Happy Easter - some twisted humor

[Guest guest]

Warning: This has religious content and could be considered blasphemous.

That being said, I do not intend to mock Christianity as I myself am

celebrating a beautiful Easter morning.

I was lying in bed this morning watching the sun rise, contemplating Easter,

my resurrected Savior and the beauty of forgiveness. My thoughts turned to

what the women who went to Jesus' tomb early Easter morning may have felt

when they found the tomb empty. Maybe they were awed, scared, excited, in

disbelief, etc.

Then my mind took a twisted turn and wonder what Nada might have felt if she

found an empty tomb on Easter morning.

So if , Jesus' mother, had Borderline Personality Disorder and found the

empty tomb this would have been her response to Jesus:

" How could you do this to me? I watched you die and cried my eyes out. And

you go and rise from the dead and make me look like a fool? I worked all

Sabbath to prepare these linens and spices to prepare your body for burial

and you don't even let me use them. You don't appreciate anything I do for

you. I woke up early and came all the way down here just to find you

walking around alive and in a spirit body not yet ascended to heaven yet you

won't let me hug you - how ungrateful and unloving you are! Maybe you

should just go find a new mother. I'll go live with and let you bask

in your glory all alone. " ..(later that day). " Hi Jesus, how are you? Has

your day gone better? You were awfully cranky this morning. "

Happy Easter! He is Risen!

[Guest guest]

ROFL - I can just hear it now! -

Kayne & wrote: Warning: This has

religious content and could be considered blasphemous.

That being said, I do not intend to mock Christianity as I myself am

celebrating a beautiful Easter morning.

I was lying in bed this morning watching the sun rise, contemplating Easter,

my resurrected Savior and the beauty of forgiveness. My thoughts turned to

what the women who went to Jesus' tomb early Easter morning may have felt

when they found the tomb empty. Maybe they were awed, scared, excited, in

disbelief, etc.

Then my mind took a twisted turn and wonder what Nada might have felt if she

found an empty tomb on Easter morning.

So if , Jesus' mother, had Borderline Personality Disorder and found the

empty tomb this would have been her response to Jesus:

" How could you do this to me? I watched you die and cried my eyes out. And

you go and rise from the dead and make me look like a fool? I worked all

Sabbath to prepare these linens and spices to prepare your body for burial

and you don't even let me use them. You don't appreciate anything I do for

you. I woke up early and came all the way down here just to find you

walking around alive and in a spirit body not yet ascended to heaven yet you

won't let me hug you - how ungrateful and unloving you are! Maybe you

should just go find a new mother. I'll go live with and let you bask

in your glory all alone. " ..(later that day). " Hi Jesus, how are you? Has

your day gone better? You were awfully cranky this morning. "

Happy Easter! He is Risen!

[Guest guest]

My nada would get upset about His inconsiderateness too. She would

have to go find Him, and then she would interupt Him and tell everyone

present, " He has risen! " It would then be HER story, all about HER.

She'd have to throw some big party with lots of extravagant (and

tacky) decorations, just to get the focus off of Him and back onto

her. Heaven forbid if the crowd forgot to gush and praise her

glorious decorations!

I don't mean to make fun of the resurection either, but I got a huge

kick out of your post and picturing my nada there too. (If both of

our nada's were there - oh, that would be scary!)

I am so thankful for the picture I woke up with - I am free today, not

just from my own sin, but He has set me free from the bondage of

other's sin too! I am free!

Heidi

>

> Warning: This has religious content and could be considered

blasphemous.

> That being said, I do not intend to mock Christianity as I myself am

> celebrating a beautiful Easter morning.

>

>

>

> I was lying in bed this morning watching the sun rise, contemplating

Easter,

> my resurrected Savior and the beauty of forgiveness. My thoughts

turned to

> what the women who went to Jesus' tomb early Easter morning may have

felt

> when they found the tomb empty. Maybe they were awed, scared,

excited, in

> disbelief, etc.

