recent favorites are:

>

> " Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping

yourself, because I'm all

> you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

>

> " You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do

also, because I'm your

> mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he

loves burnt toast

> because that's what his mother made "

>

> " You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends

possessions so that you have

> something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

>

> Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

>

> Melany

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Ahhh...imagining that irresistible " new car " smell?

> Check outnew cars at Yahoo! Autos.

>

>

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Oh here is another one " Don't spend too much time studying and learning too

much....men don't like women who think they are smart. "

Thank God I didn't listen to her...we would have never found our way home on our

honeymoon!

Oh...and then there is this little gem " If a man does anything nice for you,

it's because he is cheating on you. "

Beach Bunny wrote:

Oh...good thread...i'm going to remember alot as we go along, but some of my

favorites are: " When you go to a place that you don't know anybody, just stand

back and listen to what everyone says...that way you can use what they say

against them later on down the road. "

" Pay attention when people you don't know are talking....if they are talking

about someone, listen to what names they use...if the names aren't " unusual "

names then they are usually talking about you! "

This is an actual conversation that I had with my nada this weekend...She came

over to return a bowl (that wasn't mine...it was hers) and plopped down on my

sofa, blathering on and on and on about how my father was getting on her nerves

and how she had written this letter to his doctor about him having all the signs

and symptoms of early Alzheimer's. She plopped down and said " I just can't

take him any more...he's sick...I just can't take him anymore...we go out in

public and he says these things he thinks are funny, but they are

insulting...and then we will go somewhere and someone will say something and he

will reply back thinking it is funny but it will offend them! " (wait, isn't that

the same thing?) I replied " uhh-huh " ....with that she asked me for a

calendar...so I went to the kitchen and handed her one...the cat then jumped up

on the couch next to her and went " meow " ...she said " oh I know boy, I know...and

I'm sorry " ...the cat again meowed at her and she said

" what's that boy? oh yeah?...well look, this is what i wanted to show you,

right here on the calendar it says annual spring cleaning day...so see? SOME

people do still spring clean their house!..oh, I know fella...I know...I'm

sorry...well mine is all done so you can visit me...I'm sorry boy, I tried to

teach her, she does know how. " With that, she gave me the calendar and left. I

just kind of scratched my head and said to my husband " ok...is it just me?...the

cat did only say meow, right? " Without missing a beat my husband nodded his

head and saud " yep...meow...your dad is crazy, your mom thinks you need to clean

and meow...that was pretty much it. " The funny thing was, for a split second, I

was mad at my cat!

I think the funniest thing she actually said this weekend was in a reply to my

aunt when my aunt told her that my niece has a little boy who she thinks is

sweet....she said " oh thank goodness...well she needs to make sure she always

has another one waiting in the wings for her...oh, i'm so relieved to hear she

finally has a boyfriend..i didn't want to say anything but her mother can be a

little masculine, and with her hanging around girls all the time, i was worried

that she was going to be....you know...THAT way. " There are so many things

wrong with that statement, but let's start with this one....she's 3!!! My nada

is the only woman in the world who see's 2 little 2 year olds holding hands and

classifies them as " lezzy " ...it's insane! To this day, when my daughter comes

in and kisses me goodbye she channels a 6 year old and goes " ewwwwww.....that's

disgusting! "

junkinthere wrote: Hi

Everyone,

Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if your nadas had

similar

" words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem, well,

messed-up.

Some of my recent favorites are:

" Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping yourself,

because I'm all

you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

" You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do also,

because I'm your

mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he loves

burnt toast

because that's what his mother made "

" You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends possessions so that

you have

something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

Melany

Kisses and Nibbles,

Bunny

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Oh here is another one " Don't spend too much time studying and learning too

much....men don't like women who think they are smart. "

Thank God I didn't listen to her...we would have never found our way home on our

honeymoon!