>

>

>

> Then my mind took a twisted turn and wonder what Nada might have

felt if she

> found an empty tomb on Easter morning.

>

>

>

> So if , Jesus' mother, had Borderline Personality Disorder and

found the

> empty tomb this would have been her response to Jesus:

>

>

>

> " How could you do this to me? I watched you die and cried my eyes

out. And

> you go and rise from the dead and make me look like a fool? I

worked all

> Sabbath to prepare these linens and spices to prepare your body for

burial

> and you don't even let me use them. You don't appreciate anything I

do for

> you. I woke up early and came all the way down here just to find you

> walking around alive and in a spirit body not yet ascended to heaven

yet you

> won't let me hug you - how ungrateful and unloving you are! Maybe you

> should just go find a new mother. I'll go live with and let

you bask

> in your glory all alone. " ..(later that day). " Hi Jesus, how are you?

Has

> your day gone better? You were awfully cranky this morning. "

>

>

>

> Happy Easter! He is Risen!

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

my nada would have been very angry with him because the world would

revolve around the Christ, son of God and not herself. Never mind

that Jesus has to bear the sins of the whole world.

Peace - C

> >

> > Warning: This has religious content and could be considered

> blasphemous.

> > That being said, I do not intend to mock Christianity as I myself

am

> > celebrating a beautiful Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > I was lying in bed this morning watching the sun rise,

contemplating

> Easter,

> > my resurrected Savior and the beauty of forgiveness. My thoughts

> turned to

> > what the women who went to Jesus' tomb early Easter morning may

have

> felt

> > when they found the tomb empty. Maybe they were awed, scared,

> excited, in

> > disbelief, etc.

> >

> >

> >

> > Then my mind took a twisted turn and wonder what Nada might have

> felt if she

> > found an empty tomb on Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > So if , Jesus' mother, had Borderline Personality Disorder and

> found the

> > empty tomb this would have been her response to Jesus:

> >

> >

> >

> > " How could you do this to me? I watched you die and cried my eyes

> out. And

> > you go and rise from the dead and make me look like a fool? I

> worked all

> > Sabbath to prepare these linens and spices to prepare your body

for

> burial

> > and you don't even let me use them. You don't appreciate

anything I

> do for

> > you. I woke up early and came all the way down here just to find

you

> > walking around alive and in a spirit body not yet ascended to

heaven

> yet you

> > won't let me hug you - how ungrateful and unloving you are!

Maybe you

> > should just go find a new mother. I'll go live with and let

> you bask

> > in your glory all alone. " ..(later that day). " Hi Jesus, how are

you?

> Has

> > your day gone better? You were awfully cranky this morning. "

> >

> >

> >

> > Happy Easter! He is Risen!

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

hahaha and to condemn that slut Magdelane to rot in hell.

(sorry if it offends anyone - but you know how jeleous they are.)

C

>

> Haha, this is too funny. I love the humor. My nada would go on to tell

> anyone and everyone she could about how her ungrateful son just upped

> and left her after all that work she did, and how terribly alone and

> sad she is now. she would not want the ensuing religion to be

> christianity, but a worship of the sacrifices of the mother of god.

>

> Mel

>

[Guest guest]

Your nada has SINS????? Oh no - you MUST be mistaken....LOL! -

Cristie Maure wrote: my nada would have been

very angry with him because the world would

revolve around the Christ, son of God and not herself. Never mind

that Jesus has to bear the sins of the whole world.

Peace - C

> >

> > Warning: This has religious content and could be considered

> blasphemous.

> > That being said, I do not intend to mock Christianity as I myself

am

> > celebrating a beautiful Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > I was lying in bed this morning watching the sun rise,

contemplating

> Easter,

> > my resurrected Savior and the beauty of forgiveness. My thoughts

> turned to

> > what the women who went to Jesus' tomb early Easter morning may

have

> felt

> > when they found the tomb empty. Maybe they were awed, scared,

> excited, in

> > disbelief, etc.

> >

> >

> >

> > Then my mind took a twisted turn and wonder what Nada might have

> felt if she

> > found an empty tomb on Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > So if , Jesus' mother, had Borderline Personality Disorder and

> found the

> > empty tomb this would have been her response to Jesus:

> >

> >

> >

> > " How could you do this to me? I watched you die and cried my eyes

> out. And

> > you go and rise from the dead and make me look like a fool? I

> worked all

> > Sabbath to prepare these linens and spices to prepare your body

for

> burial

> > and you don't even let me use them. You don't appreciate

anything I

> do for

> > you. I woke up early and came all the way down here just to find

you

> > walking around alive and in a spirit body not yet ascended to

heaven

> yet you

> > won't let me hug you - how ungrateful and unloving you are!

Maybe you

> > should just go find a new mother. I'll go live with and let

> you bask

> > in your glory all alone. " ..(later that day). " Hi Jesus, how are

you?

> Has

> > your day gone better? You were awfully cranky this morning. "

> >

> >

> >

> > Happy Easter! He is Risen!

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Your nada has SINS????? Oh no - you MUST be mistaken....LOL! -

Cristie Maure wrote: my nada would have been

very angry with him because the world would

revolve around the Christ, son of God and not herself. Never mind

that Jesus has to bear the sins of the whole world.

Peace - C

> >

> > Warning: This has religious content and could be considered

> blasphemous.

> > That being said, I do not intend to mock Christianity as I myself

am

> > celebrating a beautiful Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > I was lying in bed this morning watching the sun rise,

contemplating

> Easter,

> > my resurrected Savior and the beauty of forgiveness. My thoughts

> turned to

> > what the women who went to Jesus' tomb early Easter morning may

have

> felt

> > when they found the tomb empty. Maybe they were awed, scared,

> excited, in

> > disbelief, etc.

> >

> >

> >

> > Then my mind took a twisted turn and wonder what Nada might have

> felt if she

> > found an empty tomb on Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > So if , Jesus' mother, had Borderline Personality Disorder and

> found the

> > empty tomb this would have been her response to Jesus:

> >

> >

> >

> > " How could you do this to me? I watched you die and cried my eyes

> out. And

> > you go and rise from the dead and make me look like a fool? I

> worked all

> > Sabbath to prepare these linens and spices to prepare your body

for

> burial

> > and you don't even let me use them. You don't appreciate

anything I

> do for

> > you. I woke up early and came all the way down here just to find

you

> > walking around alive and in a spirit body not yet ascended to

heaven

> yet you

> > won't let me hug you - how ungrateful and unloving you are!

Maybe you

> > should just go find a new mother. I'll go live with and let

> you bask

> > in your glory all alone. " ..(later that day). " Hi Jesus, how are

you?

> Has

> > your day gone better? You were awfully cranky this morning. "

> >

> >

> >

> > Happy Easter! He is Risen!

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Your nada has SINS????? Oh no - you MUST be mistaken....LOL! -

Cristie Maure wrote: my nada would have been

very angry with him because the world would

revolve around the Christ, son of God and not herself. Never mind

that Jesus has to bear the sins of the whole world.

Peace - C

> >

> > Warning: This has religious content and could be considered

> blasphemous.

> > That being said, I do not intend to mock Christianity as I myself

am

> > celebrating a beautiful Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > I was lying in bed this morning watching the sun rise,

contemplating

> Easter,

> > my resurrected Savior and the beauty of forgiveness. My thoughts

> turned to

> > what the women who went to Jesus' tomb early Easter morning may

have

> felt

> > when they found the tomb empty. Maybe they were awed, scared,

> excited, in

> > disbelief, etc.

> >

> >

> >

> > Then my mind took a twisted turn and wonder what Nada might have

> felt if she

> > found an empty tomb on Easter morning.