Oh...and then there is this little gem " If a man does anything nice for you,

it's because he is cheating on you. "

Beach Bunny wrote:

Oh...good thread...i'm going to remember alot as we go along, but some of my

favorites are: " When you go to a place that you don't know anybody, just stand

back and listen to what everyone says...that way you can use what they say

against them later on down the road. "

" Pay attention when people you don't know are talking....if they are talking

about someone, listen to what names they use...if the names aren't " unusual "

names then they are usually talking about you! "

This is an actual conversation that I had with my nada this weekend...She came

over to return a bowl (that wasn't mine...it was hers) and plopped down on my

sofa, blathering on and on and on about how my father was getting on her nerves

and how she had written this letter to his doctor about him having all the signs

and symptoms of early Alzheimer's. She plopped down and said " I just can't

take him any more...he's sick...I just can't take him anymore...we go out in

public and he says these things he thinks are funny, but they are

insulting...and then we will go somewhere and someone will say something and he

will reply back thinking it is funny but it will offend them! " (wait, isn't that

the same thing?) I replied " uhh-huh " ....with that she asked me for a

calendar...so I went to the kitchen and handed her one...the cat then jumped up

on the couch next to her and went " meow " ...she said " oh I know boy, I know...and

I'm sorry " ...the cat again meowed at her and she said

" what's that boy? oh yeah?...well look, this is what i wanted to show you,

right here on the calendar it says annual spring cleaning day...so see? SOME

people do still spring clean their house!..oh, I know fella...I know...I'm

sorry...well mine is all done so you can visit me...I'm sorry boy, I tried to

teach her, she does know how. " With that, she gave me the calendar and left. I

just kind of scratched my head and said to my husband " ok...is it just me?...the

cat did only say meow, right? " Without missing a beat my husband nodded his

head and saud " yep...meow...your dad is crazy, your mom thinks you need to clean

and meow...that was pretty much it. " The funny thing was, for a split second, I

was mad at my cat!

I think the funniest thing she actually said this weekend was in a reply to my

aunt when my aunt told her that my niece has a little boy who she thinks is

sweet....she said " oh thank goodness...well she needs to make sure she always

has another one waiting in the wings for her...oh, i'm so relieved to hear she

finally has a boyfriend..i didn't want to say anything but her mother can be a

little masculine, and with her hanging around girls all the time, i was worried

that she was going to be....you know...THAT way. " There are so many things

wrong with that statement, but let's start with this one....she's 3!!! My nada

is the only woman in the world who see's 2 little 2 year olds holding hands and

classifies them as " lezzy " ...it's insane! To this day, when my daughter comes

in and kisses me goodbye she channels a 6 year old and goes " ewwwwww.....that's

disgusting! "

junkinthere wrote: Hi

Everyone,

Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if your nadas had

similar

" words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem, well,

messed-up.

Some of my recent favorites are:

" Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping yourself,

because I'm all

you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

" You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do also,

because I'm your

mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he loves

burnt toast

because that's what his mother made "

" You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends possessions so that

you have

something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

Melany

Kisses and Nibbles,

Bunny

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This was basically what my Fada told me. He explained the song " you

don't give me flowers " really means " you don't give me blowjobs. "

My Fada is also famous for saying " Listen to what I mean, not what I

say. " I think he thinks that lets him out of being wrong; he wasn't

wrong, he just misspoke.

Also he was famous for explaining it's the speed " limit " not

minimum... I'm still not sure how he's not been run-over by a semi.

> >

> > Hi Everyone,

> >

> > Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if

> your nadas had similar

> > " words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem,

> well, messed-up.

> >

> > Some of my recent favorites are:

> >

> > " Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping

> yourself, because I'm all

> > you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

> >

> > " You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do

> also, because I'm your

> > mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he

> loves burnt toast

> > because that's what his mother made "

> >

> > " You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends

> possessions so that you have

> > something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

> >

> > Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

> >

> > Melany

> >

>

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, Jackie, Melany, all,

Words of wisdom - ha! Nada never talked to me, only at me. Now that I

consider her 'forever five' (years old), real conversation

isn't/wasn't likely. In regard to every aspect of being female, I

raised myself. No talk when womanhood struck - she threw a GIANT pad

at me in the bathroom " Put this on. " (In gym class, wearing those

clingy gym shorts, my 80 pound body couldn't hide her GIANT pads. I

heard all the other girls whispering about me.)