> >

> >

> >

> > So if , Jesus' mother, had Borderline Personality Disorder and

> found the

> > empty tomb this would have been her response to Jesus:

> >

> >

> >

> > " How could you do this to me? I watched you die and cried my eyes

> out. And

> > you go and rise from the dead and make me look like a fool? I

> worked all

> > Sabbath to prepare these linens and spices to prepare your body

for

> burial

> > and you don't even let me use them. You don't appreciate

anything I

> do for

> > you. I woke up early and came all the way down here just to find

you

> > walking around alive and in a spirit body not yet ascended to

heaven

> yet you

> > won't let me hug you - how ungrateful and unloving you are!

Maybe you

> > should just go find a new mother. I'll go live with and let

> you bask

> > in your glory all alone. " ..(later that day). " Hi Jesus, how are

you?

> Has

> > your day gone better? You were awfully cranky this morning. "

> >

> >

> >

> > Happy Easter! He is Risen!

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Your comment about discriminating reminds me of an incident with mom some years

ago. She was bragging how racially color-blind she was and said, " Why, just the

other day, this little black boy came up to me and I just hugged his neck. " One

of my best friends (who is afro-american) leaned up behind me and whispered,

" Reckon what color she doesn't see??? " I thought I was going to bust. We had

to scoot out of the room to keep from rolling on the floor. We've giggled about

that for years. -

junkinthere wrote: Hahaha! I totally forgot

about the slut! Why is it that nadas seem to think that so many

women/girls are sluts and whores? Not to steer too far off topic, but nada

thought my best

friend in high school was a slut. I was trying to make a case for why my best

friend was a

good person by saying that she really appreciates all kinds of people and will

befriend

anyone from old ladies to ethiopian exchange students. Nada was like " exactly,

she's a slut

because she doesn't discriminate! " Now I'm just laughing about it because it's

so ridiculous.

Finding the humor in all this is fun.

Melany

---------------------------------

8:00? 8:25? 8:40? Find a flick in no time

with theYahoo! Search movie showtime shortcut.

[Guest guest]

Your comment about discriminating reminds me of an incident with mom some years

ago. She was bragging how racially color-blind she was and said, " Why, just the

other day, this little black boy came up to me and I just hugged his neck. " One

of my best friends (who is afro-american) leaned up behind me and whispered,

" Reckon what color she doesn't see??? " I thought I was going to bust. We had

to scoot out of the room to keep from rolling on the floor. We've giggled about

that for years. -

junkinthere wrote: Hahaha! I totally forgot

about the slut! Why is it that nadas seem to think that so many

women/girls are sluts and whores? Not to steer too far off topic, but nada

thought my best

friend in high school was a slut. I was trying to make a case for why my best

friend was a

good person by saying that she really appreciates all kinds of people and will

befriend

anyone from old ladies to ethiopian exchange students. Nada was like " exactly,

she's a slut

because she doesn't discriminate! " Now I'm just laughing about it because it's

so ridiculous.

Finding the humor in all this is fun.

Melany

---------------------------------

8:00? 8:25? 8:40? Find a flick in no time

with theYahoo! Search movie showtime shortcut.

[Guest guest]

Your comment about discriminating reminds me of an incident with mom some years

ago. She was bragging how racially color-blind she was and said, " Why, just the

other day, this little black boy came up to me and I just hugged his neck. " One

of my best friends (who is afro-american) leaned up behind me and whispered,

" Reckon what color she doesn't see??? " I thought I was going to bust. We had

to scoot out of the room to keep from rolling on the floor. We've giggled about

that for years. -

junkinthere wrote: Hahaha! I totally forgot

about the slut! Why is it that nadas seem to think that so many

women/girls are sluts and whores? Not to steer too far off topic, but nada

thought my best

friend in high school was a slut. I was trying to make a case for why my best

friend was a

good person by saying that she really appreciates all kinds of people and will

befriend

anyone from old ladies to ethiopian exchange students. Nada was like " exactly,

she's a slut

because she doesn't discriminate! " Now I'm just laughing about it because it's

so ridiculous.

Finding the humor in all this is fun.

Melany

---------------------------------

8:00? 8:25? 8:40? Find a flick in no time

with theYahoo! Search movie showtime shortcut.