The closest thing to the so-called birds and bees talk happened when

I was getting ready to go out with my boyfriend (I was 20) and nada

said, " You're playing with fire. " Huh? Okay.

Have I mentioned how entirely thankful I am to find all of you? I

just finished reading SWOE, and between that book and this group I am

floored that my mother's illness has turned out to be so specific and

the behavioral 'symptoms' so common. It's truly a nightmare for a KO.

I wonder how prevalent BP is? I wish more information was available

for young KOs. Growing up I prayed to be rescued from my home every

single day. If only another kid wouldn't have to go through that...

Unselfishly and gratefully : ) yours,

Heidi

> >

> > Hi Everyone,

> >

> > Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if

> your nadas had similar

> > " words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem,

> well, messed-up.

> >

> > Some of my recent favorites are:

> >

> > " Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping

> yourself, because I'm all

> > you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

> >

> > " You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do

> also, because I'm your

> > mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now

he

> loves burnt toast

> > because that's what his mother made "

> >

> > " You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends

> possessions so that you have

> > something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

> >

> > Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

> >

> > Melany

> >

>

>

>

>

> Problems? Ask our friendly List Manager for help at

> @... SEND HER ANY POSTS THAT CONCERN YOU; DO NOT Respond ON

> THE GROUP.

>

> To order the KO bible " Stop Walking on Eggshells, " call 888-35-

SHELL

> () for your copy. We also refer to " Understanding the

Borderline

> Mother " (Lawson) and " Surviving the Borderline Parent, " (Roth)

which you can

> find at any bookstore. Welcome to the WTO community!

>

> From Randi Kreger, Owner BPDCentral, WTO Online Community and

author SWOE

> and the SWOE Workbook.

>

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Almost all of the words of wisdom make it obvious how paranoid the BP's

are, it's quite revealing.

The first category of " advice " is mostly telling you what to do, or how

to act towards her; her wishing to control you. This doesn't reveal as

much about the BP's thoughts as it does their need for control.

But the second category of " advice " reveals more about the BP's own

thoughts and reasoning for their actions. It is all about how to use

others, or how to protect yourself from others who will eventually hurt

you, because nobody likes you but her and she can take that love away:

" Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping yourself,

because I'm all you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

" No one will ever love you as much as your mother loves you. "

" People aren't kind to you because you deserve it, they are kind

because they are kind people, remember that and be grateful. "

" No one will ever love you unless you make it worth their

while. "

" Men think with their d**** and don't you ever forget it. They only

want one thing... "

" You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends possessions so

that you have something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

" When you go to a place that you don't know anybody, just stand

back and listen to what everyone says...that way you can use what they

say

against them later on down the road. "

This just reveals such paranoia about the world around them; they feel

everyone is out to get them, to hurt them, to use them. There is never

any way to comfort those fears, they're just a hole you throw

reassurances at, and they never fill up.

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> Since we all seem to have so much in common, I was wondering if your

nadas had similar

> " words of wisdom " to depart to you that now in retrospect seem, well,

messed-up.

>

> Some of my recent favorites are:

>

> " Can't you see that when you help me, you are actually helping

yourself, because I'm all

> you've got in this world and you're all I've got. "

>

> " You should love me no matter what, and you should love what I do

also, because I'm your

> mother. Like the man whose mother always burnt the toast and now he

loves burnt toast

> because that's what his mother made "

>

> " You should always keep and hide a few of your boyfriends possessions

so that you have

> something to throw at him when you break up with him. "

>

> Anyone else want to share some messed-up " words of wisdom " ?

>

> Melany

>

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